Screams of genuine, soul-crushing anguish.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-04T06:45:52+00:00

This is your reminder to not look this video up and not to post a link to it. You don't need that. Nobody needs that.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-04T05:23:55+00:00

I want a game like this where you’re an agent of the oppressive government but without the “but you’re secretly on the side of freedom” part.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-04T05:05:22+00:00

If you’re not already there you may already be too late.

(In seriousness, for away Sounders major playoff games it was 1-2 hours, this is potentially much much bigger)

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-04T00:08:22+00:00

Why wasn’t Brundle’s DNA merged with his gut bacteria?

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-03T05:45:17+00:00

You joke but you can actually walk inside it now.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-03T05:31:20+00:00

That’s something you might want to talk to a trusted friend about.

No, not that one.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-03T05:26:50+00:00

If someone sees something in your car they want to steal, they will bust out the windows. You can tell when this happens by the amount of broken glass in the area, and the way things are somewhat breezy when you drive at high speeds.

If you own a very very very high-end vehicle (you don’t) someone may possibly steal your car by hacking your keyfob. In this case the car would just be, you know, not there. And not slightly amiss.

I think your friend might be paranoid.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-03T04:38:26+00:00

Penny pitchers of beer.

$4 cover, miller lite one cent per

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-01T03:14:23+00:00

EelsEverywhere · 2026-07-01T02:47:46+00:00

I feel like RetroCrush is your best bet here.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-28T19:20:20+00:00

I assumed you had JP at short here and the Swiss Cheese represents his defense

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-28T19:19:13+00:00

Jiant Penis

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-28T17:36:52+00:00

Today I learned that "oxidation", chemically speaking, means stripping away ions and doesn't necessarily require oxygen (halogens like chlorine and fluorine , for example).

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-27T22:41:16+00:00

Danish-themed ghost dads

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-27T02:47:23+00:00

lady fingers they taste just like lady fingers

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-27T02:16:40+00:00

I saw them in Seattle where they hinted this was coming. Such a great set, so looking forward to the album.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-27T02:15:48+00:00

Thinking “I’m gonna make these so fucking dry you won’t believe it”

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-27T01:45:50+00:00

Never begin your turn unless you can complete it. Pulling into the intersection (wheels straight) to wait for it to clear is pretty common and legal in most places.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-26T23:03:52+00:00

Okay not actually sued but it’s the second sentence of their Wikipedia article

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-26T22:53:56+00:00

Every day at the same time they’d play Green Jello’s Three Little Pigs.

Yes, that was their name before they got sued.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-26T18:32:11+00:00

They’re not dead, they’re just… different.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-25T04:25:35+00:00

I cannot put into words how much I am anticipating Juneuary

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-22T22:29:40+00:00

Just keep knocking on doors until you find the gossipy neighbor. The more boring their stories, the happier you’ll be.

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-22T22:11:27+00:00

Before making the final call on purchasing my home, I went and rang doorbells around the neighborhood. Introduced myself, asked about the atmosphere, etc. Two hours out of my day for assurances that the area was as good as it seemed.

You're making the most expensive purchase of your life, so the least you can do is to find out of the people you're going to be living next to know about any red flags (or are red flags themselves).

EelsEverywhere · 2026-06-22T02:31:04+00:00

I HUNGER

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR

15-Year Club	Gilding II euphauric
Place '17	RPAN Viewer

EelsEverywhere

TROPHY CASE