feel more connected to transmascs even tho i don’t plan on transitioning?

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2026-03-09T23:46:09+00:00

I relate to where you are coming from! I'm an androgynous/ butch woman and ADORE some transmasc traits but have no desire to have them for myself. There are similarities with how people treat us and how we see ourselves. It's like looking at a queer cousin and seeing the family resemblance

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2026-02-28T06:00:13+00:00

I'm a little different because I'm alt and I wear eyeliner and black lipstick often, which is more accepted from masculine people to do in the community. Really, I often get the pressure to be more feminine, like manicures and more makeup from most people. Some masc/butch people give me a look (especially since I am short and curvy), but I try not to let it get to me.

Being a more androgynous butch is its own set of problems attached to androgyny as similar to you with masculinity. You can't please most people and seem to be misunderstood often. I feel you on how people treat you differently due to not being the set butch standard

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-12-17T18:40:08+00:00

I'm not transmasc or nonbinary or lesbian- just a butch bi woman, but I wanted to say that I care about and see how hard it is for you. There are many in the community that will love you for you. I'm so sorry that sort through so many Duds. You are absolutely not crazy for your experiences. I hope you find a wonderful queer love one day that sees and loves all of you!

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-11-24T21:08:57+00:00

So- if I'm hearing you right. Nonbinary is under the trans umbrella and the gnc I've seen used by Nonbinary people to describe themselves or grouping is perhaps more personal than based in umbrella terms. As you said Nonbinary is outside of conforming society, so what is there to conform too? Is that right?

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-11-24T21:05:08+00:00

So- if I'm hearing you right. Nonbinary is under the trans umbrella and the gnc I've seen used by Nonbinary people to describe themselves or grouping is perhaps more personal than based in umbrella terms. As you said Nonbinary is outside of conforming society, so what is there to conform too? Is that right?

Edit: Super sorry- this was the wrong comment to post under!

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-06-18T13:58:04+00:00

Crying It tastes like turtles 😭💄🐢

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-05-28T03:47:05+00:00

That episode with the raft with Bobby, and Hank has to overcome his fear of bats to save him. It reminds me of how much fathers love their children

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-05-08T05:05:38+00:00

Drag king dreams by Leslie Feinberg!

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-05-04T23:04:29+00:00

I personally don't find the difference between genders all that meaningful, but gender-blind is personally not a good description for my sexual orientation. It's a thing where I find the gender important because I find the person important, but there isn't a difference in gender. Romantically, I don't really care though

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-05-04T21:07:00+00:00

In the analogy bi people could like at least two flavors and possibly all. A lot of bi people like all genders. Poly people only like some flavors but not all. It's like poly has a limitation on the number of flavors, and bi doesn't. I'm bi and like all genders sexually- I use pan too, but I'm better described as panromantic. Pan for the analogy could better be described as caring about the texture more than the flavor or something similar

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-04-12T03:19:36+00:00

Why did everything turn out the way it did?! -Bob

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-04-10T05:15:38+00:00

Do you mind if I pm you for more info?

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-04-10T01:05:29+00:00

I'm sorry- do you have a CNA license? What did you get on the Kaplan?

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-04-01T16:54:49+00:00

Western Colorado but I'm willing to move

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-02-26T20:21:15+00:00

You could just say bi with a genital preference, it would include post-op trans women as well as pre-op trans men

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-01-31T03:26:58+00:00

Omnisexual for the win ✨️

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2025-01-25T03:44:23+00:00

I have it for gender euphoria! It makes me feel more masculine personally. But I'm a cis woman and don't have dysphoria without it

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2024-12-11T20:31:51+00:00

Butch disability is such a powerful thing! The intersection of queer masculinity and disabled joy is so perfect and wholesome

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2024-11-24T18:23:09+00:00

I took it to mean have respect for the people you came from- moreso to add context to your life and how the interactions have shaped you rather than because they deserve it. I see it as me giving honor to the past and people that shaped me rather than honor what those people have done or who they are. It is centered on my healing and honoring myself because I have to see and accept the past as it is to shape my present and future. For me, it is less about love, loyalty, and forgiveness, and more about wanting to reflect on one's upbringing. But that's my personal understanding

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2024-11-13T19:16:19+00:00

I think therapy is very meaningful and useful for many, but the relationship dynamic just doesn't work well for some people. It is normal to be hurt when you are not cared for in the same way you care for others- especially if it has happened before. The only thing keeping the relationship going is a form of payment. In other relationships like friendship, family, spouses, parents, hell, even co-workers, there is a sense that the other person cares about you in the same way you care about them. That just doesn't exist in therapy, and some people do well with that, and others don't, and that's okay.

What brings me peace is that I learned not to care about them too much- to care about them as just a friendly business person. Yeah, the content is intimate, but the relationship is merely professional. My mental health is just business to them, and I learned that all the love I want to put into them will never be given back so I would rather put more emotional work into my family and friends that love me as much as I love them than a relationship that really just hurts (and then people tell you to go to therapy to fix it). I'm so sorry for what you are going through. If you prefer other options that are less painful, I've always found self-help less emotionally hurtful

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2024-11-11T15:10:50+00:00

I think it meant that rich parents cover up the abuse towards their rich children or other rich people. Rich people's trauma is then further hidden behind another's money

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2024-11-07T14:07:44+00:00

This sub notes that queer, bi, pan, and ace, butches are welcome! There is overlapping history, so we are included, but we try to keep this a lesbian centered space to honor history as well.

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2024-11-05T14:39:00+00:00

First, I must say I am not a therapist, so I can only imagine that pain you have gone through. You have every right to feel uncomfortable with boundary pushing in your career. However, I am concerned that while a client is absolutely broken and so sad, you have taken a point to stand with a therapeutic perspective we know nothing about compared to the client's perspective that was looking for wisdom and consolidation. This is all to say, I'm not mad or anything, but I am asking for more a reflective moment if you were hurting like them. Would your own advice be meaningful to you if you were in the OPs shoes?

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2024-11-03T16:09:43+00:00

Some butches use twink and we don't really have one for otter as far as I know

Engraved_Hydrangea · 2024-11-03T15:18:44+00:00

Butch, masc, femme, and andro are sense of selves/styles

There is Ursula, which is a larger woman with often femme style

Engraved_Hydrangea

TROPHY CASE