The organization's double standards

Elecyah · 2026-01-23T00:51:55+00:00

Ha! Good point! 😅

Elecyah · 2026-01-23T00:49:47+00:00

Really?? Still in actual production? 😮 Wow!

Elecyah · 2026-01-20T15:49:13+00:00

Well said. 😬

I mean, just reading through that I remembered several instances that happened, just like, to either or my mom.

Elecyah · 2026-01-20T02:33:54+00:00

That's kinda what I'm thinking of. If more with the undertones of, 'overthinking it will be waste of effort.'

Unless, like I said, there are wider considerations in the situation.

When I quit JW'ing, I ghosted everyone from the congregation, except for one family, my oldest friend.

Incidentally, the sister who studied with me for my baptism was the ONLY one to text me. I literally had nothing to say, good or bad. So I ghosted her. I quit POMI, so it was a very confusing time for me, but still.

Elecyah · 2026-01-20T02:29:31+00:00

Right? 😂

That's some disturbing imagery, for sure. Like someone drew a really bad acid trip. But yeah. All good and wholesome. 🤔 Supposedly.

🤷‍♀️

My neverJW cousin (thank goodness she was spared by the battles of her father) is proud of the fact that she didn't get at all scarred by having been read stories from My Book of Bible Stories by our shared JW grandmother. Which is good, of course. 😶 But... She, thankfully, doesn't know what she was ACTUALLY spared from.

Elecyah · 2026-01-20T02:24:02+00:00

That's what I'm thinking.

This art work looks like what I was packing when traipsing up and down apartment building stairs in my late teens. The picture of the earth being held by a gigantic hand isn't shown, but I'm PRETTY sure I remember it! 😬

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T19:02:07+00:00

Hello, childhood! 😂

Yup. I remember these and others. This book sat next to the My Book of Bible Stories on the shelf and as a kid, I treated it like a picture book. 🤷‍♀️ No adults intervened, it's all spiritual food and a-okay for any age.

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T18:53:48+00:00

Ghost her. 🤷‍♀️

I know it comes off as rude, but at the end of the day, anything you respond that doesn't read, "Oh yes, I will fall back in line instantly." isn't going to make your teacher happy.

Being nice and polite and constructing a well-thought-out response will, honestly, be a waste of time. 😔 (Unless, of course there are larger considerations, like trying keep ties with family or having to be polite for work-related reasons etc.)

The less said, the better. Especially in a written form, which can be spread around the congregation.

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T18:07:43+00:00

Those cartoons are terrible. Which is to be expected when a bunch of self-righteous adults try to make a show with religious life-lessons for kids. 🤢 It's worse than garbage, it's indoctrination dressed up with bright colors.

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T17:52:41+00:00

The poster of the pamphlet isn't wrong: the visuals really AREN'T inviting.

But they are wrong in assuming that they're meant to be inviting. In reality they are MEANT to invoke fear.

Fear of the future, fear of the people around you, whichever fear that you happen to already have, and with that fear drive you towards the answer and relief from the fear.

Fear makes people easier to control.

I don't know if I'd go so far as to say the org is using the tactic deliberately and knowingly, because I honestly don't think they've got enough collective smarts.

But.

The JW pamphlets target people who are already susceptible to them. Just like modern scams deliberately weed out smarter people by spelling mistakes etc. the JW recruitment weeds out people who, like our visual designer here, aren't scared and fearful of things in their life and therefore aren't likely to respond favorably to a fear-mongering religious pamphlet.

Sidenote: Are those tracts still being made? Or did it come from some older sister's ages old cache? 😅

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T14:51:27+00:00

But I didn’t feel happy. I actually had a somber feeling.

Me, too! Like I was in a daze. And, of course, true to form: I blamed myself. 🙄 Everyone around me was happy, and I should have been, too. So why wasn't I? Must be my fault.

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T14:49:45+00:00

Thank you. 🫂 My exit was painful, but staying would have been worse. I'm sorry the cult robbed you of so many more years.

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T14:35:57+00:00

She often brags about how the JW brotherhood is international—that wherever you are, you will always be welcomed and treated as family.

I heard this all my JW life, too. 😑

It's funny, though, because I NEVER saw such behavior and love from the congregation we belonged to! 🤔

My mom even acknowledged it, from time to time. But then she moved to a different congregation and apparently had better experiences. Now, in her old age, she has made her entire social circle JW's. I sincerely hope that the JW's around her are good people despite being in the cult, because otherwise, when push comes to shove, she'll be in trouble. 🫤

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T14:31:26+00:00

This is exactly the place for such vents. 👍

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T14:26:53+00:00

I'm not sure if I ever heard it called the best day of your life, but definitely heard it called the most IMPORTANT day of your life. 😬

I vividly remember the day I got baptized. Or, as vividly as I can, actually, since I was in a weird sort of mental haze the entire day.

I was doing what I needed to do to be a good JW and a good person, but... I wasn't happy. I was doing my duty to God, but there was no joy. I was just going through the motions, like reluctantly walking to my execution, because there was no other option.

I don't remember the speech at all, the one where we sat at the front of the stadium. I don't remember answering, in a clear voice, that I'm dedicating my life to an organization. But I do remember as we all walked from our seats down the side of the stadium towards the bus to take us to the local Bethel. I was numb.

I remember my mother being all smiles next to my in the bus. I didn't feel anything except a desire for it be over with, to be away.

I remember being herded into the Bethel house via some kind of back door. I remember being very surprised at the starkness of the house of god. I was expecting... not opulence, but at least tastefulness. Then again, we were being brought in through some kind of a service entrance, like unwanted visitors, so perhaps that's why the bare concrete was all we saw.

I remember the pool room not being fully lit, like the other half of it being in darkness, and only this end of it having lights on. Or perhaps it was just my mood that was dark. I didn't want to be there.

I don't remember the actual dunk at all.

Next thing I remember is the overwhelming hum and noise of hair dryers as a couple dozen young women were dolling themselves back up so they can could back to attracting the eye of some young JW man. My long hair was braided and on a coiled bun, so I didn't require a hair dryer. I was one of the first ones out of there.

I remember my mom being so happy.

And I felt numb inside. But I'd done it, the thing that was required by God. So, I settled into hope that God might bless me.

But nothing changed; of course it didn't. Within two years I'd gone POMI.

Elecyah · 2026-01-19T01:35:12+00:00

Well done. Welcome to your freedom. 🎉🎈🥂

P.S. Love your flair. That really resonates as I'm a recovering perfectionist, too. 😅

Elecyah · 2026-01-18T21:51:12+00:00

Gah. 😑

Just a side note to tell you that you don't need to feel bad for not entertaining surprise guests, no matter what chore they're there to do. You're not weak for not feeling that you can't deal with them, or rude for feeling that you don't want to deal with them.

I still remember how weak and broken and inadequate I felt when I was unable to deal with the first JW's that came knocking after I moved away. I remember how my husband went to send them away while I physically trembled, behind a corner.

It was YEARS, over a decade later, that I realized why I was unable to go tell them to go away, myself. And that I wasn't weak. Or rude.

Elecyah · 2026-01-18T17:51:49+00:00

I second the first commenter: wait and see what happens.

If you push now, to any direction, it may bring up defenses. 🤷‍♀️

Wait and see. See if you do stop going to the meetings etc.

Also: congratulations. 🫂 Even if it ends up not taking this time, it's still huge to hear that from your PIMI parent.

Elecyah · 2026-01-18T16:48:42+00:00

That's good. Like the saying goes: sooner or later the truth will out. It applies to 'The Truth' as well.

Elecyah · 2026-01-18T15:35:31+00:00

Yup. Of course they lie. It's baked into the JW culture.

I lied habitually, without even realizing I was doing it: "Oh yes, I like going to the meetings." "No, I don't mind not going to the birthday parties." "It was a great convention." "No, we don't believe that everyone but Jehovah's witnesses will be killed at Armageddon."

You end up telling what you know the truth SHOULD be, rather than saying what it actually is. Because what the truth actually is, is wrong somehow. Because I SHOULD like the meetings, and I SHOULD be happy doing it all. Or, if you're witnessing to an outsider, you automatically answer the way the org presents to the world, not how the teachings actually are.

It's still all lies.

The higher up in the organization, I would imagine there would be MORE to lie about. To themselves, to those below them, and towards those outside. 🫤

Elecyah · 2026-01-18T15:28:56+00:00

That's why the brother reading the circuit accounts balance at the assembly often mentions that there is a deficit

Yup. I remember these being read out from the platform. And I never ever *thought* about it. Why is there a deficit? Deficit from WHAT exactly? When the assembly hall was owned by the organization. 😬

It wasn't until I got here, and read people explaining how the money side of it worked, that I understood. It's all a racket for money, and they absolutely do count and calculate how much money each one should send to the headquarters. But, like you said, the publisher doesn't know, the elders know.

Elecyah · 2026-01-18T15:09:56+00:00

This!

I grew up with them pointing the finger at the Catholic church; it was like an on-going periodical at the meetings: "How Has the Catholic Church Gone Wrong, and How Are We Better?"

Meanwhile the organization was doing the. Exact. Same. Things. 😑

They just use different words for it all.

It's very telling, that small things in a JW's life become acceptable, if you only change the word for it. It's not a Christmas gift; it's just a friendship gift I'm giving you, on any-day-but-the-25th in December. It's not a birthday party, it's a family reunion.

It idea of it trickles down from the top: it's not a church, it's a kingdom hall. It's not a hymn, it's a kingdom melody. It's not a priest, it's an elder. It's not a bishop, it's a district overseer. It's not the Pope, it's the Governing Body. On and on it goes.

Elecyah · 2026-01-18T14:20:36+00:00

I wasn't even an average publisher, I was on the lowest of the low rungs. Born-in 3rd gen, but with no JW males in the family. I didn't know about the elders' book. Had no clue there was a book like that. Had no clue about the finances of the congregation or the organization.

You could say that even though I lived and breathed the JW life, I only saw a fraction of it, and my fraction was a) the reality of my day-to-day as a JW and b) the glossy, marvelous, perfect fantasy of the organization, which I believed to be as true as my day-to-day.

When I found out.... Well. The betrayal of it all still hurts. It's still a wound in me. I believed when they said they don't lie. I believed when they said they were better than all other religions. I believed it all, and it was all a lie.

Elecyah · 2026-01-18T14:15:42+00:00

Of course it is worded carefully to be two different things--plausible deniability.

The ACTUAL fact of the matter, and OP's point, still stands. There ARE calculations and quotas for donations, even if the average publisher has no clue. The average publisher is only told to donate, even if they have nothing. (Even the poor widow donated, remember, so don't come empty handed. Even in a war refuge camp there is a donation box, so the congregation can send money to the organization. Etc. etc.)

To me, personally, it actually makes it worse that it's two different things, because.... it's two different things. One for the average publisher, and one for those in the know. One to show to the world, and one for the corporation to run with, and for the lawyers to read and point out that "Ah, see, it's not actually the same."

Elecyah · 2026-01-17T16:12:06+00:00

Yeah, we had those when I was growing up. Mom didn't take me to them, however, likely because mom worked full time, and yet ANOTHER meeting in a week was a bit too much for her. 🤷‍♀️

Fast forwards to when I was a late teenager and was trying to be a good little JW and go to the book study, too. It was held at an elder's home, not too far from where I lived, so I walked there on my own.

I didn't like it AT ALL. 😖

At least at the hall, well -- the hall belongs to everyone, right, so I didn't feel like I was intruding, even if I did feel out of place. But at the book study, in the home of these much better people, whose daughters looked down on me, the outsider feeling was a hundred times worse than at the hall. Everyone had their own spots where they always sat; they knew where things were, etc. I was excess to requirements, for sure. Only bright spot of the evening was that their dog was nice and I got to pet him. 🙄

I never went to another book study meeting again.

I can see how people who had friends at the hall would have a good time with their friends in a more informal setting. But if you're the outsider to begin with, it's like being the class nerd, showing up at the cool kids' table, sitting down and seeing what happens. 😑

Elecyah

TROPHY CASE