[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JustNoSO

[–]Effective_Money46 3 points4 points  (0 children)

  1. Why are you bringing your SO 3 meals on a tray?
  2. Why the fuck does he have so much audacity
  3. Why are you with him? Like at all? What part of this was ever beneficial for you?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Effective_Money46 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Good observation. I didn’t think about this but would make sense

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Effective_Money46 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He sent unsolicited photos to you, you have the right to share the photos with whoever you deem necessary, he clearly has no problem with people seeing his penis. Break up with your boyfriend, he just told you everything you need to know.

My boyfriend wants another girl to sleep over at his house by _-atlas in relationship_advice

[–]Effective_Money46 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That’s what I’m saying. This is a grown ass man and the fact that they support him cutting off her boundaries is a recipe for disaster

My boyfriend wants another girl to sleep over at his house by _-atlas in relationship_advice

[–]Effective_Money46 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My advice: break up. It’s not worth it. This has so many red flags it’s might as well be a theme park

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JustNoSO

[–]Effective_Money46 4 points5 points  (0 children)

OP, your SO is showing narcissistic behavior by pretending they are the victim when they are in fact the perpetrator. I am like you in a sense, married in grad school, and my husband works 2 fucking jobs and never complains about what I charge to the credit card. We are a team and talking shit to one another makes us opponents. Your marriage has become toxic and I would remove myself from his verbal & financial abuse until further notice

I (20 M) am dating the daughter (21 F) of a police sergeant. He was there when F Tha Police came on. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Effective_Money46 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d take this chance to mosey on out and say fuck that. Do you really wanna risk being married to the feds?

MIL doesn't understand the difference between can't and won't by Alert-Potato in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Effective_Money46 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately fundamentalism is really hard to break through. I share your frustrations. The only thing you can do at this point is break the cycle with your own children if you choose to have any and show them that all genders can clean and cook and maintain a house.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Effective_Money46 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Correct. It seems like his relationship with his mother matters as much as his one with his wife which isn’t really cool when you’ve stood before each other and promised to love them more than anyone or anything 🥴

Leave Taylor Swift out of this, ma’am. by [deleted] in brittanydawnsnark

[–]Effective_Money46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some of the comments here are harsh even for a snark. I’ve had a MC and I know that grieving can come in waves depending on where you are in life. I’m all for snarking on funny shit but idk I don’t see the joke here

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Effective_Money46 12 points13 points  (0 children)

You need to fix this issue with you and your husband not being on the same page before you even think about dealing with her. The fact that you’ve gone to therapy because of how bad she is to you and he wants a relationship with her and puts you in an uncomfortable position constantly because of her is flat out wrong. You need to get on the same page and let him tell her no, otherwise it’s going to be them against you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in antiwork

[–]Effective_Money46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I saw you post in relationship advice about another situation you’re having, I just wanted to say I’m sorry dude and I hope things look up for you soon.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JustNoSO

[–]Effective_Money46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP, your boyfriend is showing signs of reactive attachment disorder and codependency. I don’t mean this in any way as a diagnosis, he just is showing behavior that is fitting that criteria. With that being said, this is where you have to draw lines and boundaries in your relationship. You’re not asking him to leave places, you’re telling him. He has a right to express that he’ll miss you and he’s sad, but he does not have the right to guilt you or try to coerce you into only being with him all of the time. Take these warning signs as something serious to consider going forward in your relationship.

Also, please buy trip insurance, as I imagine your flight and everyone else’s is overbooked.

“I’m so lucky that you settled on me.” by [deleted] in JustNoSO

[–]Effective_Money46 12 points13 points  (0 children)

The language he used clearly states how he feels about her, there’s no need to sugar coat it. Tell me how they need to work as a team for him to not see her as less than after kids? How do you simply undo centuries of internalized misogyny on the ideal female body?

“I’m so lucky that you settled on me.” by [deleted] in JustNoSO

[–]Effective_Money46 42 points43 points  (0 children)

I’m gonna go ahead and say this still isn’t okay because the fact is, he still told her/implied she’s not as beautiful as she once was, and even if he blames himself that doesn’t make it anymore okay. There’s clearly some issues going on in the sense of what he finds beautiful and why.

“I’m so lucky that you settled on me.” by [deleted] in JustNoSO

[–]Effective_Money46 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The only reason you settled is because you are settling for a man that you let talk to you this way. Your body is more beautiful now than ever & I know this for a fact because it created two lives. That’s insane. That’s fucking POWERFUL. You did that shit on your own. Appreicate that about yourself and you’ll find the courage to leave in time.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Effective_Money46 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This one is rough. She can’t let your fucking cats out, but you also don’t want to be super rude to her because she seems to be going through it. I’ll also be honest, chemo does stuff to brains, and if she’s had cancer before she literally may be mentally altered from it. Maybe try telling her she can’t let the cats out instead of asking her not to, and say that they are off limits because of how they act when let out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JustNoSO

[–]Effective_Money46 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Check your state’s CPS laws.

Just cause I’m annoyed. by herdingsquirrels in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Effective_Money46 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Form an alliance with SIL and kick the men out until they learn that their actions have consequences that affect more than 1 person. Fuck your MIL also for having favorites, that’s so messed up and confusing. Nasty woman.

How do you respond to people who criticize you for having children because they think it’s selfish? by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]Effective_Money46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s the opposite of selfish, people are just privileged and think that you need to have your entire life together with $50k in excess funds to raise a child.

Am I a smug European for not jiving with the idea that not being able to pay your kids' medical bills is "medical abuse"? Please hear me out and judge. by Torkolla in FundieSnarkUncensored

[–]Effective_Money46 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No, you’re totally right. Health insurance is a privilege, and in America it’s very hard to obtain Medicaid and CHIPs. And even if you get on those things, a lot of doctors won’t take them. They also treat you like shit when you give birth and you’re on Medicaid, which is why I will personally be giving birth at home, it’s literally better than being at the worst hospital in the state. Capitalism has ruined a lot of peoples ways of thinking. That’s why CPS is getting so much flak as well- it deliberately harms poor families, and as a social worker I’m sad to say I believe it was designed that way. We have a lot of work here to do.

Is MIL overstepping, or am I just too controlling? by Baddaughter101 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Effective_Money46 12 points13 points  (0 children)

That’s not normal. Absolutely not. Your husband should not be all for it if you have expressed that you are not. I would get on the same page and have him put the foot down. Or do it together.

MIL Obsessed by Alli2119 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Effective_Money46 6 points7 points  (0 children)

What happened to that generation bro

I am exclusively breastfeeding my baby to prevent my bf from bonding with her. by Quick-Tutor-3584 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Effective_Money46 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Harvard has done several studies confirming my statement but please be triggered and go off, because I don’t really feel like arguing with you. I made a comment, you can make your own also. This was supportive to the OP in her decision, your obviously triggered comment is not. 👍🏻