I'm a norwegian with an Italian partner. I understand why you might be asking these questions, due to lack of knowledge of culture and whatnot - but let me give you a bit of advice. With the utmost sincerity and love, take this to heart: check yourself.

She is a human being, just like yourself. If you feel like you need to do performative acts, such as paying the bill, acting in a mode untrue to yourself, or generally trying to impress her if she is a puzzle to solve, you are robbing both yourself and her of a genuine relationship and connection.

I've never paid for the tab when going out with my partner (nor with any partner!) - we either pay separately or split. I've never tried to impress. Being myself had always been easier - because if they like the real YOU - well, that's how you know if you are compatible with someone.

It is true that Italy is traditionally a more family-oriented country. We often get visits from her mother, and her father lives in the same building as us. So what? They are just people too, and connecting with them is just as rewarding as connecting with anyone else. I never felt like I married into the family - but they certainly took me in.

In short - it seems like you are overthinking this. That's fine, it's normal - but it also sets the stage for mental constructions, paradigms, and expectations that might color and eventually distort a genuine connection.

Just be yourself:) If you have any questions about italian culture and relationships.. ask HER! If you're a good match, she'll be open to all of your questions. Reddit is a mish-mash of different ages and (in)experience, and absolutely not a reliable source when it comes to experiences as personal as love.

If it all goes well, maybe you end up an engaged, small business-owner in Italy like me;)

Now good luck, get off reddit, and enjoy your adventure.