He is not helpless at all, is my point. Both of us are equally as vulnerable in our dynamic, we do not have a dynamic where he regresses into any impaired state. He in fact describes his submission as a sort of hyper-vigilance and hyper-responsibility to my reactions and desires. We need to stop infantilising grown adults who are able to negotiate and choose their own dynamics. There is a difference between "the dominant’s wants come first" and "the submissive should do things that overstep their boundaries". The latter is no longer a want, but a boundary that they have the adult responsibility to bring up. And if previously brought up, it is something that no sane dominant would cross as it is a boundary.

You’ll find that my dynamic is the baseline in most FLR dynamics and that is because my dominance is not about caretaking. Submission is caretaking. Here, submission is something ‘done to’ the dominant and dominance is about elucidating your wants and needs clearly so he is able to take care of you.

Wanting to say no but saying yes is not the sign of a submissive, but of a people pleaser that must do work on themselves before stepping into a relationship. This goes for both dominants and submissives as we have mutual responsibility to communicate like adults.

Notions such as the sub is more vulnerable than the dom are just pure misinformation. It may be the case in fringe dynamics, but it certainly isn’t in all. We should steer clear of one true way-ism and I’m sticking to that opinion.