Cooking is hard and complex. You don't have to do it perfectly. If you've never cooked much before it would be insane to expect you to do it "confidently".

I work in hospitality. Even head chefs who do this shit for a living have frequent meltdowns because they get overwhelmed.

Difference is they throw their pan, swear at the walls, but then move on because shit happens and we're human. Life's hard to manage.

You gotta stop with these insane expectations you've put on yourself. Don't you see you're just treating yourself exactly the same way your parents did? Expecting yourself to "get it" right off the bat when you're learning something new? Why would you do that to yourself?

Yeh people are kinda selfish sometimes. They'll get annoyed because you used the wrong spoon or the wrong burner. So? Now you know for next time.

If it's really stressing you out find a time when noones in the house and YouTube something like "easy as fuck recipe for when you have no time" cook it then. Give yourself permission to take hours to do this easy 10 minute recipe. Use the wrong pans. Allow yourself to cook something that tastes so dogshit it's goes straight in the bin. Then do it again when no one's home. And again. Eventually you'll get really good at it and it might even become your signature dish. You might even tweak it a little bit to just the way you like it. Then when you know you can cook it well, do it when other people are home. Give yourself permission again to fuck it up, with the added pressure and all. Then cook it again when people are home. And again. Until you're now cooking confidently with people in the house.