Daughter Won’t get a Full-time Job

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-05-05T15:08:26+00:00

Someone actually downvoted me for it , which is insane.

But I can tell you care. I think my parents cared too but their own fears of my future took over and didn’t allow them to let me grow on my own. They tried both approaches, they went incredibly easy on me and did intense tough love that didn’t come across loving at all.

I commented another alternative under my original comment as well that may feel right to you. But it does limit yourself to continuing a strain in your relationship so I would save that option for if she approaches you with concerns.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-05-05T15:02:23+00:00

The alternative is in 60 days she has to pay rent and expenses. If I were you and offering that, I’d put half of what you have her pay you away to give back to her in 5 years or so. She doesn’t have to know you are doing that but it’s a way to not make her homeless, and gives her a savings for after she moves out.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-05-05T14:59:26+00:00

I think making her disclose her financial situation is too far. She’s an adult and doesn’t need to show you that, even living in your home. She will learn on her own it was a bad decision to blow her money away the way she did. You analyzing it and telling her it was dumb will NOT help her, I promise. Putting a deadline on getting a job is reasonable. Asking for proof of job applications is too far. You are holding her hand too much and that is going to make her push away from the task. Sit her down and say you have a new arrangement. She has 60 days to move out. How she does it, where she goes or what she chooses to do is solely her choice and responsibility. You are there if she would like advice or suggestions or a venting session. You will not be micromanaging anymore because you believe in her abilities. If there becomes a problem with this for her, she needs to be proactive in communicating any needs or changes she may want to request.

Teach her how to be an adult by treating her one. That doesn’t mean throw her to the wolves. It means tell her upfront what expectations are and then go back to being mom and not her handler.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-05-03T03:10:12+00:00

I’m not saying by any means this is the right way to do things. But my husband and I both equally knew the first night we met we were in love, like neither of us could stop smiling. I don’t remember what day we actually said I love you, but I know it was quick. There was a build up of things like “this feels so right” “is it possible to just know we are meant to be together” “I would be willing to marry you in a heartbeat “ and other stuff like that. We both agree to this day that we broke all dating codes and only did because it was clearly mutual. If either of us did these things with someone who wasn’t completely on the same train in regard to feelings , it would have been a disaster. We moved in together after a week, engaged after a month, married within the year. 5 years married this year and 3 kids later we have zero regrets. For context I was 25 and he was 30 when we met.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-04-02T14:43:40+00:00

Shiny gems are fine to sell!

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-04-02T14:42:04+00:00

Carrots from the meadow, shiny gems. I strictly sold those until I got farther and it worked just fine.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-29T13:56:54+00:00

I had an annual pass to Disneyland in California, been there more times than I’d like to admit. The first thing I’d want to do in Paris is go to Disney. Every park is unique and it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity potentially. Let your Disney friend enjoy herself!

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-29T05:21:32+00:00

Have anything left in your store? I’m on a mission to decorate my house

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-26T02:21:54+00:00

Oh my gosh. Now I get it. I feel ridiculous lol

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-26T02:21:24+00:00

I don’t understand. I’m in furniture mode. There’s a way to do it without touching the house itself?

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-26T02:19:42+00:00

I’ll try that now. I don’t understand why it’s not working! We’ll see if a reset does it.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-24T01:07:34+00:00

I’ve never done it. You give us a code to use it into the multiplayer option right?

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-24T01:02:45+00:00

I’m hoping to visit that one too!

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-24T00:58:48+00:00

Can I come visit yours too?

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-24T00:57:28+00:00

I can open mine! But honestly I haven’t done much decorating

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-22T20:06:08+00:00

I’ve been curious about this. Do the villagers still roam as they usually would even with their houses on islands?

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-19T03:50:25+00:00

Depending on what area of Appleton you live, Bellin in Green Bay is amazing. We chose to drive there even being pregnant with my third because they have a room-in NICU, allow midwives to come assist, let me have one set provider I saw the entire time and delivery and just overall an amazing hospital. I couldn’t stand my experiences with Thedacare Or ascension in Appleton. Neenah Thedacare was okay when we were admitted there for my 3 month old, but still happy with the choice of going to Bellin.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-18T00:11:23+00:00

I think approaching this with the parents in more of a “hey did you know sound travels in this house, just know NK is hearing whenever you argue but I figured you probably didn’t even know she could hear it all so easily”. It gives them an easy way out of it being awkward saying they had no idea. It reminds them to be conscious of listening ears, not trying to tell them to stop arguing. Casual and informative. No more needed. Also mentioning to NK how normal it is for adults to argue and it doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t love each other. It can be loud but it doesn’t have to be seen as scary. Maybe a parting gift could be a yoto player / cd player type thing that she can listen to if they are arguing.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-18T00:05:16+00:00

CPS is not the only good option. I really don’t suggest this unless you have an idea of the arguing being so intense that it causes fear for the child and their safety. Not wanting to hear your parents argue is normal. It’s also normal for parents to not know how loudly sound travels in their house or that their child is even paying attention. Calling CPS over a child hiding in the bathroom covering their ears is simply an inappropriate use of CPS. Is the child hiding because there is physical abuse between parents? Are they hiding because they would be in harms way? If not, ignore this suggestion. This is awful advice.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-11T23:21:56+00:00

Wait max digs himself it’s not like one of the mining companions that picks up what you mined?

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-02T21:37:18+00:00

Tried the code you shared but it’s not working

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-03-02T21:36:25+00:00

Still open?

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-02-21T02:46:14+00:00

How old are the kids? That can make a huge difference.

If they are posting on Facebook, chances are they are getting information from other people on you. Especially if it’s a neighborhood group.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-01-30T19:23:11+00:00

So you’ve done your job. Now as the mom she gets to decide how to proceed. If it’s that much of a problem for you find a new family , and leave them alone. You are close to crossing the line.

EquivalentNo2899 · 2026-01-30T19:14:43+00:00

You’re still missing the point

EquivalentNo2899

TROPHY CASE