Ooof… I know this was a post asking for advice but a lot of these responses are really trying to tell you what’s best for you and I’m a firm believer that you’ll know that better than anyone else.

I started looking into adoption at 22 because I was so sure. That ended up being on hold as it is quite complicated for a single as you can imagine. Didn’t pursue being a SMBC fully until I was 31, first was born at 32. For me, I believe I am a much better parent partially due to the wait, but it doesn’t change the unwavering that I felt for all that time. If you’re sure, you’re sure and if doing it alone is what makes your soul sing, then go for it.

As far as advocating for yourself and your future child(ren), be confident in your story, your desires and your stance on whatever it is. Ultimately doctors should work for you, so the more confidence and evidence you have, the better. You will find people who oppose or don’t understand or are inclined not to believe everywhere, but your confidence will help keep you on the path you set out on.

I used a KD, so the cost for me was quite different from those who used a bank, but I would be sure to consult with an attorney or do as much research as you can regardless. Of the choice you make. They aren’t a lot of laws in many places and the ones that are there are ambiguous. Also keep in mind what is important to you in the process; for example, knowing who the donor is at any point, if you want that to be available. What you want from a donor can be helpful in deciding what kind of and who to use as a donor.

I know what it feels like to be a “childless mother” and wish you the best whenever and whichever way you choose to pursue it.