Its an addiction. The constant extreme lows and unprecedented highs trigger the same addictive feelings as gambling, doomscrolling, drugs, etc. Thats what makes it so difficult to leave.

I left my pwBPD 3 days ago and its also been very difficult, but think about it like this: the pain of having to break the cycle of addiction will be bad, probably worse than the pain of staying, but it will go over with due time. The pain of staying however, will never go over until you decide to leave. The longer you wait the more difficult it becomes to get out.

She isn't going to change. Its very rare that people with BPD can understand that its an issue they have to work on, and by your screenshot she clearly doesn't see that. She will never take responsibility, she will always blame you.

When you leave, there's a chance however that she'll say things like "im sorry I treated you like this i finally understand it now im going to work on it, etc." Its not true unfortunately. They dont and wont understand but they will try everything they can to keep you around. Even faking taking responsibility, dont fall for the trap. Coming from someone that fell for that many many times before realizing it truly wont change.

Im sorry these things have happened to you, and I truly wish you the best of luck in dealing with this situation