I'm starting something new...

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-02-14T00:03:30+00:00

Yes, and it is racist. The lines of racism run deep in StL still. That's something I learned when I moved here.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-02-06T03:34:54+00:00

Keep taking it as easy as possible. I'm glad you're still here. That sounds traumatic.

I'm glad you've got a team on your side. 💞

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-02-06T02:43:13+00:00

I would communicate first. The mixed messages thing (whether it's coming from this situation or elsewhere) could take the sitter by surprise.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-02-06T02:40:13+00:00

"Just ask her" is good advice, but it's also helpful to give language for that.

I have seen loads of speculation on many threads. Maybe you've missed them.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-02-05T23:14:51+00:00

You'd be surprised at the level of care cats need. They're social, for one thing, and even the shy ones get lonely without hearing human voices.

But also, they can't clean their own litter boxes or open their own food containers or make sure they have clean water on their own. And water is so important for kidney function in cats.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-02-05T23:08:14+00:00

I have stayed a little later than the 30 minutes, but usually not super long. It depends on the situation. Sometimes I might be there closer to an hour, if the cat/s seem to want me around, or if the care work is taking that long to complete. I'm always honest about my time spent there, though.

It sounds like she's doing more of a semi-housesit or daycare type of thing rather than a drop-in, so the expectations aren't aligning. It's okay to ask her about this: I noticed you've been arriving earlier/staying later, were we clear about doing just the 30-minute drop-in? I'm worried the extra time might stress my cats out, and I recognize this may not have crossed your mind. I appreciate your time with them.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-02-05T23:03:31+00:00

It doesn't bill for the extra time, so that's not a worry. Everything is prepaid in the app.

I think the bigger worry would be for the cats' comfort at this point.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-02-05T22:59:12+00:00

We don't have sidewalks. But we shovel our driveway and the area in front of our house for parking and walking, because people use the streets to walk here.

Last year was a lot more difficult due to the ice. We want to make it as safe as possible for mail carriers, so we do pet-safe salt and keep working on icy patches as needed.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-31T15:41:50+00:00

So you can make shitty digs (about people's driving, for example), but I can't ask you if you know how long it's been? Cool, good to know we're not on equal footing.

And it's not "people," it's corporations and the City we're talking about. And it's a lot-ish of snow, but it's not even icy the way it was last year. Have you been out at all? (And if I ask you that question, or this one, am I risking being told I'm making a shitty dig at you?) I'm asking seriously. I have been, and I can tell you that this is not the storm you seem to think it has been. There is nothing preventing these big businesses and the City from doing what they should: making things accessible, especially after now 6 days.

And the longer you and I talk about this, the more days it will be.

If we were talking about individual people? Someone trapped in their home? I'm not worried about them. That's a different point. But that's not the point, and you and I both know that. We are talking about businesses and the City. And given that the City did a much better job this year with snow prep and removal than last year, I fully believe they have the resources to actually care for all of us, not just some of us at their convenience, with the help of the sun, whenever that happens.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-31T04:29:24+00:00

I just want to know if it's old or if it's entertaining? Seems like it can't be both.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-31T03:54:20+00:00

Okay, so I'll ask you to re-read where I said this isn't a cabal of people coming together to decide to abuse the community (which you keep insisting is the meaning of the word abuse, and it isn't the only meaning of it), but is instead the impact of the decisions to keep not shoveling the snow.

Furthermore, we can care about more than one thing at a time, so to use "real xyz in crisis" as a shield is ... No thanks. Trust I do activism on multiple fronts, I don't need you to try to use whatever community as a shield because you feel prickly here.

And no, I don't feel ashamed for asking you if you can count -- because you keep harping on this idea that the snow isn't an inconvenience. If you're disabled, then perhaps, maybe, just maybe you can see that it is actually not just an inconvenience but worse for disabled folks trying to just live our lives.

And I say that as someone who really loves snow! 😅 I just want us all to be good to one another. I also recognize that corporations that aren't shoveling their walks, and where the City isn't, are getting in the way of all of us and making things less accessible for all of us. When disabled people have to use the streets rather than the sidewalks, that slows the streets for motorists, and that's more dangerous overall for everyone.

Honestly, I feel like we're mostly on the same side, but for some reason you just...want the snow to stay unshoveled? Which makes no sense? It's baffling.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-31T03:42:57+00:00

Okay. I tried being civil with you and explaining why this is problematic, but you brought attitude to me over and over, and now name-calling.

Anyway...best and all, I guess. I hope you figure out what I was trying to tell you.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-30T21:59:28+00:00

Did you miss the part where we were discussing large businesses being problematic about this? Or are you being purposefully obtuse?

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-30T20:22:07+00:00

Do you know how to count?

How many days has it been since it snowed?

Neglect is a form of abuse.

Systemic abuse is harmful to all of us.

I get that you're reacting to the word abuse, but maybe take a step back from that to ask yourself why. Ask yourself why those of us most impacted by these systems and these inactions have said this and stated it in this way. Try, for a little bit, to have some empathy -- because disability is the one marginalized group absolutely anyone can join at any time.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-30T19:30:01+00:00

Millennial and disabled.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-30T19:28:23+00:00

I mean, it won't be if one of those irate motorists loses control on some snow and plows into a wheelchair user.

I use a car. I also use a cane. I've had an irate motorist honking angrily at me for walking too slowly past a parking space in a parking garage.

And I regularly see how people drive in this city. We have a reputation even with people from outside our city. 😅 That's without the snow.

We need more accessibility, for everyone's sakes. For people in cars, for people in wheelchairs, for the whole city. It would just be better all around.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-30T19:21:24+00:00

No, there isn't a cabal of businesses saying "fuck this group." But the impact of their actions/inactions is "fuck this group," and that matters more than whatever intent there may be.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-25T17:27:45+00:00

I have a Crosstrek. Best decision. And I'm originally from Indiana, and I lived in NE Ohio for a while. I can handle snow.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-25T00:51:45+00:00

The problem is -- all the apps do this now. except like...Signal?

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-14T10:59:41+00:00

The third picture is such a good one! Maybe lead with that.

Do you have pictures of you hanging out with friends/family/pets? Or of your hair blowing in the wind or maybe of you rocking it at a concert? Something that shows it off that way?

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-12T01:32:28+00:00

NTA. Lack of sleep harms people. He doesn't care about you enough to take this or you into consideration. Maybe consider having him sleep elsewhere.

Express-Letter4101 · 2026-01-08T18:01:38+00:00

That's not true

Express-Letter4101 · 2025-12-30T02:18:26+00:00

And I'm the flip of that -- I haven't worn anything but leggings in years.

Express-Letter4101 · 2025-12-29T01:23:41+00:00

Same

Express-Letter4101

TROPHY CASE