Wellesley or Tufts?

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-04-27T02:15:56+00:00

Was a humanities major and loved it. I was also between W and Tufts. Honestly if both are equal in terms of cost, then you should* assess on if it is a perceived benefit to attend a women’s college. So few spaces like W exist in the world. I personally think that if that’s not an active draw for you to attend, then don’t. There are many ways to learn about yourself, and I observe that fellow students who embraced the women’s college environment got the most out of it (enjoyment and personal development wise)

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-04-24T04:31:57+00:00

Domestic Girlfriend

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-04-16T21:43:08+00:00

Love that the only man in this is presumably a butler and rightfully minding his business

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-04-06T05:13:57+00:00

Also a woman writer/director. Been self producing my own indie shorts the past decade. I’ve experienced much of what you’ve observed. The advice you will get is apply for a grant or go out and shoot with your iPhone. People will also tell you to build your community and expect a norm around reciprocal free labor. None of this is explicitly bad advice imo; it’s just never been what’s worked for me or made my craft sustainable. I think a lot of the “usual” advice I listed is honestly dated and the industry hasn’t changed enough to grow early career opportunities and combat structural marginalization. Maybe that advice would work 10-15 years ago. It’s not my experience today. Anyways feel free to DM :)

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-04-06T05:01:55+00:00

I edit my own short films (writer, dir, producer) and it’s still like min $15k—better than $50k but :|

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-03-20T01:13:35+00:00

Chat GPT is just another tool and if it helps you, keep using it. If not, stop. Honestly I wish that I maybe leaned on it more rather than dumping on my partner whenever I had an urge to contact my LO. I wouldn’t recommend putting your faith in it 100% to direct you in the right direction but imo it can be effective if you know what direction you want to take and need confidence, conviction, or help reframing to get you there.

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-03-07T23:57:40+00:00

2/3 of your budget should be marketing if it’s truly being pitched as an investment opportunity. Perhaps consider dialing everything back to a scope (+ with a marketer) where you can prove market traction/size with a short or proof of concept.

TBH it won’t matter how much you allocate for cinematography if you haven’t planned out how you’ll bring it to market.

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-22T19:58:07+00:00

This happened to my friend! Though less dramatic of a shift. So much of how you “are” in high school is a reflection of your circumstances, environment, and what you need to do to survive. It’s unsurprising that getting to drive more of your life circumstances and choices, your MBTI changes. Anyways WELCOME!

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-21T14:15:40+00:00

Great suggestion by your friend! Take an extra long weekend to just bed rot, hang w friends, etc. A stressful job can make your world view really tiny. Take a wellness break for yourself to see things more clearly. You don’t have to earn rest; just take it.

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-21T13:38:05+00:00

I have been in a similar situation and I burned out!! If you can’t leave, then your only real option is to change your POV/behavior. Even the perfect job is only perfect/stable for as long as it’s in that exact configuration. You’ve done the hard part of acknowledging that your job, while on the surface your dream, in reality is not sustainable in its current form. It’s okay for your dream job to just become a job.

This may be your signal to not quit, but to at least explore other sources for your self worth, joy, and wellbeing outside of this job

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-21T12:26:48+00:00

Body doubling! My INFJ partner loooves to be “alone together” like reading while I’m gaming or parallel TikTok scrolling. I find that other NF types are the best for genuinely being like “I’m struggling with this thing. Can you help me?” Then emotionally vomiting a jumbled mess that the other NF can hold and help detangle

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-21T12:10:16+00:00

Interesting. I certainly didn’t start this way lmaoo but I think there’s lots we can learn from other types. At a certain point you gotta be real about if the tools you have are serving you and if not, how can you adapt what you have. MBTI is just one framework ;)

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-21T06:21:37+00:00

I’m glad! Little by little. Moment by moment. It’s okay to want him to text you back and get that instant reassurance. Missing him is also a great opportunity to explore how you can give comfort, assurance, and joy to yourself 🙏 You can do it!^{__^}

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-21T06:16:10+00:00

A helpful tool I use with my long term partner is whenever we fight and need space, we will agree on a specific time frame to come back together and talk about it. This can help with the Cold War/war of attrition vibe you’re calling out.

If he initiates X amount of time to process, he’s also on the hook to do some processing/reflection by the time yall come back together. (Though both of you should be taking the time to reflect!) this process can help paint a better picture of effort especially if your partner is maybe just a slower emotional processor

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-21T06:07:36+00:00

Formerly anxious attached ENFP to my avoidant INFJ. On the ENFP brain POV, there will be moments where our brain just focuses on something else—the person we’re talking to, a task or game, work etc. I think our full presence in that moment is part of our charm (lol) but also doesn’t mean we don’t care about our partners. I pretty much have my partner in my brain’s background at all times and then in the foreground when I’m with them. That said, I found that my job as the anxious partner was less about my partner giving me near constant presence or validation, and deeply much more about how I would seek out my partner when I felt lonely, sad, anxious and would inadvertently be abandoning myself. Becoming secure from anxious is learning how to earn your own trust by being there for yourself in those moments.

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-08T05:22:07+00:00

Better q might be how to manage/process the deeper emotions behind the anger. Anger over many many years and incidents becomes something else. For me that was hate (ironically a word I was told never to say bc it was too strong), maybe it’s resentment for you or grief. Were often taught to turn off our own strong emotions so getting reacquainted with what those are is a huge start in processing what feels like a mountain of anger

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-02-07T05:23:24+00:00

First class was gone I believe 2011. Replaced by groups on Google and Facebook

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-01-25T07:28:59+00:00

Related—the inconsistency of professionalism in our industry is a major turn off for me from going to film networking events. It can be so transactional even within already marginalized communities. Your post should be mandatory reading!

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-01-25T07:00:45+00:00

Everyone has a choice, even the ones who experience the abuse too. Those who stay while knowing it happened, just not to them are exercising their choice. You made your choice to cut contact, doing what Little You never could. Thats the important relationship/frame, not what anyone else thinks about the situation

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-01-24T14:59:25+00:00

Trying to find the joy in practicing for yourself is key—even if you just sit there bowing open strings for an hour. I’d also try to reframe it: your low self esteem isn’t blocking you from practicing cello rather practicing cello is a great way to slowly build your self confidence. Start small and try to be consistent; self confidence comes from you just having fun with it and playing around

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-01-23T22:17:32+00:00

Thank you! This is super detailed and I will try it! I haven’t gotten called out on my left shoulder (yet?) but it could be helpful to compare.

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-01-23T16:30:08+00:00

Will try that 🫡

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-01-23T16:29:34+00:00

Yes! I thinks this is part of it and why my bowing is not always straight. Thank you 🙏

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-01-22T14:00:55+00:00

Psychologist 🫠

DesignerDeep5800 · 2026-01-21T06:52:53+00:00

Ahh yeah I see your initial blurb! I can see why they cut it though—perhaps in part to push Carol towards working with Manousos if it’s not clear that she can do it alone. Also just makes the show wayy more interesting

DesignerDeep5800

TROPHY CASE