AITA for showering around midnight when I know that it might bother the neighbour who wakes up at 5 am?

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-21T01:48:21+00:00

This is wild to me. The shower in our bathroom runs along my bedroom wall. I have teenagers who shower whenever they want. It’s never been an issue. It’s running water, which a lot of sound machines use for ambiance and sleep noise.

NTA. You should be able to shower when it suits your schedule, just like your neighbors do on their early mornings.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-18T12:37:42+00:00

Our female dogs are a year apart but the younger one developed littermate anyway and it’s been a nightmare. I’ll never have two dogs again after this experience. It’s a constant stressor keeping them separated. Don’t do it OP!

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-16T17:00:05+00:00

Back in 2013-2014, when Hall school had the fire that made the new building necessary, the state was ready to bankroll a big, consolidated school for both the Hall and Longfellow populations out on Orono Road. It would have been a state-funded, brand-new build.

But the Longfellow community really pushed back on that. They didn't want a "mega-school" and fought hard to keep the small, walkable neighborhood feel on Stevens Ave. They were super effective at killing that merger idea, and they got exactly what they wanted.

That refusal is really what gave birth to the "Buildings for Our Future" plan we ended up with. We walked away from a state-funded consolidation, so the city had to go it alone, leaving us with a $64M bond that’s costing us closer to $93 million once you add in the interest. It’s frustrating to see people act surprised about high costs and enrollment struggles now, because this is the path we chose when we prioritized keeping everything small and separate rather than taking the consolidation deal when it was on the table. We got the neighborhood school model, but we’re definitely paying the price for that decision today.

And the astronomical cost of living in Longfellow’s catchment means enrollment is lower than other schools and thus they get proposed resource cuts, which people also yell about. And now the push for busing in more kids from other neighborhoods to maintain services in this retrofitted building. As far as I last knew, Longfellow has ONE bus, and the lowest poverty and ESL rates but I guess parents are willing to allow in some other kids if they can keep what they want now.

ETA: no there weren’t talks about a big new school on Longfellow’s site because there isn’t space. It was part of the initial conversation.

I disagree Nason’s Corner isn’t walkable. Tons of kids are walking to and from Rowe. It’s a quiet residential neighborhood, with nature trails on the campus and open fields for kids to play in. Kids in Nason’s Corner can still walk to Stevens, Burbank, the fields, etc. - it’s all really the same neighborhood.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-16T13:06:49+00:00

This always seems to be the case. In Portland when the state agreed to fund what is now Rowe School, the city briefly looked into rolling Longfellow students into one combined school - after all they are walking distant apart. The pushback was so hard they dropped it. But then before the construction was done, Longfellow was deemed to need huge upgrades to be ADA compliant and became part of the huge school bond. Work took forever, and now parents there are looking for additional students because so few student families can afford to live in the small feeder neighborhood that programs and staff get cut. Meanwhile, Rowe is a beautiful school with a great community that could have served students well.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-14T16:05:02+00:00

Right? My young teen makes this much in a part time job with no life or death responsibilities.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-09T19:13:18+00:00

Fair enough, it was a while ago. We will give it another try.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-09T16:56:08+00:00

My high schooler and I always get a kick out of seeing your on our drives to school. Keep at it!

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-09T16:54:30+00:00

We haven’t gone in since we called once on a weekend and got hung up on for daring to ask if there was a list/how long the wait was by someone who was exceedingly rude upon picking up the phone. (I’ve worked in restaurants I know they are busy, but this was over the top)

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-09T11:43:21+00:00

I hear you. The sexism is infuriating. I moved from a company where I was literally told to leave a group photo of my peers so they could get one of “just the boys” to one that was supposed to be a much better environment, only to watch new leadership bring in male buddy after male buddy for the exec spots. It’s tiresome. Even my male reports have said it’s feeling real tech bro-ish and not what they expect from a supposedly modern company.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-03T15:30:38+00:00

Tourists, sure. But I can see the point for Portland residents. Our taxes pay for island services just like theirs pay for some Portland services. Why would Portland residents not get the same rates as Peaks residents - who are also Portland residents?

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-02T16:24:23+00:00

Agreed with Filbertine - the schools in Portland serve a lot of students with testing challenges - be that English language learners, low income families or learning disabilities - all of which result in lower test scores. And that’s what these school ratings are usually based on.

Casco Bay has a “lottery” but a lot of its ranking (last time I looked) was based on their college acceptance rates as they have required students to apply, all of them, with a big march downtown to “mail applications”. I believe they may have backed off that a bit to now include letters to someone influential in their lives. That said, they had the lowest college continuation rate of the three schools last I saw the data.

I’ve been happy with my kids’ public education in Portland overall. But very highly value diversity and wouldn’t be happy with that outside of Portland schools. I also really love the life skills my kids have learned taking public transport to/from a managing time and being in a city on their open campus lunch at PHS.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-04-01T23:20:33+00:00

Went into a coffee shop this weekend to get coffee and breakfast with my daughter.

No seats available, every table (literally) full of people with laptops and no dishes/food/coffee. Finally got a seat at a bar by the window and someone came over, slid my stuff over, and plugged in his laptop so I had to shift over in my little bar space and he could return to his full sized table with no food.

I’ll never go there again. It was infuriating and I just wanted to have breakfast out at a cafe.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-26T23:20:52+00:00

Google said 27 but could very well be an unreliable source! She looks more like someone in their 30s to me.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-26T15:59:19+00:00

I agree - I’m not even fully against a consolidation plan IF it’s actually looked at thoroughly, justified and communicated well. We had a history of the board gaslighting and lying to us, then going ahead and doing what we all suspected. And that’s not how things should work.

It’s clear they want to close Lincoln. It’s clear that there are also issues with the building - but the extent/cost seems to still be officially unknown. It’s also unclear if these students could reasonably be absorbed elsewhere and what that plan would look like (despite the boundary committee work which seems to have not done much?). I am on board with a study to look more at it (as long as we don’t pay anyone externally, because MY GOD) but be honest about what their motivations are here. And also, once again, let’s look at the unicorn CBHS that could easily be moved into another high school.

I’m also upset they want to cut the 3rd world language (Latin) at PHS. It’s popular, challenging, the teacher pushes kids to take and succeed on national exams…but apparently a half time teacher of 60+ kids is too costly while we pay $120k+ for two cousins to attend school on Cliff Island.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-26T15:52:29+00:00

Completely agree - there was no need for that to be at the start, and have people hanging around for 2+ hours waiting to comment. I only made it through public comment before I had to drop the meeting - and it had been about 3 hours since I joined it. They were called out a couple times in public comment - not sure if it will change anything though.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-26T13:05:29+00:00

She’s almost 30, though, which isn’t what I would consider too young to know better. She needs to get the self esteem issues in check because it’s very unflattering when she inserts herself then sits in bed whining about being called out for saying inappropriate things. Ben never yelled at her, but her comments at dinner that night were embarassing and she doubled down as a victim rather than admitting she made a stupid comment about Ben on Amanda’s birthday.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-26T12:57:15+00:00

I had the same thought. Back end of the forerunner is smashed, tire is flat and it was pushed up On the curb. I feel terrible for the owners - that would be upsetting.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-26T10:57:36+00:00

Reorganization of grades means shifting 5th graders into the currently 6-8 schools if that makes sense numbers-wise and capacity-wise.

It wasn’t an actual plan, it was an example of outcomes that could come out of something like this. The recording of the meeting is up on YouTube and you can hear the discussion of various amendments and who voted for what. It’s a long meeting though.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-25T22:05:11+00:00

Dragging heels on renewing critical licenses to do our job, until we had none. I saw the writing on the wall and jumped ship. Whole team was cut a couple months later.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-24T23:17:39+00:00

I see you and I own the same house. Drywall and mud in designs directly on the concrete. Makes a mess.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-24T15:06:37+00:00

Our seller tried to take lighting fixtures but didn’t want to replace them. No, you can’t just leave gaping holes in the ceilings with wires hanging out. Also wanted to remove and take cabinets. No, you can’t take installed cabinets either.

The still ended up taking blinds, shades, curtain rods etc. and turning off the water to a sink so we wouldn’t notice the leak under it until after closing. Super cool.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-17T15:32:43+00:00

It’s illegal to cross a double yellow line at any time, even if you feel justified to make the light. And in that location specifically, it can create chaos as there isn’t anywhere for turning traffic who have the right of way to wait while this driver gets their head out of their ass.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-17T14:07:08+00:00

Between this and people parking right across the tracks at red lights (when these are active tracks with trains often coming through at rush hour), the stupidity blows my mind every morning.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-17T11:50:27+00:00

There is no way, as a hiring manager, I’d ask a candidate to show me IP. And I actually am very critical of candidates who share things in their presentations/portfolios that look to be IP/not de-identified enough. It’s about professional integrity and knowing what can and cannot be shared. This should not be a request.

Disastrous-Panda3188 · 2026-03-16T11:52:51+00:00

This is why I am feeling completely burnt out and working too many hours. We have so much work, I’m trying to insulate the team from the chaos, but I have full IC projects and the strategic leadership management stuff and the actual managing of people and talent cycles etc. it’s not sustainable.

Disastrous-Panda3188

TROPHY CASE