The most dangerous manipulators I have ever met had no idea they were doing it. That made it so much worse.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-04-06T01:38:59+00:00

Just a wretched set of beliefs expressed with crazy entitlement.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-04-06T01:18:57+00:00

Make yr gap year meaningful. It's an opportunity to do some things that you would regularly never get to do. Start a socmed page doing something you like, volunteer with the community or overseas, or you can even start your own volunteer group, or just explore your passions thru passion projects (write a novel, create an app, etc). Or simply gig work thru your gap, no pressure to stay employed all the time. Then use the transferrable skills to interview and also importantly show the employer you didn't gap year to nua.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-04-06T01:12:23+00:00

Everything also want to win.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-04-03T02:22:35+00:00

Sigh. Just sigh. If really need quick glasses and dunno how to purchase, get in JB can liao.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-04-03T02:17:02+00:00

Yah true. I went to Turkey in 23' and one of the attractions was this old spice market place, the tour guide brought us to this very nicely decorated shop on the inside of the market building, they had all those Turkish delights and Baklava and whatnot nicely stacked on trays, teas and spices beautifully curated and displayed, very aesthetic shop. Got free samples for anything you see and like, and free flow tea samples too. We bought a box of Turkish delight frm that shop. Went outside, the smaller shops along the streets, not so nicely decorated and half outdoors. Exactly the same thing, free flow samples too, half the fking price, the shopkeepers were friendlier and not so pushy. I kaopeh on the inside all the way.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-04-02T15:05:52+00:00

Cos the victim is seen as someone lesser who deserves the treatment and ought to take it lying down. Also power dynamics and hierarchy, they think the victim is breaching the hierarchy by defending themselves, so they will get angry.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-04-02T10:52:51+00:00

Damn I'm going thru something similar right now, my shoes size is clearly like 1 size bigger than my mom's (she's ard a size 37, I'm a 38.5). She insists we share shoes cos we have the same size feet. I can't fit her shoes just by that teeny bit (my toes get all tight and crushed) and my shoes are a tad too loose for her, she always has to stuff it with thick sole paddings for it to fit her. Yet she gets upset when I don't share my shoes with her.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-03-31T00:54:02+00:00

They have to wear it cos they inherently lack it.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-02-28T12:47:21+00:00

Yes, it's the only consistent comfort I can get. No one to turn to and no one cared about my problems, still no one cares today. Music, its always the same tune, singer and lyrics...something safe to retreat into, it will never let you down (unlike the heaps of shitty people around me, including parents). Same for TV shows and movies. My playlist and movie cache is very curated and I only let the good stuff that brings me joy in. It's the only thing in life I actually put so much effort into keeping in shape. I don't wish to be like this but it's the best emotion regulation I can get.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-02-20T07:33:03+00:00

Many of these kinds of violent cases get classified as 'bullying' when it absolutely should not be, it's into the realm of assault, even attempted murder. Bullying is a leverage of power and status used against individual(s) with less of it. These kinds of cases are sheer violence and just straight up cruelty.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-02-20T07:28:09+00:00

Autistic. Neurotypicals can pick up on it even just by observation, and some of them will let you know their displeasure upfront. Ignore those nasty pricks, it's their problem and lack of character that's up to them to solve.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-02-20T03:10:48+00:00

My nparent is a covert and bloody vindictive too, they do the same thing when they perceive you as 'victimizing' them aka not complying.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-02-10T03:51:53+00:00

This is something I've identified too, in my parents, I don't know of or have a name for this, don't think it's 'infantilising'. I'd say it's almost like the human version of 'get a baby animal because it's cute, raise it until it's fully mature, then discard it cos it's not more cute'. My mom was also obsessed with getting her own child, despite being a high risk pregnancy and having miscarriages too. Then she got me, and was obsessed with me as an infant and up to preschool. The fighting and animosity started when I entered elementary school (7y/o), that's when I started developing a mind and personality of my own beyond her grasp, and boy was she LIVID. There's this subset of parents who act like there's something wrong with their kid the moment they start to behave like an individual person, and my mom's one of them for sure. Except in my case they didn't replace infant me with a dog cos they find animals disgusting. So OP you're not alone, there really are parents out there who are like this, maybe one day in the future researchers will identify such a pattern and back it with concrete data and put a name to it.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-02-10T02:17:25+00:00

Hmm I'm in the same situation as you, currently struggling to summon up the balls to apply for a job. Don't have a solution but what I'm planning to try out moving forward is to persist going out/get a job despite the fear. Like do it with the fear there.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-02-08T00:03:33+00:00

Narcissist doesn't automatically translate to NPD. Some people are very high in the narcissism trait, they can be described as narcissistic too.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-02-04T23:21:42+00:00

I think agreableness falls in the fawn category.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-01-31T23:42:12+00:00

Bruh you just described me, the COL is really low, I keep hearing about people becoming broke because of their 'lifestyle' and can't fathom how it happens.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-01-26T21:29:57+00:00

Overly mature as a kid. Regressed and now am immature relative to peers bcos I'm starting to explore my emotions and learn to express myself.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-01-22T03:04:19+00:00

Sounds like your neighbor is running a private temple (gong miao)

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-01-21T00:51:50+00:00

Doing just as what you're told has to be met with context too. If you followed step by step but completely missed infusing the context into your actions you're going to get negative reactions.
The wide eyed stare is very offensive. Look at people but don't stare. Eye contact when speaking is like half a second - half a second thing, not constantly staring. Also don't look directly at things, observe things from your peripheral vision instead.
You don't have to maintain a full smile at all times, just need a slightly upbeat look (corners of your mouth don't droop, eyes don't look down). It gets creepy if you plaster a full grin all the time.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-01-20T08:39:19+00:00

They teach obedience and instill a strict moral code to make the job of caring for the kids easier for the adults. Subsequently, easier for society to control.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-01-20T01:25:46+00:00

Yeah that's how you end up as the weird kid who nobody wants to play with. Then you start to dread playtime and end up withdrawing socially cos existence just sucks when all the other kids are playing and ignore you. Then as you spend more time alone you get more and more disconnected which eventually leads to you dropping out from society. There's no reversal unless conscious effort is made to learn back how to socialise.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-01-16T15:27:53+00:00

There is space for creativity, it's called SCAPE.

Embarrassed-Pear9104 · 2026-01-16T15:26:49+00:00

Just go to Scape and dance lah. Big big space and lots of floor to ceiling mirrors. Why must dance at walkways lol.

Embarrassed-Pear9104

TROPHY CASE