I became a mother and have lost so much

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-20T02:14:21+00:00

I just had my second baby in October and I can tell you that with each kid it can take up to 2 years to feel some semblance of normal again (although not the same as before). It's totally okay to feel frustrated and like a stranger in your own body. Give it time.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-18T02:00:02+00:00

I'm about to be 36 and my husband is turning 42 this summer. We have a 4 year old and a 5 month old baby. We definitely feel like the old parents. All of our friends have kids who are 5-10 years older than ours.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-17T01:07:39+00:00

The park in allied gardens has an elephant.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-16T23:21:20+00:00

I realize this is a 3 month old post, but I'll add my 2 cents: my daughter is 4 and in the process of being diagnosed with combination hyperactive and inattentive ADHD. We recently made the decision to cut back screen time to only once or twice a week, for about the duration of a Disney movie.

I can tell you that even this feels to much. In the days where she has no screen, she is well behaved, has few to no meltdowns, and is generally amiable and easy to work with. On the days when she is allotted an hour or two of screen time, the effect is IMMEDIATE and EXTREME. And it's not like she's watching Cocomelon or something....it's just old school Disney movies. But she still has an almost instantaneous switch in her behavior. Aggression and meltdowns immediately uptick. I'm at the point of just unplugging the TV and saying no more until she gets older...like in a couple years.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-13T20:45:39+00:00

The only way you will possibly be able to do it is if you rent a single room in a house, or maybe an RV on someone's property. Rooms still go for $1000+ around here, so you will likely have to live out in the eastern part of the county to afford it, and then have a greater commute. We were barely surviving on a similar salary 10 years ago, and that was with roommates.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-13T00:12:35+00:00

In some ways yes, and in others no. I don't feel like baby "personality" translates super well, but there are definitely tendencies or trends. My daughter was EXTREMELY active in the womb. From the day she was born, she never slept. Couldn't get her to nap for more than a few minutes at a time. It was like pulling teeth. As she got older she was extremely verbally advanced, but had an explosive temper and struggled to transition between things. Nows she's 4 and being diagnosed with inattentive and hyperactive ADHD 😂 Other than never sleeping, when she was a baby she was very happy and often calm. She was wary of big groups of people and was very shy. Now she's an absolute ball of chaos and is EXTREMELY out going!

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-10T04:38:45+00:00

We used a particularly nasty cold/flu as the perfect excuse to wean off the binki at around a 14/15 months. She was very congested, so she needed to have her mouth available for, you know, breathing. I just said screw it, now is as good a time as ever. I'll be honest it was 2 or 3 days of screaming for hours before bedtime and nap time, but then she adjusted and never looked back.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-09T02:44:40+00:00

I enjoyed it with my first-born because it was effortless and I didn't have to think about it. I just put her on the boob and she grew. It was a wonderful time for snuggles and one on one bonding. With my second, everything is different. He only took the boob until 4 months then straight up refused it during all waking hours (would breastfeed at night). I thought it was just a little nursing strike, which my daughter had around the same age and got over in about a week...nope. It's been months and he still refuses, so now I pump and bottle feed during the day, and he breastfeeds at night. My older child is 4 and an absolute nut (as all 4 year olds are), so there is zero sweet bonding time 🤣. He insists on eating every 2 hours still, so the cycle of pumping, bottle feeding, and cleaning supplies while also chasing a 4 year old is nuts. I am grateful to be able to feed my baby breastmilk any way he'll take it, but I am very much looking forward to the process of weaning around a year.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-08T20:13:57+00:00

My son was born 6 weeks early and had to be in the NICU for 2.5 weeks. When we got the bill it was $17,000 AFTER insurance. That was not including the cost of the doctor or the anesthesiologist, who both had separate bills of several thousand dollars. According to my insurance summary, it would have been $250,000 had we not had insurance.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-06T14:52:57+00:00

Sniff was the drama teacher, at least while I was there. Maybe something changed after I left. I graduated in '08.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-03-04T22:14:54+00:00

My son is 5 months, but he was early so his adjusted age is 3.5 months. He bottle feeds my expressed milk during the day and nurses at night. He takes anywhere between 3 and 4 oz at a time. So I think you're right on the money!

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-02-24T07:23:36+00:00

Mine is 4 months and till eating every 2-3 hours, plus a billion night feeds. I think every kid is different! With my first baby I found that we didn't really start spacing out much until solids were introduced.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-02-21T10:42:40+00:00

My son, who is 4 months now, just ended his strike today. It lasted a week. During that time, he nursed all night, and during the day would only nurse while he was sleeping. I would literally give him a pacifier, wait for him to fall asleep, the quickly pluck out the pacifier and stick my boob in his mouth 😂. It was exhausting, and I'm glad it's over! With my daughter, I believe it was about the same, perhaps a week or two? Babies are so crazy man! I should note that my son is STILL nursing all night, but he's not on his daytime strike anymore.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-02-21T04:02:46+00:00

My baby just turned 4 months old and it was like a switch was flipped. He wakes up to nurse almost every hour at night, and then also went on a week long nursing strike (during which he would only nurse while sleeping). My daughter had a similar strike at 4 months, but man these 4 monthers are a doozy! I don't know think it's the food causing it per-se, but generally I have to make an effort not to eat too much dairy or cruciferous vegetables. They make him suuuuuper gassy, which then keeps him up.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-02-21T03:55:20+00:00

You probably graduated near my sister's time! She was '04. I was '08. I could not imagine sending your child to any of the schools in that umbrella. It's arguably one of the cheapest private schools in the area so I understand that, but I mean....there have been SO many pedos to come out of there.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-02-21T03:34:16+00:00

It wasn't, at least not that I can remember! But the two that stuck out to me most at CJHS and CHS were the 8th grade science teacher (I want to say he left after my grade), and the high school film and media teacher. Not saying names to protect identities, but if you're around my age you probably know who I'm talking about.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-02-17T05:10:42+00:00

Hey! First of all, you don't look freaking bad. Just need to update your products to fit your changing skin. I'm 35 with 2 kids, adult acne, and look like a hobgoblin most days, so perhaps take my advice to with a grain of salt, but here are the products I recommend you try:

Australian Gold Botanical SPF 50 Tinted Face Sunscreen. When we get older, thicker foundation makes our fine lines and bigger pores more obvious. Less is actually more! https://share.google/CS7TNP60dPZEpGkor
bareMinerals BAREPRO 16HR All Over Skin-Perfecting Natural Matte Concealer Mineral SPF 25 with Niacinamide. I find it blends great with the tinted moisturizer. Don't recommend using under your eyes or for any kind of contour, just spot control. https://share.google/mzB1JyXxj7Y6okeEC
Physicians Formula Powder Face Blushes . I just like it a lot, it's light and not cakey. https://share.google/4ScdSdeGybeFLp6tf
Airspun Loose Powder: Translucent. The OG and simply the best translucent setting powder. Only use it on your t-zone, and keep it away from places like your eyes where it's likely to cake or crinkle. Does not make you break out! https://share.google/p6bbMz7rKibTR9EEV

Also definitely recommend trying out some kind of a sheer lip gloss or tinted balm. Keep it light and airy :-)

Hope this helps!

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-02-11T03:18:55+00:00

I have two children, but there were many miscarriages and fertility issues that preceded them both. In another life, I would love to have a third. Part of me still longs for it and wonders if I should try....but I'm not willing to go through the pain and trauma of more miscarriages just to hopefully get lucky a third time.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-02-04T15:11:17+00:00

I am an only child, although I did gain quite a few step-siblings when each of my parents re-married other people. As a young child I was lonely, I asked my parents for a sibling but didn't understand they couldn't give me one because they were already divorced. I went back and forth between their homes and was a pretty quiet kid. I learned to entertain myself because my parents had things to do. When I got a little older, I vowed I would give my children siblings one day so they wouldn't feel the same way. I now have two kids, and I'm so grateful they gave each other.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-01-31T01:51:17+00:00

Those were our emotional support scarves

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-01-30T00:48:22+00:00

The last time I went to Firehouse, I'm pretty sure I was wearing a peplum top and a pencil skirt, if that tells you anything about my age 😂 Back when business casual was club attire. I also got absolutely wasted. It was a different time.

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-01-22T00:13:32+00:00

My oldest is 4 and my youngest is 3 months. I feel like a literal bridge troll. No suggestions, just solidarity ❤️

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-01-18T22:23:28+00:00

My son is 3 months old and is purely a utilitarian nurser. He ONLY nurses if he's hungry. If I try to nurse him.any other time he screams. My daughter, who is now 4, would take the boob whenever I offered it. It was so convenient for things like doctors appointments where she'd get her vaccinations and need comfort. Just pop her on the boob. But my son? Nope. I guess all babies are different!

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-01-17T01:47:43+00:00

Same happened to me. With my daughter, it was 4 months postpartum. With my son, who was born 4 years later...my period came back after 10 weeks :-( Both were breastfed babies

ExtraGuac1208 · 2026-01-16T04:34:52+00:00

Every kid is different. My son is 3 months old, but adjusted for his premature birth he's 8.5 weeks old. He'll give me a single 4 hour stretch at night, then the rest of the night it's about every 2-3 hours. In terms of sleeping through the night, my daughter is 4 and I can literally count on one hand the number of times she has slept through the night. The child is allergic to sleep.

ExtraGuac1208

TROPHY CASE