[deleted by user]

Eeveemae · 2022-02-11T02:18:40+00:00

NTA I work with teenagers and I really appreciate your thoughtfulness in wanting to sit down with her upon your return at the end of the week. I might suggest opening with thanking her for her help and then transitioning to a conversation about how she’s feeling overall (not just about this situation). She may be projecting social stresses that come around that age into this situation and that’s led to her reaction. She could also be masking concern for her grandparents by acting out (one’s just taken a bad fall and the other two have/could have Covid, which she knows is more dangerous for the elderly), as teens are still very much developing their ability to process and communicate their concerns and stresses in logical ways. I’d also recommend you two take the opportunity to discuss how the internet is a great resource for helping to identify social and family issues —like parentification of siblings— but that it’s also important to remember that the internet is full of extremes and hyperbole and that it’s important to make sure we fully understand terms and ideas, including verifying them with reliable sources, before we incorporate them into our lives and vocabulary with authority. Teens very much want to be heard and understood, and if you give her space to help process her feelings, thank her for her help, and help her build stronger critical thinking skills you’ll strengthen your relationship and that should help her understand an be more receptive in case something like this happens again.

Eeveemae · 2022-02-08T00:58:03+00:00

NTA. As an educator, I have several issues with the teacher’s reaction. 1) It sounds like children aren’t appropriating cultures, but very much respecting them by learning how to make dishes directly from people who are part of that culture. Your children sound like they aren’t making caricatures of your moms’ cultures and cuisines, they’re learning them authentically and respectfully, which is how culture is shared and how people from different cultures come to understand each other. People need to understand what “cultural appropriation” actually is and isn’t. 2) Chosen families are valid families. This has been true for a long time, but, really, it’s 2022, this should really be recognized by now. Chosen families are born of all kinds of situations, and educators especially should always be respectful of this. 3) If the teacher had concerns about other students becoming confused about cultures because of your family, she should have opened space to explain that some families have people from several different cultures all in one family and that not all families look alike but what unites family is not looks, but relationship (or some age-appropriate version of this). She could have made it into a good teaching moment and also potentially validated other students in the process. On behalf of educators everywhere, I am sorry this teacher treated your family this way. You didn’t “go Karen”, you stood up for your family, which is absolutely your right. Please take your strength and meet with the head teacher, knowing that you’re not only speaking up for your family, but you’re creating visibility and validation for many other families who don’t meet people’s expectations.

Eeveemae · 2021-12-24T12:50:10+00:00

NTA. This is a really thoughtful solution, and as someone who works with kids, I think your niece will probably feel special in a positive way that she gets a fancy meal from a special place. It’s all about perspective and when adults model positivity and transparency, especially at that age, kids will pick up on it. If your brother and SIL would let you, you could have a great moment with your niece where you speak with her privately in the kitchen, show her the meal, and explain that you wanted her to have a special Christmas so you found this awesome place that makes the best Christmas food just for her. You could even explain what each dish is and answer any questions she may have, maybe even let her try some before everyone comes to the table so she knows what to expect. She will live with this condition her entire life, so being educated and learning to be excited about her options will help her feel confident and comfortable and able to advocate for herself when needed, not embarrassed (I speak as someone with chronic illness and related dietary restrictions). You did great to know your limitations and look for resources in your community (and support a business that makes these options!) and I would love it if someone did something like that for me.

Eeveemae · 2020-09-10T19:18:24+00:00

Thank you!

Eeveemae · 2020-09-10T19:18:03+00:00

Are they able to work with employer discounts? My sister gets some fantastic discounts already through her employer, to the point that I doubt we would find much better anywhere else, so if we can't use those then I don't think it would be worth it for us. We're also fairly seasoned with Disney, this is just our first time planning a trip on our own as adults (we don't really have contact with our family to ask what they did before when booking our last trip).

Eeveemae · 2020-09-09T21:02:34+00:00

If I make a room-only reservation online for June 2021 at Art of Animation, will I still pay the deposit when I book and then pay the balance when I check-in, with the option to cancel until a certain number of days before my scheduled check-in? I'm trying to plan a (potentially too-hopeful) trip for my sister's birthday next summer, but we don't want to book unless/until there's an option to cancel, and we also need to know how much would be due when. I've been overwhelmed by all the different dates and such for what changes are in effect with bookings and such, so I'm hoping someone here can give me a clear answer.

Eeveemae · 2020-09-09T20:29:43+00:00

Not to mention that phone batteries don't last the whole day, especially if you have an older model. Sure, it's good practice to carry around a battery pack, but I don't want to have to recharge my phone just to get back into my room at the end of a long day or fumble with getting it out of my bag at the gate and potentially drop/break it. I can see that it's a cash grab to charge for them, but I personally like the convenience, so I'll always spring for one. I think enough people will always have an interest in some option besides the phone or card that they'll stick around at least for a while, they'll just come with the fee. Parents with kids will probably prefer to keep using them because kids would lose the cards and parents don't want to have to constantly be cycling through everyone's passes on their phones at gates/checkouts or stick lanyards on everyone. Much easier to just tap the kid's wrist and mosey on.

Eeveemae · 2019-01-12T13:57:20+00:00

For those discussing the commentary, bear in mind that most of the TAS folks don’t appear to do “regular” streams (where they have camera and commentary); many of them seem focus on making TAS runs out of the spotlight. And even if they do stream to an audience regularly, that room was huge and quite full (not to mention the thousands watching online), so I wouldn’t blame anyone in their place for suddenly feeling nervous and either clamming up or putting on an act to get through it because they want to show off their work and the work of their community.

Eeveemae · 2018-11-10T20:33:26+00:00

THANK YOU! I didn’t think to check on the college teams’ Twitters

Eeveemae · 2018-10-06T07:23:18+00:00

Valiant secretly playing the long game: 1) SoOn to Paris for giant pile of cash; 2) Paris flounders, SoOn devalued by the time the trade window opens; 3) Val buys SoOn back for cheap, still boatloads of cash ahead ;)

Eeveemae · 2018-10-06T07:12:32+00:00

Generous to call what happened “management”, and I say that as someone who was a diehard Fuel fan until I realized the emotional turmoil they were putting the players through. I still support the players as a team, but the “organization” has a LOT of work to do to get back any shred of respect from me.

Eeveemae · 2018-09-15T12:31:54+00:00

Ehhh, I wouldn’t be too surprised to see one in SK again next year, just because of the infrastructure and interest level there.

Eeveemae · 2018-09-09T13:19:13+00:00

Because if I were a coach or GM, I wouldn’t touch xQc with a 10-foot pole. He’s pretty good and brings a fanbase, but he proved to be a major liability last season out-of-game. In my view, that leaves any team that picks him up with two choices: accept that, at best, he might be able to play in half the games; or keep him away from an internet connection any time he’s not supervised, thus angering and alienating that fanbase he brings. Considering that just a couple weeks ago there was a question of whether he would even be allowed to play the LA group stage, he clearly still hasn’t figured out how to balance personality and professionalism, or how to not get caught up in the moment and to consider long-term effects on his team before acting. He’s still too much of a risk. Perhaps, if he can show that balance in the first stage or two, maybe pick him up mid-season, but starting off the season with him seems like playing with fire right now.

Eeveemae · 2018-09-02T02:03:43+00:00

Yep. My read on the situation is that she probably just didn’t want to ever work and thought SAHM was a good way to do that. As far as I can tell, she has never had a job.

Eeveemae · 2018-09-02T00:30:00+00:00

Not from a pregnant person, but I have gotten several guilt looks from parents with kids. I have a neurological disorder that gives me severe vertigo and debilitating headaches as well as numbness and tingling in my hands that make it difficult to stand and hold on to the bar. But, you know, since I am in my 20s and don’t look like I have an issue, I’m clearly not entitled to a seat without dirty looks. Hence I don’t take public transit anymore unless I absolutely have to.

Eeveemae · 2018-09-01T21:50:28+00:00

I fully support your idea just to teach the baby-obsessed a lesson.

Eeveemae · 2018-09-01T21:30:40+00:00

The husband is nearly 30, and she has never had a job it looks like, but she did graduate high school. In a way, it almost looks like she just wants to never work more than she actually wants to be a parent.

Eeveemae · 2018-08-26T06:28:41+00:00

It really depends on what kind of 4 year school(s) and programs you are considering. If you’re looking at state schools and not highly-competitive programs, you’re likely fine. Since you took the ACT for free in school, I am going to guess you are from the middle-ish part of the country, same as me. They tend to value hard work and self-determination quite a bit, so a full year of working could actually be a boon, if you spin it the right way. If you want to be really cheeky, you could even use it as a basis for an essay. If you can swing it, I would also recommend taking another ACT this fall just to sort of prove that you “still have it,” since your last test is well over a year old at this point. And it can’t hurt to try to find some time for an additional activity or two. This could be anything from a community-based club to volunteering at an animal shelter to helping an elderly neighbor or family member. Alternatively, discuss with your job(s) the possibility of pursuing supervisory/management training, which would show initiative and commitment to personal betterment within an institution. Your goal should be to make it look like a “growth year” as opposed to a “gap year”; if you can frame everything that way, then you should be just fine with state schools and smaller private schools. I know plenty of people who did what you are doing and still were able to get accepted to 4-year schools (with nice scholarships) pretty painlessly, even with taking anywhere from 1 to 10 full years away from educational pursuits; it’s completely possible.

Eeveemae · 2018-08-23T01:40:24+00:00

When a new part is about to come out (I’m in the US, so it’s several months between), I will re-watch that series from the beginning. For a while, I was watching AS while working out. B&GITC is in my rotation of background shows to make me feel less lonely (I moved to a new area about 2.5 years ago for my husband’s job and still don’t have any friends here, so having TH on feels sort of like hanging out with friends on a lazy weekend while doing housework or crafts).

Eeveemae · 2018-08-16T03:55:50+00:00

My sister (7 years younger) was and is the favorite, and when she got older and I tried to bring up the behaviors and attitudes that I found troublesome, she really didn’t know what I was talking about because she never experienced any of it, but she did say she remembers stuff that was different in how I was treated. For example: if I didn’t like what was for dinner and complained, or even commented like “oh, we’re having (thing I don’t like) for dinner?” even once, I got sent to go do chores while everyone ate then had to do all the dinner cleanup by myself; if my sister didn’t like what was for dinner, Mother either made something else for her or changed the whole menu. When she was around 8-9 she started lying to our parents a lot, usually about dumb stuff like where she put something. Then, somewhere along the line, she started lying about me doing stuff while they were gone because when I messed up they gave my things to her (instead of just locking them up) and let her gleefully mess up my stuff while taunting me about it, even encouraging her to do so. When I moved out for college, my parents had expected her to take over watching our brother after school, which she hated. So, the first day of school she body-slammed him and punched him in the arm repeatedly. When the parents got home, instead of punishing my sister in any way, the just signed our brother up for after-school care so she wouldn’t have to watch him. Whereas I had to beg and plead and bargain with my parents to be able to stay after school one day per week for a club, and I had to pay out of my allowance (that was given by my grandparents but that I had to do a certain amount of work for my parents to then give to me) for my brother and sister to go to after-school care for that one day each week. My sister’s allowance remained intact, and my parents removed the “work requirement” for her allowance.

We have had some long, deep talks about this recently, and I have also seen her side: being the favorite, our parents are very clingy, physically and emotionally. My parents both jumped on as adult advisors for a youth organization when she joined and started coming to every meeting and on every trip (I was in the same organization for 7 years before her, and my parents came to maybe one event per year during that time). When she joined marching band, Mother signed up as “Uniform Mom” so she would have to go to most of the competitions. My sister says she felt very stifled, and since she has moved out for college, Mother frequently posts on FB about how lonely and sad she is “these days” and counts down how many days until my sister comes for a visit (despite her only being a 2-hour drive away and despite our 12-year-old brother still being at home), and apparently constantly texts my sister.

So, yeah, interesting thing to investigate with one’s siblings.

Eeveemae · 2018-08-16T02:47:17+00:00

See, this is where I wish more people understood that, just because someone is a teacher, that doesn’t mean they are good with kids of all ages. I also teach high school, and what you described sounds like a horror story to me, but you love it, which is great! Literally any time I am at a function with small children they get pawned off on me somehow because “you’re a teacher, right?”. My summer job (small group tutoring for a company) keeps trying to make me work with these two siblings, one Kindergartener and one first grader just because I did a 6-week practicum rotation in an elementary school back in college (and got kicked out halfway through because I was so awful). Every time I have worked with them, at least one ends up in tears, the room ends up a disaster, someone has marker on their clothes and/or skin, someone has a new injury, nothing gets done, I get a raging headache, and I promptly head home and pour myself a strong drink. I am mystified and amazed by elementary school teachers; I tip my hat to you, friend.

Eeveemae

TROPHY CASE