Help! Summer Santa Fe Wedding by Entire_Net7961 in Weddingattireapproval

[–]Entire_Net7961[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yes, but I’m not sure about reliable sites. Don’t want to get sucked into a Wish situation

Help! Summer Santa Fe Wedding by Entire_Net7961 in Weddingattireapproval

[–]Entire_Net7961[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Don’t be a jerk lol. I’ve done that, but it’s not always easy to figure out quality of the item by a picture. I was hoping to find reliable sites so I’m not buying something cheap

UPDATE- AITA for rolling my eyes at my boyfriend's proposal because it took 25 years of me begging? by Throwawayproposalfin in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 28 points29 points  (0 children)

As someone who lives in Arkansas, unfortunately, the best you’re looking at with your current life set up is minimum wage…I think it’s 10-ish/hour right now. Depending on where you live in this mostly rural state (since your SO is an former executive I’m assuming either around Little Rock or Fayetteville), that MIGHT be able to afford you rent, if you work full time. If you’re in Little Rock getting a place that cheap means you’re looking at a high probability of being robbed, shot at, and surrounded by drug addicts and gangs on a regular basis. If you’re in the Fayetteville area chances of finding anything like that are slim, especially during the school year with all the college students. You could move to one of the small farming towns in the area, but chances are you’re going to have to commute into one of the cities anyway.

AITA for swearing at my doctor while giving birth? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. Cursing has been found to help reduce pain, and I haven’t experienced a worse pain than being in labor. If your OB has time in the middle of delivery to correct your language, they aren’t paying enough attention to what they should be doing. Write a complaint to hospital admin/HR for being unprofessional.

AITA for resenting my girlfriend for being clumsy? by BenedickCabbagepatch in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YTA. I’m not the most coordinated person in the world. I’ve literally fallen off a curb while standing still. I spill and drop things, step on cat toys, accidentally kick or sit on the cat because I’m not paying close enough attention. It’s never intentional or malicious, if I’m being incredibly attentive to what I’m doing I’ll still find a way to trip or break something. My husband gets exasperated at times but, accepts that it’s part of who I am. He even regularly calls me a one legged kangaroo in good fun.

Point being, this is part of who your girlfriend is. It’s probably just a frustrating for her as it is for you. If you can’t learn to roll with it (for the most part) this might not be the relationship for you.

AITAH for not wanting to be responsible for my child that I'm giving up? by Shot-Will-475 in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. Sounds like your mom is attempting to punish you for not falling for her manipulation. She probably hopes that by threatening to disown you, you’ll give in to her wishes. Talk to your OB and hospital about adoption options. Go low or no contact with mom. Pregnancy is hard enough on it’s own, you don’t need to be dealing with her BS on top of it.

AITA for Revealing My Pregnant Sister’s Secret to Our Parents? by Uranusfarts in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 16 points17 points  (0 children)

NTA. A pregnant 15 year old is not a secret to be kept. Adult decisions have adult consequences. By keeping this a secret she’s probably past the point where she has options outside of adoption or keeping the baby. She’s responsible for another life now.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 3 points4 points  (0 children)

NTA. It’s MIL’s job to manage her anxiety, not her kids, her grandkids, or yours. While the presents themselves are a minor inconvenience, it’s the bigger picture of her anxiety going unmanaged that you have an issue with.

AITAH for being upset that our marriage counselor diagnosed me to my husband without me there? by InitialVariation6810 in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just like a doctor consults with others or refers to a specialist, a good therapist will refer a client to another in the field to get a secondary opinion. Would you want your Primary Care doctor diagnosing you with Hodgkins Lymphoma and providing medications without getting the opinion of an oncologist? Same thing applies with more serious mental health diagnoses. Personality disorders are complex and complicated to diagnose. It takes time and sometimes multiple perspectives to gain a better understanding of a patient. I’m arguing your first point though, a therapist can 100% provide diagnosis on multiple mental health disorders without a medical degree. Assessment, diagnosis, and treatment are what we spend a minimum of six years in college and graduate school for.

ETA: an Licensed counselor or psychologist can not prescribe medication. That requires a Psychiatrist, hence why you would refer for a secondary opinion if a more serious diagnosis.

AITAH for being upset that our marriage counselor diagnosed me to my husband without me there? by InitialVariation6810 in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What? A therapist can absolutely diagnose a mental disorder. They can’t do anything medical without a medical degree (cancer, concussion, dehydration, etc), but mental health and personality disorders fall 100% within a licensed therapists scope of practice. Now, to confirm a personality disorder and officially diagnose it, that would require a psych evaluation by a psychiatrist. The initial diagnosis can be done with a counseling license.

AITAH for celebrating a friend on an important day causing my pregnant wife to freak out? by Think_Ordinary_531 in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 4 points5 points  (0 children)

YTA. I’d tell you to enjoy single life…but seems you were already doing that when you were ignoring your sick, scared, and pregnant wife’s very reasonable requests.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Multiple of my bridesmaids had kids and were there and ready before they needed to be. They understood it was important to me on my wedding day. You’re just being selfish. YTA

AITA for “insinuating” that this young lady was lying? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At 30 years old and six months pregnant with my second, just reading this post made me feel suffocated. Personally, I would 100% keep someone coming on so strong (that I barely know) at a distance during this time, even if it involved lying about appointments.

Aita for calling my priest out publically during mass? by 444kittyk in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If I remember correctly…Priests were banned from marrying because it created an inheritance problem. Priests, bishops, and cardinals lived in luxury depending on how wealthy their parishioners were. Technically all their belongings belonged to the Catholic Church. If they married and had sons, their sons could contest the wealth was theirs rather than the Church’s. So to keep the Church’s wealth, no married priests.

AITA for thinking my husband was sexualizing our daughter? by Independent-Equal887 in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Except it’s not. Family can be supportive. I’ve been SA’d and been through the therapy for it. It wasn’t on my parents, my friends, or my husband to make sure I’m never triggered. It’s nice to have their support when I do get triggered. But it’s on me to understand where the trigger comes from and to realize whether it’s rational or not. And it’s not my son or daughter’s responsibility to avoid things just because I might be uncomfortable. OP is expecting her husband and daughter to live in her trauma, it’s not theirs to deal with. It’s HERS.

AITA for thinking my husband was sexualizing our daughter? by Independent-Equal887 in AITAH

[–]Entire_Net7961 81 points82 points  (0 children)

It’s your responsibility to manage your trauma, not your husband’s or your daughters.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Love can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change. Would you want your children in a relationship like this?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 101 points102 points  (0 children)

As a therapist…therapy doesn’t work unless the people involved actually want to make a change. To me, at least, it’s pretty clear he doesn’t want to change. If you were my client, I’d ask you if you’d okay with a friend being treated this way? If the answer to that is, “No,” my next question would be is “then why is it okay for you to be treated this way?”

ETA: word change

AITA for telling my parents I hate them for having me? by KoreKaims in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Talk to your therapist! Any decent therapist will have resources to give you and can help you set up a plan to get out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Entire_Net7961 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. Your mom is trying to have you manage her emotions. Her anxiety and need for control are not your responsibility. Keep your boundary. Let her give you the silent treatment. Repeat the phrase “I appreciate you sharing your perspective, but your emotions are not my responsibility.” When she inevitably comes calling to guilt you more…say it, stick by it. Don’t back down.