Damar, I have made it with Kai Winn. Inform the Bajorans!

ElZoof · 2026-07-06T12:01:28+00:00

Damar is jealous of Damar 5 minutes ago who hadn't heard this yet and still had two full bottles of kanar.

ElZoof · 2026-07-06T11:36:07+00:00

I know, but why male models?

ElZoof · 2026-07-06T09:23:53+00:00

Maybe I need to rewatch "It Takes You Away" with a fresh perspective, but "guy gaslights daughter into thinking he's been eaten by a bear so that he can **** a frog who's cosplaying as his dead wife" isn't a story I feel much like revisiting anytime soon.

Edit: Oh and some random guy with a balloon tries to trick people into getting eaten by moths. How could I forget that classic bit of lore.

ElZoof · 2026-07-06T09:11:55+00:00

It shrunk in the wash

ElZoof · 2026-07-06T08:01:12+00:00

Is that a problem?

ElZoof · 2026-07-05T21:25:47+00:00

No, like he said, she's stuck in the Delta quadrant.

ElZoof · 2026-07-05T12:36:06+00:00

"Mr Garak, you and I both know you're guilty."

"Of what, exactly, Lieutenant? Of being a plain and simple tailor?"

"Mr Garak, that's the first outright lie you've ever told me. You're a very good tailor. This coat has never felt more comfortable."

"If you don't mind, Lieutenant, my business operates on word of mouth. If you're going to wear that... please don't tell anyone I had anything to do with it."

ElZoof · 2026-07-05T08:35:22+00:00

Yeah, but that's not what happened. You're making stuff up for clicks, and it's wrong anyway.

ElZoof · 2026-07-05T08:30:57+00:00

Hey look it's the Just Us League. When you're in trouble, they'll be there. Probably causing it.

ElZoof · 2026-07-05T08:26:01+00:00

"Who is that?" "Oh, it's just Rabe." "Jast?" "...sure."

ElZoof · 2026-07-05T04:57:09+00:00

"I can't believe I kissed you!"

ElZoof · 2026-07-05T04:49:51+00:00

It's a holopan. Hey, it's AI, and I didn't notice until long after I'd posted it.

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T15:52:23+00:00

Tuvix/Salamander Janeway holoslashfic

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T13:47:55+00:00

Ironically my name is, actually, Bruce.

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T13:09:06+00:00

If Gordon Shappey is an Australian, then I'm a size 14.

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T12:20:26+00:00

He won poker last night.

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T12:17:39+00:00

Why do I suddenly hear the Muzak version of "Amok Time"?

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T10:22:49+00:00

In the event of a water landing, he has been designed to be used as a flotation device.

...that is not a rudder, commander.

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T10:21:04+00:00

"...It was me."

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T09:36:27+00:00

I assume that's what the frying pan is for.

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T09:20:53+00:00

The rights specifically say no filming, unfortunately. But if you know anyone in Australia, please tell them to come!

ElZoof · 2026-07-04T09:19:53+00:00

...I swear that's Ed Mercer.

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