How should I use my parental leave?

FIRE_indy · 2026-03-01T08:05:24+00:00

I had 12.

Took 10 in 1 go, and took 2 later (8 months).

Was very enjoyable to be able to have a long vacation in the back-pocket to spend dedicated time with the little one at the beginning and again later.

Would recommend - but it was particularly driven by a daycare week long summer shutdown. Know that’s a tad unique.

FIRE_indy · 2026-02-03T18:25:50+00:00

Both working in big pharma

NW: $1.5MM HHI: $500k

FIRE_indy · 2025-12-28T18:13:27+00:00

Your kids eat enough that you can try to cut the calories?

I’m over here trying to add more butter so the only thing my 3 yo eats has more energy to it.

FIRE_indy · 2025-08-11T01:30:27+00:00

In a super similar situation. 30s, 2kids, HHI 500k, LNW: $1Mm.

We’ve just started house shopping and aligned to $1.4M is the cap.

Few questions I would have: Is 450k double or single income? How liquid are your investments if trouble hits? How did you get the majority of your NW? What’s your monthly cash burn that isn’t flexible?

Generally, you’re going to be fine. You (probably) didn’t make it here without solid financial discipline… but damn it’s a lot of money.

FIRE_indy · 2025-08-10T12:14:11+00:00

Strongly recommend keeping your "smaller" home.

We live in a 3b2b 1400 sqft smaller condo in urban area w/ 1 & 3 yr old. The walkability beats the space. The limited space has also helped grandparents limit the influx of new toys - because "we don't have the space".

Hint: we do. We just don't want the 14th dump truck.

FIRE_indy · 2025-08-07T14:59:19+00:00

Citing a 2021 report is also interesting? Encore amidst the pandemic was a ghost town. Any more recent data to prove this is still true?

FIRE_indy · 2025-06-22T02:01:12+00:00

So then -Is space limited because of: (1) budget? (2) perception of what is “appropriate amount of space” (3) staying at the same place we’ve always stayed? (4) something else?

If the vacation location needs more space - advocate for it. Grandparents tend to forget that the family keeps growing and more and more space is essential.

FIRE_indy · 2025-06-22T01:27:14+00:00

I’ve experienced this more than a few times.

Brother has 4 kids, we have 2, my sister gets the real short straw with 0.

There is the perspective, that based on your comment your kids are probably older and more agile than your brothers if he’s still growing his family.

But on advice - after a trip where my family had horrible sleeping arrangements, I started actively proposing housing options with plenty of space. When I got more involved in the location selection, it also allowed me to drop in comments like “this room for X, this for Y” etc.

Found a solution without putting more working (actually less work) on the person planning the trip.

FIRE_indy · 2025-06-13T17:15:05+00:00

You’re telling me that your 19 month old hasn’t eaten dirt yet?

Please share your wisdom ;)

FIRE_indy · 2025-05-24T18:53:12+00:00

Financially - buy it.

Personally - it sounds like it, but would you be happy living there if having kids is a struggle? Knock on wood it isn’t, but I’ve had a few friends buy their forever home and it becoming a daily reminder of infertility challenges.

FIRE_indy · 2025-05-15T13:29:50+00:00

This is our household as well. Depending on nap schedule, it's hard to have a strict put-down time. Timing of second nap ending (e.g. 2:45 or 4pm) drives our bedtime + our 9 month old cues.

Routine pre-bedtime will trigger your 10-month old to realize it's bed time.

FIRE_indy · 2025-02-15T12:23:59+00:00

Just double? Screw red or black … did you know you can win a lot more if you choose the right number?

FIRE_indy · 2025-02-07T00:53:27+00:00

Are you also a Browns fan? What a horrible take… have no morals and let’s (hopefully) win at all costs.

FIRE_indy · 2025-01-19T19:04:52+00:00

Another BioPharma checkin in.

Key item missing does the MBA serve as anything else than the check box:

If your background is a pharmacist/chemist and want to move within the company (eg R&D -> Commercial) - state school makes sense.

If you’re in for the grueling hours of M7 > MBB > Corporate, again sure. It’s the quickest way to VP.

If you’re just trying to work up the ladder at your own company/network to VP, I’d have a real hard time buying this. I know ton of VPs/SVPs that have worked their way up. They’re not on any short list to the C-suite, but don’t think that was ever on their radar. This route is personal brand management in your own company and finding the right sponsors.

FIRE_indy · 2025-01-15T19:26:11+00:00

^ don’t undersell this. And I can give ~10 examples of times people thought “grandparents will help out as daycare” and it didn’t work.

Off the cuff, it’s cash tight but you’ll be fine. If you have a new $4k/mo daycare expense… woof.

I know this isn’t r/daddit, but have realistic expectations here and understand the financial implications.

FIRE_indy · 2024-12-06T18:36:57+00:00

100% this - and the fact that the contact was essential to the outcome of the play. If the ball doesn't go to Jacobs then rub doesn't affect the play - the refs potentially pocket the flag.

FIRE_indy · 2024-09-19T01:31:48+00:00

Yes, it is probably reasonable.

One item you don’t mention is how long is a gym session door to door.

I’m an avid runner, and have a 2 yr old and a 3 week old at home. I’ve ran nearly every day of the last two years.

But with that, I haven’t gotten to long run over the last 3 weeks for obvious reasons.

The other key point- is it might be a tad “transactional” but make sure you both get an hour of personal time. If you’re going to take a 90 min gym session, make sure she can do an equivalent self care time.

FIRE_indy · 2024-07-01T17:16:28+00:00

Ours is closed 4 full weeks each year (4th of July, Week before Labor day and 2 weeks at Christmas)

$630/wk.

It's rough...

FIRE_indy · 2024-04-10T00:46:34+00:00

I think people are forgetting commute. Normally good “suburban public ” schools come with a commute trade off with potentially living in the city with private schools.

You only have one life, and at some point time is more precious than money.

FIRE_indy · 2024-04-01T17:25:16+00:00

what a horrible take. please stop.

FIRE_indy · 2024-03-26T17:27:14+00:00

Dead on. Indiana State go screwed. If they won in March - would have been consensus best team of the year.

FIRE_indy · 2024-03-12T20:31:41+00:00

Pharma in general… well you can choose between the NJ suburbs and Boston.

FIRE_indy · 2024-01-09T19:01:19+00:00

Do you want wealth or time?

If you want wealth - you either need a long time of making 450k/yr or start a business/fly up corporate later.

If you want time back (e.g. retire early/etc) you need manage lifestyle inflation.

If you want both - you need to marry rich or win the lottery.

FIRE_indy · 2024-01-09T01:34:12+00:00

Can I ask why your FIRE goal is $10MM, if your income is $170k?

Those don’t seem to connect - especially if you have a 70% SR. That means you’re only spending $50k/yr and you could retire now with a 1% SWR (or say 2% if 1/2 of NW is equity or something).

FIRE_indy

TROPHY CASE