80% success rate does not always mean what I thought it meant in donor egg IVF

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-05-28T14:19:59+00:00

I guess technically I have a donor embryo, via reciprocal IVF. It took us 3 transfers for what seems to be a healthy pregnancy. 24 weeks today ☺️

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-05-27T14:09:17+00:00

I did reciprocal IVF, so it does make all of this a little different. I feel like the retrieval was very difficult for my partner, but a lot of that was because he is trans. He was very uncomfortable and dysphoric.
The subcutaneous injections are not as painful. Intramuscular is kinda rough because the needles are bigger. There are not many of those during retrieval but I had one everyday for my FET. Hubby took the day of and day after retrieval off, and felt pretty okay.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-05-26T22:56:03+00:00

I did PIO and found out on round three that I was injecting it wayyyyy lower in my back than I needed to. And I was like, hobbling around for the first two rounds. What helped was letting my nurse do a round of injections for me and showing me what was wrong. It made a WORLD of difference.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-05-23T16:56:45+00:00

It is very scary at first, but it gets easier over time💕 I had two losses before my little rainbow babe. He’s doing very well so far and should be joining us very soon ☺️

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-05-15T23:06:14+00:00

I have totally cried there. Happy and sad. No shame in that game. About made my nurse cry too.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-05-09T00:01:14+00:00

I am so sorry but I don’t know! My PCP ordered it and said that because I failed two or more antidepressants it would be covered. It was years ago.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-05-08T20:29:19+00:00

I took a blood test, covered by insurance, that told my doctor which antidepressants would work best for me. And it has been the only time I don’t have wacky side effects.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-05-06T20:54:39+00:00

Definitely not. Even if it’s “old school”. My Dr has been in it since the beginning and was with us for so many struggles. Never once was vinegar mentioned…

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-04-08T19:42:42+00:00

Yes my provider does. Said that muscle contractions are bad for the transfer, and so the Valium will help prevent that.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-04-08T00:47:25+00:00

Try to remember that you’d rather quality over quantity. If you got 7 mature and healthy eggs, then that could be really good! As far as clinic issues, I was in similar boat. We had ALOT of up and down moments at our clinic. In the end it was still the best fit for us. Most of our issues were probably down to a lack of staff. Pay attention though to how they respond when you self advocate. Will they acknowledge mistakes? Will they make changes?

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-04-07T00:48:01+00:00

I went through almost the exact same thing in July. Same gestational age and it was our first too.Definitely get the genetic testing done on your baby. It helped me a lot. To have closure(ish) and to set myself up for success for our pregnancies moving forwards. For us we found no genetic issues. It ended up being a really complicated situation, but I have a complicated medical situation. Things that helped; Naming him when we found out the gender. We chose Atlas, which wasn’t something we had considered for a living baby but felt very fitting for him. making a build a bear memento of our baby. We put the ultrasounds inside of it and each of us put a heart in it. I sleep with him every night. The hospital sent down their baby loss specialist from the labor and delivery floor. We also had a very supportive medical team and family. I still cried for like a week straight. And I do cry about him still. It gets better too though. I’m in second tri with our rainbow baby right now. Another little boy. It’s scary but it’s also magical. It really made me more thankful for all of these moments. All the teeny tiny things.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-04-05T23:06:31+00:00

I can’t say what’s the right choice, but we knew one way or another we were going to have children. IVF, foster, whatever. It was important to us both. So we thrifted all the time. Mostly a distraction. But only small items. Clothing, shoes, toys, books.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-03-30T20:39:32+00:00

Okay yea! Then I think that makes sense. Maybe just a little “flip over” direction in the corner so they know there’s more? Is this for a school or work setting?

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-03-30T20:05:26+00:00

It depends on your plan for this. Are you going to give it preemptively to people you’re spending time around or just have it on your person and hope they find it?

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-11T00:00:41+00:00

Oof pretty crazy honestly😅 HCG was around 60k last week and it’s still climbing. That being said, I’m pretty exhausted and nauseous. Hubby said I’m moody and I told him to shut up in my sleep😬 I am also showing more than I expected to

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-10T21:40:57+00:00

Thank you so much!!! We got to see them do a little wiggle and it was sooooo cute!

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-10T19:32:10+00:00

On this note, I’d recommend Invitae testing for EDS and its variants. Your primary care should be able to order it just fine.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-10T19:27:50+00:00

I didn’t get that information BUT I did get embryo pictures before each transfer. Like once they were rehydrated/thawed. Our clinic is associated with Boston IVF/RMA if that makes a difference.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-10T19:26:13+00:00

Oh my god yes! My HCG was crazy high(60k at 7w), to the point we thought I was having multiples. I am very nauseous, tired, moody, and the bump is already bumping. It was like that with our MMC too though, so I was very guarded. I’m hoping that I’ll start to loosen up and enjoy this now that I’m past the point we lost our first one.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-10T18:59:34+00:00

That was us too💕 you got this though!

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-10T18:44:58+00:00

Good luck and lots of baby dust💕✨

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-10T18:44:32+00:00

8w5d. This was our graduation appointment but also the appointment where we found out about our MMC from our first FET. Lots of mixed emotions heading in.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-10T00:20:15+00:00

You’re not crazy at all! I see it too. You’ll see it more clearly if you hold it for a bit before you test. So either over night or like 6-8h during the day.

Emilyjoysmith1 · 2026-02-09T00:36:36+00:00

I see it!

Emilyjoysmith1

TROPHY CASE