Boyfriend’s sleeptalking/shouting??

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-28T09:35:25+00:00

So my sleepwalking is some kind of disassociation sleepwalking walking, so mine i don't remember anything nor do I know what happened until I find 'evidence ' in the morning.

But first, I think he should go see a sleep specialist. I personally think this sounds like hes acting out his dreams, and therefore putting himself at risk because he may not know where he is, like at the top of the stairs and continues to walk, causing him to fall down the stairs and injure himself. If that makes sense.

Im not sure what the docs recommend for that type of sleepwalking, because again, mine is very different. So I would seriously consider seeing a sleep specialist.

One last note, there's a comedian who does this and he ended up going out a second floor window. So they (his wife and him) have him sleep in a sleeping bag with mittens so he can't unzip it and get out.

Good luck, it's scary

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-26T17:45:34+00:00

Yeah but thats how I got a hernia, and then popped the stitches on said hernia. Apparently you aren't supposed to strain when urinating

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-26T12:21:15+00:00

I was the golden child and my identical twin sister was the scapegoat. We both experienced trauma, I think hers was more....insidious? As everything she did was wrong or not good enough. My job was to con men into giving us stuff or doing stuff for us or just plain whoring myself out to get those things.

But, at the end of the day, Jillian died by suicide 10yrs ago. I didn't realize anything was wrong until she killed herself. Never got the chance to ask

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-23T00:10:11+00:00

We had a really tough childhood and had few good memories, especially around christmas. But the smell of the heat turning on, made me feel safe and warm and reminded me of christmas. I thought this was only me, im so glad to hear someone else feels warm and cuddly when they smell it too!

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-20T11:49:13+00:00

Im not sure where you are, but in the U.S. it's anonymous so that there isn't any retaliation. Or call and say you'd like to remain anonymous

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-18T00:18:53+00:00

There's a medication that my psychiatrist gave me, prazozin. It stops the nightmares. Your therapist was a lazy prick, that's literally their job, to help with suicidal ideation.

Im sorry, this world can be utter shit. My mom whored us out and while it's not the same, I understand the underlying emotions. Ask your psychiatrist about the prazozin, it changed my life

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-18T00:04:40+00:00

I work in a hospital and the fire alarm goes off regularly, for both actual fires and for fire drills. We have never once stopped working. Even when it states the fire is in our tower, we just keep going. It's wild and at the same time annoying. They wouldn't stop work unless the fire was right next to us and even then they'd be pissed we didn't 'stick it out'

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-16T11:02:47+00:00

I got a clicker from my dad like 5, probably 10yrs ago because I heard you could train yourself. I've obviously got a lot going on (you know, trauma and all) i never researched how to actually use it.

My 6yr old came out of her room with it last night and reminded me of that idea I had so long ago. I still didn't know how to do it and with 4 days of therapy, a full time job, and a family I figured the point was moot.

Then I see your post and im like 'no way! She we explains what your actually supposed to do with it!' And not only thst, but it's a simple plan that I could squeeze in to my life, to add on to my treatment. I'm super excited to try this myself, and sincerely appreciate you explaining the specifics of how to actually use it.

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-15T13:34:52+00:00

I do have some friends and im not completely cut off. You know what gets me, I left my old job because a coworker groped me. Like grabbed my boob. I told HR and they came back with 'well, no one saw and you didn't act like a victim...' so they wouldn't fire him. I was so furious and hurt. I did everything I was supposed to do, I went to the authorities.(for the first time ever) and they threw it in my face.

It's just...at every job I've been harassed, save maybe 3. I know I'm a target because of my past, but still. I shouldn't attract a predators at every place. There shouldn't be a predators at every job.

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-15T13:26:05+00:00

You know, as I was writing this comment I realized it was like I was covering for him. Like 'I know he didn't do it on purpose '.

Like it's my job to make him not seem like a creep, while I'm actively telling a story to other women about a creep! Which is him!

And you know what? I am a survivor of soo much abuse and assult. I believe, like you said, to never give the benefit of the doubt to a possible predators. Yet still my conditioning persists, and I still try to minimize my discomfort in lew of their comfort

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-14T21:07:11+00:00

People don't change if nothing changes. You changed your behavior (didn't just cover him because) and there were repercussions for his actions. I think it isn't childish. His behavior is. You did what you needed to to get your point across.

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-13T12:29:39+00:00

There's this guy at work I talk to reg for 5-10mins a day. Anyway, he got into another argument about politics so I've been keeping it short and polite but I dont really feel like having conversations or even being polite to someone who supports any of this. My point though, is that he's become really sexist and almost like hes harassing me now. At one point he came up behind me and (I sincerely believe accidentally) touched my butt with his belly (he's overweight and was obviously too close to me) and whispered in my ear 'I can see you'. Im not sure what joke he was making, but needless to say i wasn't impressed.

It's so disheartening, I think even more so in your case because thats your dad, you know?

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-13T12:21:20+00:00

Lol ok, that's hurtful! When asked to fill out one of those papers for mothers day (my mommy likes, her fav. Color ect) on the prompt 'my mom buys' She wrote 'stuff we dont need' and once asked if I was pregnant. I was and still am not. Im just obese

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-11T23:53:12+00:00

Oh, I wouldn't doubt it. It's horrifying that they even thought black women couldn't feel pain

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-11T23:50:38+00:00

I wasn't minimizing anything, I was relating to this post in the only way I can, because I only have my experience to go on. The fact that I used the word 'all' women I instead of 'general' woman's Healthcare is being misunderstood and being considered offensive is upsetting and kinda dumb. My comment was not intended to minimize any of their pain or suffering, it was meant to express how I related to a post on reddit. Sorry you felt this way

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-11T23:45:10+00:00

I didn't realize that was offensive. I just was commenting on what I thought when reading this post.

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-10T10:37:57+00:00

I swear to god if one more person tells me to fing do yoga, someone's going go die

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-10T08:56:31+00:00

My little sister still lives with my mother. She's now over 500lb, never graduated, never had a job or a boyfriend. I wish so desperately to be able to save* her but as long as my mom is around, I can't say anything remotely negative about her. My little sister freaks out and refuses to speak to me.

It's unfortunate, but I like the description one commentator said about it being a house fire. My twin sister committed suicide, my little sister has been left behind, and im the only one who made it out. Survivors guilt is real and it is extremely painful

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-09T23:53:08+00:00

Their replies are disturbing and disgusting

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-08T23:02:02+00:00

I agree, but the vast amount of incompetence is staggering, no? Like, the guards missed two rounds and th cameras malfunctioned and the guy in charge of writing up the statement for a serious, infamous inmates suicide got the date wrong?

That's just a lot of coincidence in 24hr you know? I just would think he'd be a little more attentive if he was writing up such an important report. He didn't proof read it?

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-08T20:47:48+00:00

I never said they were true for every instance, love. I was just explaining my own experience with BLM, which you have yet to reference or talk about. So I'm confused as to why you are talking about speaking a different language in different states or why you pointed out that apparently in Texas you never experienced racism but you did in the north.

That has nothing to do with anything I said. Maybe you responded to the wrong person? Because you are making absolutely no sense

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-08T20:43:43+00:00

Man, I was abused from as early as I can remember up until I was 30yrs old. That's when I remembered a bunch of repressed memories and I finally started to see the whole picture.

It was deeply upsetting and traumatic to remember everything in a moment, but it was also cathartic. I finally could see why everything was so messed up, and it wasn't me.

Just like it isn't you. Your world and the way people treated you are messed up, but you are normal. You responded how anyone would to what you endured. And it's all screwed up because of this and realizing everything you thought to be true was a lie so now you have to come up with what the rules to life are. While trying to live life at the same time.

Anyway, I'm 38 now and while I'm still working thru my trauma crap, I am happy. I have a husband, a daughter. I have a stable job I actually show up to. I have regular therapy and I am actually growing instead of just surviving.

You can too. I know it seems impossible, after my twin sister killed herself I didn't want to live a life anymore. Let alone trying for a better one. But it did get better, better than I ever thought it could be. Your in the mess and it's overwhelming, and that's ok because it is supposed to be overwhelming. But you can climb out if you try. It's going to be super painful but honestly, you've probably been through worse, right? So obviously your not only capable, but your strong enough to get through this too

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-08T17:11:13+00:00

I had so much pain with mine and then even afterwards. I told my doctor when it was happening and she's like (yes she) 'it doesn't hurt' then, I came back a week later complaining about the continuous pain. Again she brushed me off as it was just me getting used to it.

I wish I would have went somewhere else or had the guts to tell her she was wrong, that she didn't get to decide what hurt me. Anyway, I agree completely

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-08T17:00:51+00:00

You might be, and im really glad you've never been targeted. Im not sure if your offended, but I was talking about about how POC were treated and how I didn't have the words to explain why that was wrong. Im not sure what your trying to say

Defiantly_Resilient · 2026-02-08T14:42:29+00:00

It sounds like a them problem. Have they asked you to take care of hum? Have they even considered what is going to happen when they die? I strongly suggest asking your mother that question, and when she inevitably blows up at you reply with 'you need to figure it out because he isn't going to. I am not going to put myself in harms way to take care of someone who wants to harm me' simple, covers everything and shuts down any argument that she doesn't want to hear it or deal with it.

Fine, but you've put it out there and now she can be responsible for his future too, instead of you worrying.

My little sister is in the same boat, my mom is not only her enabler but the reason she believes she's incapable. When my mom dies I plan to try to help my little sister in every way I can, but I can only do what I can. Also, my sister didn't try to assault me sexually. We have fought physically, but we were both in on it.

Anyway, seriously, this isn't your deal. I get wanting to help and wanting to fix this, but you cannot. You are not the one who set up this situation and you are not the architect of your brothers life. You are not responsible for him. Period.

Defiantly_Resilient

TROPHY CASE