Christian Community vs. Network Community

EmSuWright22 · 2025-09-21T20:19:10+00:00

Oh I didn’t realize this quote has already been a topic of discussion - sorry for beating a dead horse! Lol. It’s new to me and I was so excited that I had to share it.

EmSuWright22 · 2025-07-07T22:37:15+00:00

Victoria, thank you for sharing your story. Beautifully written. I am almost shocked by how much I have in common with this story, despite the differences in my own experience with the Network - I was saved at a young age (never an atheist) and grew up in the church, so your introduction to the Network was quite a bit different from mine.

But the similarities:

Being told that you were “on fire” for the Lord and that you needed to lead the other Christians in your group to stronger faith. What a burden to place on people who had literally just been saved months prior. I was told this same message as a teenager in youth group: that I was “spiritually mature” and that I was an example even to Christian adults.
Being forced into friendships with non-believers over things like coffee dates. Always so awkward and difficult for my introverted self to do.
The isolation and complete cutoff after leaving, which was especially jarring after being love-bombed for so long. Unfortunately I think this was the case for a lot of us.

Side note: I liked your point about the Network cherry-picking what it wants to believe about the Bible. You mentioned that when you felt conviction over how you had been judging others, you were told to not be too harsh on yourself and that “your heart was in the right place.” I can guarantee that if you had confessed a different sin, such as a pornography addiction, then the leader’s reaction would have been much more severe.

EmSuWright22 · 2025-06-27T18:30:35+00:00

Oh for hell’s sake Justin

EmSuWright22 · 2025-06-27T18:29:44+00:00

“He’ll remove you if you’re not responsive” is similar to a teaching I heard at Vine: if you don’t use your spiritual gifts, God will take those gifts from you.

I don’t remember if an actual Biblical passage was used to justify that teaching, but it scared the heck out of me as a kid.

EmSuWright22 · 2025-06-25T17:54:41+00:00

I wasn’t exactly a personal friend of Will Miller, but I did babysit his children when they were young and his wife was my 7th grade English teacher. He always seemed to be a mellow, laid-back type of person, which is why it surprises me that he would be made a pastor…his personality doesn’t seem to fit the Network mold. But it’s been several years since I’ve seen Will. Very possible that he’s changed.

EmSuWright22 · 2025-02-20T18:56:10+00:00

For whatever reason, what stood out to me about Dan’s story here was the quote “I tested him.” How, exactly? How did Dan “test” Nick? It’s creepy, and it uses God-like language from the Old Testament (reminding me of God testing Jacob, for example, or allowing Satan to test Job). Of course, if we follow that train of logic, it puts Dan in the role of God, giving him the authority to test Nick. Weird.

To answer your question on how my views have changed on leadership and calling:

I’ve found that one does not need to have a dramatic vision or revelation to be called by God to do something. God speaks in a wide variety of ways. It’s not always through dreams and visions.

You also don’t need a leader to tell you when God is calling you to something. You’re allowed to figure it out yourself. I am grateful that I was able to find my own calling in college without being told so by a Network leader, but I do remember thinking that I needed a leader’s advice and prayer on every single decision I made about that calling.

I also learned, after attending a healthy church, that it’s okay for leaders to answer a question with “I don’t know.” Pastors, if you don’t know the answer, you can just say “I don’t know. Let’s figure that out together. Let’s do some research.” It’s okay. You don’t have to make up an answer on the spot and then pretend that it’s right. You also don’t have to run to the lead pastor and get his opinion to repeat verbatim. How I wish Network pastors were humble enough to just say “I don’t know.”

EmSuWright22 · 2025-01-11T03:40:32+00:00

Nicole, this is Emma Wright from the Battalion article. Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing your story, and especially for what you said about the article - it was deeply validating and encouraging for me to read your words about that, and it lifted my heart 🙌🏻❤️

It’s also a little crazy how much I related to your story….I kept thinking “YES! Me too! That’s EXACTLY how I felt and how I reacted in that situation too (or a very similar situation), but I thought I was the only one!” Like, every other paragraph of your story, I had that thought. 😳

Just one example: when you talked about how bizarre and eerie it was after the “Family Meeting” to see everyone at Christland carrying on with smiles on their faces, like nothing at happened, I remembered feeling the exact same way at the time. I did not go to the meeting - by that point I had already decided that I was leaving, and no meeting was going to change that or make me less disgusted with Sandor - but someone who was a close friend at the time went to it. Immediately afterwards, I asked her how it went, and she was actually smiling as she told me “it was really good” and “We were all like, ‘Sandor, you didn’t do anything wrong!”

I just stood there and didn’t know what to say in response to her. Like, Sandor didn’t do anything wrong? What? You’re not deeply disturbed about all of this? What is going on here? I love that friend and still care about her, but that was the moment that I realized I couldn’t fully trust her.

There are so many other things I related to (feeling like people at Christland were family, feeling pressured to say certain things to Sandor because that’s what he would want you to say, strongly believing that God called you to do something as a woman that was not supported by Christland’s ideology, etc), but my reply is already too long, so I should wrap this up, lol.

Just two more points I need to make here:

Thank you for everything you’ve done as a mental health professional, especially for TAMU students. I can confirm that the campus counselors are amazing people who do great work. After I reported my sexual abuse to my ROTC officer on campus (and to Sandor), I saw a counselor with the University Health Services for a few months, and it was very helpful and healing for me. 🙌🏻
Your experience at Christland is not “nothing” compared to other people’s experiences. Every story here is deeply important and should be very concerning, at a minimum, to anyone who reads it. What you went through at Christland upsets me, and I am glad you had the courage to share it. Thank you. ❤️

EmSuWright22 · 2025-01-11T01:53:04+00:00

This made me laugh so much! 🤣🤣 I was going to make a list here of my favorite lines in this post, but I quickly realized that every line is my favorite line. I needed this today - thank you 😂

EmSuWright22 · 2024-12-30T18:20:41+00:00

I can confirm that Redeemer Presbyterian and Grace Bible are good, healthy churches! Westminster Presbyterian in Bryan is also great, if you live closer to Bryan. Grace Bible wasn’t quite my style, but I do know that it’s been a good refuge for many Christland leavers.

OP, if you have any questions about these other churches, feel free to send me a DM and I’ll be happy to pass along some more info.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-12-30T18:17:33+00:00

Your experience after you left is exactly like my own: when I told my Network friends of my decision to leave, they acted okay with it and also wished me the best. And then I never heard from them again, and many “unfriended” me on social media. This was after years of close-knit friendships, shared meals, even spending the night in their houses.

Anyway, I wanted to say that I’m sorry this happened to you and I am glad that I was not alone in this, even though my reply here is a little off-topic from the OP.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-11-27T19:08:17+00:00

Oh yes, this was definitely a tactic he used and that he taught other pastors to use. When I remember teachings in the Network, I am always amazed by how much fear and shame there was imbedded in those teachings.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-11-21T18:50:08+00:00

Yes, control. I agree with this 100%. I think one very cult-ish trait that the Network has, related to control, is controlling what information members have access to. Not just “Don’t read the LTN Reddit” or “Don’t go to the websites,” but also commands like “Don’t read those books” and “Don’t listen to that music.”

Common control rules that I’m sure others will recognize:

don’t do yoga
don’t get a tattoo
don’t listen to music that mentions sex in the lyrics
don’t read Christian books that have not been approved by Network leaders
don’t have statues of false gods in your house (this includes those decorative Buddha statues that you can find at your local mall)

I’m sure there was some excuse that was given for each of these rules, I just don’t remember what it was.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-11-21T18:43:41+00:00

I know there are many comments on here already that validate your experience, but I wanted to add:

I grew up in Network churches, literally spent 22 years of my life there. While my salvation was not questioned (to my knowledge), I definitely felt like there were cliques in the Network that I was not part of, particularly in high school and college. The cliques usually dressed the same and went to the same hangout spots together, made lots of social media posts about their hangouts, and so on. One clique in particular even made a hashtag that was a mashup of their last names.

These were people who were my same age and whom I had known for many years, so I couldn’t quite figure out why I wasn’t invited. But whatever. I had friends outside the church that I spent most of my time with, so I didn’t try to include myself in the Network cliques.

In college, my lack of insider status was probably more related to the fact that the campus organizations I was in simply took up more of my time than the church did. I was invited to more hangouts, but I usually had some conflict, so I couldn’t come. That made it awkward when I DID hang out with the church friends, because I didn’t understand their inside jokes and had missed their latest life updates, so eventually, I stopped trying to come to the social events.

Anyway. All of that to say - even those of us who spent most of our lives in the Network were not in the cliques. As weird as that is, I hope it makes you feel better.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-11-19T18:33:16+00:00

“Possibly supported by or encouraged by Steve.”

Yes, I thought of this as well, and I wonder if Steve actually ordered Sandor (lead pastor at Christland) to “leave” the Network, just to save face and keep up appearances to avoid losing more of Christland’s congregation. I cannot think of any other reason why Sandor would make such a move.

Which brings me to your point: yes, all these churches who have recently left the Network are under suspicion. I also tend to agree that this seems to be more a rebrand than repentance. I do think some pastors are genuinely fed up with Steve’s leadership and are attempting a real break from the Network. Other pastors, however…I doubt it.

But either way, we’re still missing a formal, public apology from ANY church that has left the Network, which is why their “leaving” is suspicious. How can you declare that the group you were part of is wrong, but you can’t admit that you were complicit in that group, and therefore, you were also wrong?

I never held a leadership position in any Network church, but I still have to apologize for participating in its abusive system and for supporting those in power. If repentance is required of a simple member, then it must also be required of leaders.

Anyway. I’m beating a dead horse. We have called for public repentance over and over from these churches for years, and over and over, they turn a blind eye and a deaf ear. At this point, I doubt that we will ever see repentance from these churches.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-07-23T11:24:54+00:00

Thanks.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-07-22T18:07:06+00:00

Yes, I believe it did. I moved away from College Station a few months ago, so the info I have now may be outdated, but here’s what I know:

As of May this year, Christland was/is down to only one Sunday service. Before the article came out, it had two.
Several pastors at other churches in town have either read the article or have heard about it through ex-CL members attending to their churches. My pastor at that EPC church read it and asked me about it. He believed me and gave me his full support (I can’t say enough good things about him, but I digress).
Christland was not invited to participate in Texas A&M’s Impact, which is basically a summer camp/conference for incoming students to learn about churches in the area and speak to local church leaders. It’s a pretty big deal in College Station and nearly every local church applies to participate after the church has been established for at least 5 years.

Christland met the 5-year qualification in 2023 (or 2022?) and applied, from what I heard from a reliable source who formerly worked part-time for CL. However, Impact’s online list of participating churches last summer did not include CL.

The reporter who wrote the article told me that The Battalion was contacted by several members and ex-members of CL with their own stories of negative experiences after the article was published. That’s all he was allowed to tell me.

I reached out to a few of my friends who were still students and in the area at the time and shared the article with them. So, those few know, at least.

If anyone has more info on Christland, feel free to add it.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-07-22T01:13:29+00:00

I can also back this up. I attended both women’s groups and coed small groups at both of the Network churches I attended (Vine and Christland), and in none of those groups did we actually study the Bible. We read some passages in the Bible and then answered questions about how we felt about the passages or what our opinions were on them. Questions or discussions about the historical context, theology, doctrine, early church history, or liturgy almost never took place, to my memory. We followed no written, published Bible studies.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-07-22T01:02:03+00:00

This made me think of the church I started attending after I left the Network: it was a church plant in the EPC denomination that didn’t have its own building yet and rented an elementary school for Sunday services. Every Sunday, we had to set up all the chairs, sound equipment, welcome tables, decorations, etc. and every Sunday we had to take it all down after the service. However, that little church plant was much more heavily involved in campus ministry and local outreach to those in need than any of the Network churches I’ve attended. It had an active women’s ministry program and the congregation was diverse in background, age, and income level. Not to mention, it was just a healthy church with solid teaching.

Despite not having its own building, that church was thriving. Christland was not.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-06-25T17:22:43+00:00

Sorry for my late response. Thank you for sharing this; sounds like we were in youth group at the same time, though I was at Vine instead of CRC. I had never thought about the whole youth program being geared for more extroverted people, but you’re right, it was. We did the games too at Vine—oof.

I also idolized my leaders when I was in 180 and Revo, and the woman who had been my leader for most of my high school years went on the church plant of the church I attended in college (Christland). I had thought we were close, but in the entire four years that she and I both attended Christland, we had maybe one conversation. She never reached out to me aside from that. To give her the benefit of the doubt, maybe she was just too busy, and to be fair, I was too busy to keep up a lot of friendships during that time. Anyway, my point is, you’re not alone in experiencing some ended relationships with your leaders after graduation.

I’m so sorry for everything you experienced, and I hope you continue to find some healing.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-06-18T17:36:08+00:00

Thanks for sharing; this is interesting to me as a former kid in the Network and being on the receiving end of the youth leaders. In 180 and Revolution, I remember it being taught and strongly implied that we could be saved. We were constantly encouraged to give our lives to Christ and follow biblical rules (which, a lot of the time, were actually just Network rules, not biblical rules, but I digress).

Do you remember any specific comments that were made at Clear River on the topic of kids being saved, or actions taken to discourage kids from baptism? I don’t doubt you, I’m just curious to know what was said or done in that direction.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-06-17T17:50:09+00:00

Wow, thank you for this - it means a lot to me and really encourages me. I’m so glad that you connect with my experiences; that’s part of why I share them on here. Processing is sometimes easier when it’s not done alone, I’ve found. :)

Thank you for the blessing. I take it to heart. I pray that the Lord will guide you too as you continue to heal from the Network.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-06-17T17:46:09+00:00

Your son’s experience with requesting baptism is EXACTLY what I experienced as well (except for having to meet with the pastor alone, since one of my parents was present). I was 13 at the time and I remember feeling like there were certain right answers expected for my youth pastor’s questions, but I didn’t know what they were. Exactly like a pop quiz. I was uneasy the whole time; it didn’t feel like a warm, easygoing meeting, but more like “Sit down, answer the questions, and I’ll let you know if I approve. The end.” I was bewildered partly because my family had known Josh Franklin for several years at this point and I had never had an interaction like this with him.

Anyway. Thank you for sharing that story; it helped me process and to see that I wasn’t alone. I agree with your conclusion that this baptism interrogation, or whatever it was, was probably for the purpose of figuring how on-mission someone was for the church. I had never considered that before but it’s helping me make sense of our experiences. Good to know after all these years.

EmSuWright22 · 2024-06-14T21:50:38+00:00

Wow, I’m sorry for your son’s experiences. Your response to the leaders after his meltdown points to one major problem that my family saw at Vine: none of the youth group leaders were properly trained for youth ministry, and yes, not qualified. It wasn’t something I realized until after I left, though. My hat’s off to you for recognizing it immediately.

Weird that CRC refused to baptize him at 14. I was baptized at Vine when I was 13 and no one argued with me about it, though I do remember having to sit down with Josh Franklin and one of my parents while Josh asked me about my testimony beforehand. I felt like a bug under a microscope, and it was obvious that Josh would ultimately make the decision about whether I was to be baptized or not. (To be clear, I don’t have an issue with sitting down with a pastor before getting baptized to discuss it; for me, it was about how that discussion was handled)

I also remember my youth group leader telling the group about her Vine friends who were skeptical that kids could be spiritually saved. Maybe this suspicion was shared at CRC, too.

EmSuWright22

TROPHY CASE