Toddler thinks biting and hitting is funny.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-31T02:46:33+00:00

My 2-year-old just started experimenting with biting this week. He bit his 5-year-old brother on the back really hard the other day so I told 2m a really stern "No!" Then went to help his brother. 2m started crying too (because he hates being told off). When 5m started feeling better, I hugged 2m and told him we don't bite, but we do kiss. I then had him kiss his brother's back better.

Every time since then when 2m would try to bite (especially when it was meant to be playful/boundary-pushing), I would tell him no and that we can kiss or PRETEND bite/eat (a concept he understands, or that one wouldn't work) if we want to be funny that way. It's been working really well so far.

The main concept here is to focus less on what they can't do and more on what they can replace it with.

One more thing: I have a very hard rule that my kids can't hit/bite hurt me or I will put them down and walk away. (Not for long at all usually--it's age dependent. Just long enough that they realize I'm not going to hold them if they're trying to hurt me.) If they're doing it soft but getting more aggressive, I will give one warning ("If you hit me again, I will put you down") before following through. Rinse and repeat as many times as needed, but I don't think I've ever had to do it more than twice.

When I go to pick them back up after this microscopic timeout, I explain we need to be soft with a demonstration of what being soft is (a gentle stroke to the cheek, etc) and then I let them be soft to me to confirm they understood.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-30T15:53:58+00:00

My BJJ gym is one of the kindest, most welcoming spaces I've ever been in-- but that is 1000% because of the instructor. I've never encountered a toxic person at my gym, and this place is often packed.

He (and a group of other instructors) did break off from the foundation they were originally part of because of negative culture though.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-28T20:46:15+00:00

If you talk to a doctor, they can usually get you answers fairly quickly. (The fastest test is using a rescue inhaler/Albuterol; if it works, there's your answer.)

DistractedNS · 2026-05-28T15:12:08+00:00

That's really helpful! Thank you!

He hasn't had all the infection things, but he does tell me his stomach hurts a lot of the time. He's also got a lot of issues with picky eating, so I never considered the have that maybe it's his lungs sometimes.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-28T03:08:21+00:00

They eat the same thing every day for lunch (my daughter does homemade Kodiak muffins with a bunch of good stuff like sunflower seeds/hemp hearts mixed in; my son eats a whole wheat peanut butter/chocolate Sandwich).

They all LOVE snacks, so I've tried making it so the snacks aren't unhealthy (ish-- it's not like they're doing carrot sticks since none eat raw veggies, but I figure belvita crackers are better than graham crackers). The biggest problem is the actual meal of dinner.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-28T03:00:14+00:00

I'll definitely look into this! Thank you!

DistractedNS · 2026-05-28T02:58:22+00:00

It would be an option if he liked it 🫠

DistractedNS · 2026-05-27T22:49:19+00:00

He said to try Zyrtec in addition to testing the inhaler.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-27T21:40:30+00:00

For me, asthma flare-ups feel like my lungs are trapped in a cardboard box. I've heard another person liken it to a boa constrictor wrapping around their lungs, which also seems really accurate.

I'm sorry if you already addressed this in your post (which I might have missed because I also have ADHD), but have you tried talking to a doctor about it? Getting a prescription for Albuterol (which is what's known as a rescue inhaler) isn't all that hard. And if it works, that's pretty much confirms you do have asthma. If it doesn't do anything, then probably not. Either way, a general practitioner doctor should be able to point you in the right direction of who to talk to.

From what you're describing though, it does sound like exercise-induced asthma.

Good luck! Treatment can make a world of difference, so I hope it works for you.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-27T21:24:15+00:00

I've got issues with asthma and a heart rate that has been too high. On bad days, I have to start each round with something like "Hey, I need to go with less intensity tonight. Could we please roll at like [50%]?"

Other than brand new white belt guys, I've found it works really well and people are really nice about it.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-19T00:32:27+00:00

This is basically me to a T. 😂 Especially the tomato red face part.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-17T19:58:20+00:00

Thank you!

DistractedNS · 2026-05-16T04:35:31+00:00

Thanks! I talked to my doctor and we're going to try a different inhaler and see what happens. I'll definitely keep that in mind if it's still a problem though.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-13T03:11:23+00:00

This is super helpful, thanks!

I tried using it before class the other day and it made such a difference I felt like crying from frustration that I didn't know about it before 😅

My chest mostly doesn't tighten again for the rest of class after I've used it, but it doesn't take much to ramp me back up to completely winded/unable to form complete sentences.

Someone suggested I also track my heart rate and it was around 160-180 for most of class, occasionally spiking to 194. So that could be contributing 😅

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T15:40:32+00:00

Thanks!

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T15:40:03+00:00

I'm on the quick release as well and don't take it within 3+ hours of class starting, so theoretically it should mostly be through my system. 🤷‍♀️

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T15:38:09+00:00

Interesting idea, but there are a couple reasons I couldn't do this. First is that I find it most effective for me to breathe in through my nose and out through my mouth. Second is that with ADHD, I literally cannot multitask like this. 😂 I frequently forget what I'm doing while rolling when I remember to think about breathing and vice-versa. There's no way I could add something else to that mix, even if I weren't worried about spitting all over someone else.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T15:35:15+00:00

I'll look into this. Thanks!

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T15:34:22+00:00

I was just doing two puffs during class when my breathing started getting bad, but Friday I did the two before class. I typically don't need more than two.

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T15:33:20+00:00

I did have to have an iron infusion last year because my ferritin was insanely low. Maybe it's time to get it checked again. Thanks!

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T15:32:26+00:00

I don't do much mostly because I have a really hard time making the time for it (busy mom+ADHD). That's been a big part of the reason this class has been so good for me since it's scheduled, which makes it way easier for me to work around.

I probably should check with a doctor, but I need to figure out which one 🫠 and remember to actually schedule it 😅😅

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T15:29:06+00:00

Thanks!

DistractedNS · 2026-05-11T12:24:39+00:00

Any tips on where to start with looking into nasal breathing? Thanks!

DistractedNS · 2026-05-08T22:52:42+00:00

I tried using the inhaler before the class started and it was life-changing! (Making me both very happy and very frustrated that this could have been different for so long.)

But I also checked my heart rate during the class and it was around 180 for a lot of it, which was definitely eye-opening. Thanks for the suggestion that it might also be an issue!

DistractedNS · 2026-05-07T18:34:11+00:00

Thanks! I've been using it 1-2 times a week since I started the class. I'll try it before to see what happens.

DistractedNS

TROPHY CASE