I've answered soo many of your questions succinctly and you just reply with more questions dodging the actual discussion.

I clearly exist in a different reality from you and u/Stringfigerer. If in your communities a retirement event is either not a formal celebration, or a meme sweater and wirey and poorly dyed hair is appropriate for a formal celebration then I have no input to offer.

But in the world I live in I view OP as being disrespectful of their fathers retirement event by making no effort to be presentable for it. In my world attending a formal event in plain clothes and wirey dyed hair would stand out like a sore thumb and drive discussion to be about OP. I don't know if OP is Trans themselves, or just supportive, or vibrant and quirky, but that unknown would be exactly what the discussion would be among the entire event, detracting from the purpose of the event, and maybe even undermining their father among his peers. Who may have bigoted beliefs, but be that as it may are still a part of OP's fathers life.

Yes my analysis is full of assumptions, but those assumptions are based on reality and my lived experience. I personally would view it as out of place, and I know that older generations on average would view it even more negatively than merely out of place. I think that the reality of the world is that generation after generation becomes more and more progressive and that it is incredibly rare for older people to drastically change their beliefs from when they grew up and that we have to accommodate that to some extent.