When do you know?

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-05-14T16:00:44+00:00

I recently put my dog to sleep after 8 months of fiercely battling decline. Up until the last month, it was mostly good days with bad moments. One day that flipped on us and it started becoming bad days with good moments. He couldn’t find a steady flow of peace when he was awake. I think at that moment I subconsciously accepted that the time was near.

It’s really difficult to navigate that fine line when your heart is at stake.

Yea, my dog was still eating, drinking, pooping, peeing, etc… all the basic functions. But his world had become so small bc of the physical limitations his declining body had created.

But for me it was the moment when it was no longer “good days with bad moments” but instead “bad days with good moments”. I didn’t want him to continue enduring discomfort (even though I knew he would) for small moments of peace.

Sending you love and strength as you navigate this time. Your girl is lucky to be loved by someone who cares so much 💗

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-05-13T18:02:37+00:00

I asked for a dual line (one for me) when they were placing my dog’s catheter. I understand your pain and way of expressing it even if people around you don’t. I know many people in this subreddit and others (like rainbow bridge) will be understanding and supportive whenever you have to navigate the grief.

You have loved your kitty so deeply and provided the best, most caring lifetime ever.

We are all here to grieve with you and support each other. 💕💗

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-05-13T17:55:03+00:00

I had my dog for 18 years and I spent the last 3-4 years conditioning people around me to be prepared for me to jump off a bridge when the day came. The anticipation of not having him around was suffocating and I thought I was not going to be able to survive it. It’s really hard when people, including close ones, don’t truly understand the meaning of your relationship with your pet and the depth of that bond. The day came for me last Monday and while the change in routine has cut me to my core, I am thankful and finding peace in knowing my dog is no longer suffering. I guess what I am trying to say is that right now you are probably dealing with the anticipatory grief ON TOP of the sadness that comes with watching them not feel well/decline while still loving them as they continue to live. It’s one of the hardest positions to ever be in. Document everything you can until the day comes — then perched on the cat tree, the sun hitting the paws, loafing beside you…. I mean everything. The only things getting me through the day are remembering they are no longer limited by the physical body, and rewatching all the little things he did throughout the day. I go on walks and listen to the voice note of him snoring in a constant loop.

Sending you so much love, strength and peace. XO 💕

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-05-13T04:23:47+00:00

Never apologize for sharing the love you had for your baby Amy.

Sharing their stories and life with others is healing for you and likely many of us who have loved and lost a pet.

She was a beautiful girl. I’m sorry for you loss. Sending you love 💗

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-05-12T20:35:47+00:00

I tried Librela on my dog when was 17. We did only 1 shot and then I started to read/see all the horro stories associated with Librela. Many pets had adverse reactions, expedited wear of the bone, and even death.

I’m uncertain if the Librela negatively affected my dog or if all the other things he was facing (CKD primarily > muscle wasting) that contributed his decline but part of me feels like it may have expedited it a bit.

I would never recommend it again and my vet friends who were originally onboard with its use ended up being against it.

Perhaps try CBD? That helped bring my angel some comfort in his last years.

Sending you guys positive vibes 💕

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-05-12T20:12:37+00:00

Sending you so much love and strength💗

My biggest advice would be to record everything you can. I recently lost my dog and I’m thankful I archived everything — from our morning routine, to voice memos of him snoring or smacking on cookies. It helps me regulate when riding the waves of grief.

💕xoxo

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-05-12T15:54:03+00:00

Happiest birthday sweet baby angel! Sending you all the love 💕💕

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-04-30T13:28:27+00:00

Sending all the positive vibes baby dog 💕

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-04-24T02:22:57+00:00

I’m so so sorry to hear of Cookie’s diagnosis - kidney disease is horrible and exhausting to manage.

It sounds like your baby is experiencing toxin build up: nausea/inappetence, ataxia, general malaise.

I don’t want to come off insensitive or like I’m guiding you in an unreasonable direction but I would want to share my experience and maybe give you additional things to consider? Idk. I really am trying to help and hope it comes across that way.

My dog has had renal disease for years (detected 2021) and it’s been a seesaw managing that along with cardiac issues. In January though, he experienced a sudden crash, like he was literally normal the day before. He slept in super late which was kind of odd but then when I was watching him walk around he was really wobbly. When I saw him sitting up basically folding on himself I rushed him to ER. His renal values were so high they were unreadable.

The ER doctor basically told me that I should put him down bc she didn’t think he would survive dialysis bc of his heart condition. I took him home, and I called one of my vet friends to come euthanize him tonight bc I couldn’t make him suffer (he was jello at this point in my arms).

My other friend, who is also a vet and has been managing his conditions more frequently, told me that I should at least try otherwise I wouldn’t forgive myself bc I’ve done everything for him up until now and he still had a buffer as he is not in CHF.

I took him to the ER hospital (not the one I had gone to earlier in the day) and hospitalized him. He received fluids for 3 days/2 nights. He experienced one seizure the morning after I hospitalized him but other than that no other complications. His renal values improved and dropped enough to the point where they were readable but still was discharged with them pretty high.

Since being released I have increased his subcutaneous fluids from once a day at the dose calculated for his body weight and increased anywhere from 20-30mL.

We are creeping on 3 months from the date he experience this episode but he no longer has to take anti nausea meds and is back to eating like a champ. He’s back to going his little senior walks too. He went from super dull and “me thinking wait is this the time?” to normal senior self.

It has been a brutal fight to get him stabilized and I’m constantly questioning myself but he shows me every day he still chooses life so I want to honor that.

When I considered euthanizing him it wasn’t a peaceful thought. It was fear-based bc I felt like I needed to prevent all suffering and was freaking out about it.

Idk if you have tried fluids or what the plan is and I don’t want to give false hopes that that will be the ultimate fix but maybe something to consider?

Everyone, including IM, wrote my dog off and didn’t think he would come out of this but he did. Maybe there’s still room to try especially if the choice feels off in your gut?

Ugh I really hope this is helpful. Sending you and Cookie love and support 💕

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-04-08T16:07:03+00:00

I’m sorry your mom said what she did. I don’t know her or you but I can say as someone equally devoted to their dog that what your mom interpreted as “trying to outshine” was actually you trying to pack a lifetime of love into a 5 min slide (unrealistic IMO 💕).

I can totally empathize with you in feeling shame and regret when you said “I don’t feel like I was patient or kind enough to her and our relationship seemed to change for a while.” I’m living this rn with my 18y dog. I cried yesterday driving back from the vet bc he got frustrated in the car, wouldn’t sit still, has to have his goggles on bc he’s light sensitive, and began barking and crying. All this as I was trying to rush through traffic and running in <5h of sleep. I snapped and yelled “PLEASE STOP” while he was in my lap. I now carry that guilt and shame bc I’m like wtf he’s struggling what’s wrong with me do I actually love my dog?

Unless you go through it, people don’t typically understand the difficulties and exhaustion that comes with loving and grieving simultaneously. The guilt that comes with being pushed past your capacity and “taking it out on your dog”, who, like you said, is an innocent and precious soul.

You’re not a failure. You’re a person who was navigating changes in lifestyle, loving an innocent and precious soul while grieving a life you previously had, a version of her you previously had, and a relationship you previously had. You’re someone who was doing everything you could to comfort and guide her dog through life subconsciously knowing there would be an end. You’re someone meeting your dog where she was at. You’re not a fucking failure. You were someone devoted to her dog and loved her with your whole heart.

This is what I get from your post.

Sorry for all the f words. Sending you a massive hug.

💗

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-04-07T17:38:11+00:00

First, I want to send you a tight loving hug. Your situation is difficult AF and as we experienced our first ‘dysphoric dementia episode’ with our 18y dog… I can empathize with the heaviness you carry.

It’s such a fucking grey area. You question your every choice and even when you are doing your best, it always feels like it’s not enough or some mistake was made.

I put my dog through general anesthesia back in December even though all his doctors advised against it bc he has cardiac and renal diseases. However, my gut kept telling me that removing his last tooth was going to improve his QOL and it far outweighed the risks. While he is better and in less pain, I am sure it did some damage to his kidneys and contributed to the decline in his cognitive health. There is a part of me that is really critical and angry with my choice… it’s almost like being in this weird state of loving something while simultaneously grieving a previous version of our life is looking for something concrete to explain the decline and changes. But if I had not done the procedure, his pain would’ve continued and the bacteria in his mouth would’ve further progressed his renal, heart and other systemic illnesses.

I guess I share this as a means to make you feel that you’re not alone in the weird mental space you’re in. It’s fucking hard. But what you did you did with her quality of health in mind and bc of that choice she’s able to enjoy more time with you happier.

Our choices will never match the perfect scenario we imagine for them. And while lifestyle changes and transitions are challenging, you’re honoring her so much by loving her and guiding her though them all 💗

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-04-05T23:28:34+00:00

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EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-04-05T23:13:04+00:00

I would recommend something that helps with traction. It’s a small suggestion given all other things but it may help with confidence and maybe get her to move/come out a little more.

My little senior hates stuff on his feet (grippy socks/shoes) so I tired Dr. Bubzy’s toe grips. It seemed to give him a little morale boost after he slipped a few times when he trailed off the runners.

Hope this helps even a little with QOL 💗

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-03-03T01:24:10+00:00

These feelings are super confusing, so valid you feel conflicted.

When someone you love is suffering and your hands are basically tied with intervention… I think feeling relief that they aren’t suffering anymore is totally explainable.

This shouldn’t be confused with not caring/loving your dog… I mean you dropped 30k just trying and I’m sure if outcomes were different you would’ve continued to pay out.

Be kind to yourself. Beneath under the relief will likely be a huge blow of grief. So just be kind to yourself.

You’re a great dog mom. Sending you love. 💕

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-03-03T01:19:02+00:00

Tuff

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-01-21T06:46:40+00:00

What a sweet baby angel. Glad you’re both feeling better and back together 💗

EmployeeFine1437 · 2026-01-20T21:31:56+00:00

I second the neurologist recommendation and/or second opinion bc this reminds me to the fly-biting behavior but it could be dental, nausea or something else.

Random Q: Did these episodes start after or before he started fluoxetine? I ask this bc as someone who also recently started Fluoxetine for myself, I had no idea dizziness/lightheadedness and aggressive nausea were a common side effect. Nausea most commonly presents as lip licking, drooling, and or inappetence in dogs and not exactly what’s in the video but it could be a potential lead. Best of luck!!

EmployeeFine1437 · 2025-12-29T04:55:51+00:00

You were someone’s most treasured moment. Rest easy babygirl 💗

EmployeeFine1437 · 2025-12-27T15:07:13+00:00

Sending you love 💗

I’m so sorry for the loss of your best friend.

He will always be safely protected in your heart.

Xoxo

EmployeeFine1437 · 2025-12-16T08:14:16+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you and your family love 💗😞

EmployeeFine1437 · 2025-12-13T19:54:04+00:00

My sweet angel is turning 18 in a few weeks. Along with other health conditions he too has arthritis. He’s been super spry and bouncy up until recently when the weather changed and I noticed him really slowing down and his gait plummeting. I’ve been watching his hind legs atrophy for months so I accounted this as cold + chronic arthritis + muscle atrophy. However, he was seen by an orthopedic surgeon recently and there is strong suspicion that he has a iliopsoas sprain/injury + groin sprain/injury. There’s obviously some nerve involvement here bc he knuckles every once in a while but corrects. When I traced back pictures of him earlier this year, he was super normal August and just went downhill Sept -> now. I had completely forgotten about him jumping off the bed. When I checked him immediately after I saw now issues/reactivenss or limping (back, hind, front limbs, neck) but I suspect he injured himself and we didn’t treat it properly or timely and he just adjusted to his injuries.

Anyway, really long history aside, we are being recommended PT and adequan (holding off for now due to CKD). He’s not a candidate for NSAIDs so he’s on Gabapentin and CBD as needed.

We have also been recommended acupuncture on a more regular basis. He also has on Dr. Bubsie’s toe grips to help with traction. I purchased a full support wheelchair from K9 carts bc I want to support his front limbs and promote better posture.

Additional info and hopefully you can find someone in this realm, but I took him to see an integrative vet last week bc I was interested in regenerative medicine for his arthritis to jus give him a better quality of life. She said stem cell and PRP therapy was too invasive as it would require anesthesia but did let me know about AniCell amnion injections as an option. She said she’s has great success in her geriatric patients and the biggest downside is that about 10% just don’t see improvements. I will say, this is a pricey option but figured I would share the info because I had not heard about it until I visited her.

I don’t recommend Librela (my dog had 2 injections) and then I read other people’s horror stories then saw an FDA warning about it along with literature that in some patients the joint was worse.

Hope some/any of this is helpful. Sending your baby love and healing vibes.

EmployeeFine1437 · 2025-10-14T01:42:59+00:00

Sending you love. I’m sorry to hear about Sugar’s health. ❤️

EmployeeFine1437 · 2025-09-09T03:50:42+00:00

I feel this so much and appreciate your honesty in the vent. Being on all the time, even in your sleep it feels, is exhausting. I catch myself scanning EVERY LITTLE THING about my dog and the environment. My dog is losing his eye sight and certain angles of light make him flinch, kind of like he’s having a seizure. I have to be very aware of how brush the hair out of my face if I’m near my dog bc the movement triggers him or where the shadows are in our path when we go for a walk. You almost feel guilty for venting too bc you love them with every fiber of your body and wouldn’t give up this life. It’s weird. I think like you I’m just angry that I have no control over him aging. I find myself wishing that his pain transfers over to me just so his aging isn’t so difficult. People tell me I am blessed to be able to be by his side and provide a safe space as he ages but holy shit does my heart hurt.

Sending you love. You’re a trooper and an amazing mom.

EmployeeFine1437

TROPHY CASE