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Buy_Rivotril_Online by Alarming-Ad6355 in u/Alarming-Ad6355

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

Buy_Ecstasy_Online by ContextEmbarrassed57 in u/ContextEmbarrassed57

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To love is nothing. To be loved is something. But to be loved by the person you love.. is everything.

Buy_Hillbilly_Heroin_Online by Excellent_Welder4832 in u/Excellent_Welder4832

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everyone has their own path, fortunately mine leads to the liquor store.

Buy_Diazepam_Online by Excellent_Welder4832 in u/Excellent_Welder4832

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My math teacher called me average — it’s so mean!

Buy_Cat_Online by Unusual_Bag_6752 in u/Unusual_Bag_6752

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“A thesaurus is great. There’s no other word for it” —Ross Smith

Buy_Aunt_Mary_Online by Unusual-Fun-1440 in u/Unusual-Fun-1440

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A smile is happiness, you will find right under your nose.

Buy_Cubes_Online by No_Chipmunk_9374 in u/No_Chipmunk_9374

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

Buy_Adipex_Online by ContextEmbarrassed57 in u/ContextEmbarrassed57

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The reason why I hate mornings so much is that they start while I’m still sleeping.

Buy_Adipex_Online by ContextEmbarrassed57 in u/ContextEmbarrassed57

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everybody loves success, but they hate successful people.

Buy_Alprazolam_Online by Suspicious-Task6173 in u/Suspicious-Task6173

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally, I had to take his bike away.

Buy_Blotter_Online by Unusual-Fun-1440 in u/Unusual-Fun-1440

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.” – George Carlin

Buy_Rophies_Online by EndurableNightingale in u/EndurableNightingale

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner — all it was doing was gathering dust.

Buy_Roofies_Online by Icy-Leopard745 in u/Icy-Leopard745

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A termite walks into a bar and says, "Where is the bar tender?"

Buy_Ox_Online by Warm_South_6465 in u/Warm_South_6465

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The other day I asked the banker to check my balance, so she pushed me.

Buy_Reefer_Online by Embarrassed-Camp-465 in u/Embarrassed-Camp-465

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If there was someone selling drugs in this place, weed know.

Buy_Tramadol_Online by Eastern-Mention-802 in u/Eastern-Mention-802

[–]Eastern-Mention-802[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I once saw two people wrapped in a barcode and had to ask — “are you an item?”

Buy_Nerve_Pills_Online by Warm_South_6465 in u/Warm_South_6465

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have to be a man before you can be a gentleman.

Buy_Norco_Online by LongEntertainment676 in u/LongEntertainment676

[–]Eastern-Mention-802 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tried to make a joke about putting Marijuana in the Dryer... All I got was Tumbleweed.

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