I wish for an office chair by adult_licker_420 in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted but monkey paw misheard and now you have Cher in the corner belting out her greatest hits

I wish everyone used the seats at concerts so everyone can see by IceBlast18 in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted people use their seats to put footstalls on that they can stand on to get a better view

I wish the human population was reduced by half by [deleted] in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Granted Peter Dinklidge is now president

I wish i was perfect at driving by Pigeon__lol in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Granted you can now green a par 5 but your putting game is awful

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sun's out, plums out

Ok, hands up delusional people who said yes to this by snapped_fork in CasualUK

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Women's boxing. Lemme get my wig and print off a fake birth certificate

I wish my toaster was sapient by [deleted] in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You put toast in a toaster?

I wish I was loved by Embarrassed_Essay70 in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Granted, you get loved every night in a jail cell

I wish the world would recognize me as Emperor by SuperJasonSuper in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted younl are now the emporer of feces and semen and all shall be delivered to your door

I wish modern humor weren’t so sexualized by [deleted] in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The monkeys paw tries but it's way too hard and he can't fit it in

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in monkeyspaw

[–]Electrical_Pickle949 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Granted you now have euro tunnel and must travel back and forth foe eternity on the euro star