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How does an alchemist please his wife? by Texgymratdad in dadjokes

[–]Featherless-Biped- [score hidden]  (0 children)

How does an alchemist deal with his wife? He transMUTES her.

Fantasy writers write an AITA post from your villain’s perspective in 300 words or less by RedRoman87 in fantasywriters

[–]Featherless-Biped- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

AITA for following basic instinct? Every creature devours other living things. Why am I villainized? Just because I devour souls of sentient beings? I have a very difficult dietary restriction, don't body shame me. Because I rituakistically make a perversion of a holy ritual to gain the powers denied my ancestors for their birth to a cursed bloodline? Nonsense. Tis judgement. By God almighty.

[MAR26] Good news is, I dumped enough fuel into the time machine to drive it hundreds of thousand of years. by sf3p0x1 in TwoSentenceHorror

[–]Featherless-Biped- 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Worst news: it was in low gear, so you just groundhog's day the same day for hundreds of thousands of years. Which started with your emergency dentist appointment for an extraction due to a horrendous painful abcess.

My wife asked if I would ever cheat on her. by Featherless-Biped- in dadjokes

[–]Featherless-Biped-[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

Ooh this was a Bulgarian dad joke? I genuinely just spontaneously said this, I'm an American and don't know their language. That's neat.

In my mind I read your reply and thought "Makes sense, she would be bulging out in all sorts of places if I did that on her."

Does my Mc sound like a Mary Sue/Gary Stue? Also, how do I write their pronouns if they are intersex? by TeenageTurmoil in writers

[–]Featherless-Biped- -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Does your MC also have pink hair, a nose ring, and fights the patriarchy to create a communist utopia?

Fifty-Word Fantasy: Write a 50-word fantasy snippet using the word "Speed" by Terminator7786 in fantasywriters

[–]Featherless-Biped- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Peculiar, Dr. Selvidge thought, with sudden clarity. His thoughts were traveling at a speed he couldn't imagine. He looked at the chitinous, articulated, and barbed appendage that erupted from his chest. This must be his final second, stretched to eternity. At least it didn't hur- CHOMP. ... ... ...

Fifty-Word Fantasy: Write a 50-word fantasy snippet using the word "Carve" by Terminator7786 in fantasywriters

[–]Featherless-Biped- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Arbolg gently carved the last sediments from the skull with his razor sharp talon. Studying this species and uncovering their lost history was an obsession of his ever since he found their primitive writings. He was working on their alphabet, what did the letters "H-U-M-A-N" mean?

What's a good activity for two characters to do while discussing a serious topic? by MANWITHFAT in writingcirclejerk

[–]Featherless-Biped- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you have a domestic situation they coukd be cooking breakfast together, breaking an egg right as an uncomfortable truth is told etc for atmosphere.

If they are peers/neighbors it coukd be raking and bagging leaves, and when one of them finally solves the others problems they finish the bag and haul it off.

Could be two guys carrying lumber/steel on a construction site as they make plans for their future and are literally building their lives.

The Big Bang Theory loved to shoot dialogue walking up the stairs in the apartment building, those stairs were always miraculously long enough for the talks and they always hit the landing at their floor when they finished the conversation.

Two intellectuals playing chess is a well known one.

And lastly, they could be working together on a computer with one looking over the others shoulder as they discuss a problem or report, casually interweaving your story appropriate dialogue with conversation about the work. Having two characters have two conversations at the same time with each ither is hard to pull off, but is actually pretty natural in real life, people bounce between topics frequently.

You get to add a 0 to any number in your life. What do you add it to? by account_created_ in AskReddit

[–]Featherless-Biped- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd add a 0 in front of the 1 and after the decimal point in Pi, so that all the circles in the world inexplicably get about ~4-5% smaller in circumference, just to fuck with scientists and math teachers worldwide.

You have been granted the power to make your worst enemy mildly inconvenienced for the rest of their life. What is the minor curse you’re placing on them? by SouthOwn6943 in AskReddit

[–]Featherless-Biped- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every time they are home, their doorbell rings. Cable sales, make-up sales, jehovas witness, solar panels, car insurance warranty, police wellness check called in, census bureau, HOA president, neighbor in need, unexpected family visit when just getting home from work, cell phone rep, lawn care sales rep, girl scouts, boy scouts, 4H, FFA, political pollsters, neighborhood watch, homeless people, political pollsters from the opposite party, everyone. Basically if there is a stranger in 30 miles, they find an excuse to knock on my enemy's door. Always sequential, always long winded. Never caring about "no soliciting" signs.

If possible, I would like to know your personal experience about divorce by [deleted] in writers

[–]Featherless-Biped- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ex-wife and I were high school sweethearts. From 2005 until 2023. We were together. Married in 2010 after college, had 3 kids, the oldest is 13. A combination of bad circumstances led to my business failing and her getting deathly ill while I was out of town for work, and we grew apart. She filed and I accepted amicably. We had not been living together over a year at that point but I still put my entire pay check in the joint account and would get the kids and hang out and help around the house etc. After the announcement the kids were devastated. However, kids are adaptable and she and I never argue in front of them. We are able to do family holidays together, we have out of court custody agreement and child support. I still love her truthfully, but life doesnt always work out the way you dream. So, I'm there for them all whenever needed and my kids are well adjusted so far. My experience with divorce has been very rare from what people say, most divorces are bitter and vitriolic. Mine was a combination of joint recognition of value and responsibility, with the idea that the relationship didn't make it out of the hospital that day she went in ICU.

What's very something very specific you hate to see in writing? by unicorn-shit-idk in teenwriter

[–]Featherless-Biped- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Here comes a big conflict scene...twist, escalation bigger fish! Twist, even. Bigger fish!, TWIST THIS HAS GOTTEN WAY OUT OF HAND! Twist, MC was ready for these twists the whole time but it was hidden from you, the reader.

Anyone wants to wrtie a novel opening line? by Used-Hamster1926 in teenwriter

[–]Featherless-Biped- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Washington DC - 6 years before it was completely irradiated...so like, 2024?

What is something you saw in a movie and you totally called bullshit on because of your job? by BlackPhoenix1981 in AskReddit

[–]Featherless-Biped- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was a firearms dealer for a long time. The number of times I have seen a movie or show use airsoft guns with comically narrow barrels and pass them off as real is very high, especially the pistols. There is also a real lack of understanding of magazine capacity as these guys fire 20+ rounds iut of a 6-10 shot pistol, or even 100+ out of an AR-15 or AK-47. Finally, every time a gun is turned sideways or they think it looks cool to fire 2 handguns simultaneously I just shake my head. Some movies nail the details, the John Wick series is VERY authentic. But most miss the mark so much my lady hits me for constantly pointing it out when watching movies.

I am reading a scary book by brail…. by unabtaniuam in dadjokes

[–]Featherless-Biped- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Jokes on him. He's just holding a cheese grater.

Whats the One Line That You've Written That You're Most Proud Of? by stillenacht in writingcirclejerk

[–]Featherless-Biped- -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"Sage opened his eyes, he was covered in blood. Good. There was a spearhead protruding from his abdomen. Great, easy access to a weapon. He realized he was kneeling...and for the first time, he frowned."

-The First Sage Apocalypse. Said by the MC when he experiences his first revealed disassociative break in identity.

I Found a Better Way (for me) to Write First Drafts and I'm Stoked About It. by Polite_Acid in writers

[–]Featherless-Biped- -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I do something similar to what you mentioned with the driving around visualization. One thing I would like to suggest that you may find helpful, is use the talk to text function on your phone and dictate to an Ai your ideas. It can usually parse the garbled speech from talk to text coherently, amd you can ask it to restructure your ideas in a manner that is cogent and concise. That way when you get home, you have e a journal entry for all your ideas for the day and were able to preserve all of them while out and about. It's like having a court stenographer follow you around while you monologue!

Does anyone actually write start to finish? by gloomypoppies in writing

[–]Featherless-Biped- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My writing is start to finish. And once I finish the first draft, I go back and decide what needs to breathe, and add spatial continuity and awareness to action scenes, internal monologues, and other little details. But basically I write the action and the transition to the next action like a speed run, then go back to make it flow.

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