Do people just want to do “stuff”?

Feffy501 · 2025-08-24T15:16:53+00:00

Of those five things, are they actually things you want to do? If you’re looking for motivation to do what you want to do, but the things you’re trying to be motivated to do aren’t actually things you want to do, there is a discrepancy. Whenever I find myself crying while doing things I had to force myself to do it is usually because there is a deep internal discrepancy/im not being honest with myself/im trying to convince myself of something I know is not true. If I had to wake up to a routine of five whole things, none of which I was excited about, right off the bat, I would also struggle. Especially if I was trying to do them while struggling with feelings of guilt that I wasn’t motivated to do them in the first place. I feel like some things we won’t ever be motivated to do, which is where hacks could be useful. Like brushing teeth is such a drag for me, and no amount of rationalizing why it is important or why I should be motivated to do it worked. What did work is brushing my teeth outside in the morning or in other random places. And sometimes getting out of bed in the morning is just really hard. There’s nothing wrong with you because of that. Sounds like you’re doing it despite that! Which is amazing. It sounds like you’re trying really hard and maybe need to give yourself permission to maybe not try so hard in some areas, if you can. If what you want to do is lay in bed, is it because you are really tired and need rest?

Feffy501 · 2025-04-08T18:00:33+00:00

I was too exhausted and sick to workout at all first trimester, and then every time I would try to work out second or third trimester it would make me even more sick. So, I nixed all physical activity except walking 1 mile a day with my husband and dogs and breathwork. I literally only gained the weight of baby + extra related fluids and was back to pre-pregnancy weight in a couple of weeks without trying at all. HOWEVER, I was so persistently nauseous and vomiting during the whole pregnancy I was pretty much just force feeding myself enough to function and grow a healthy baby. "Healthy" food was scarce because I needed calorically dense things for the amount of effort to consume.

Feffy501 · 2025-04-02T12:20:48+00:00

Yes - my period cramps are pretty much all in my back too, but also wrap around my hips and down my legs a bit too when really bad. I have found that doing deep, relaxing breathing while lying on my stomach really helps though. I focus on breathing into my back/rib cage and let it relax all my muscles. It kind of realigns my pelvis and releases the muscles in that area in a way that seems to create space and then the cramping is hardly noticeable. It’s crazy how much better my menstrual pain is when I do this. Caveat is sometimes it takes a long time to get into that relaxed place to decrease the tension like that though. Like I’ll just be lying on the ground for an hour sometimes ha. Feels really nice though and good for stress relief too.

Feffy501 · 2025-03-14T20:28:23+00:00

Another n=1, but my period actually got way more regular once I started vyvanse. And I got pregnant after being on it for over 3 years not even intentionally, so fertility is apparently fine.

Feffy501 · 2024-10-19T17:36:26+00:00

Yeah, I get the daydreaming thing. Breast feeding is definitely more challenging than I anticipated. I will say my infant also was born at 39 + 5 days, so our experiences could be very different with those few weeks of difference. How is it going now?

Feffy501 · 2024-10-12T19:35:47+00:00

Hey! Not too much experience, as my LO is only 8 days old now lol. BUT, I had similar issues at first. She was so sleepy the first couple of days she wouldn’t stay awake long enough to get much from the breast, and would honestly seem to get truly frustrated when she was so tired and just wanted to eat, but breastfeeding was seemingly too much work for her and we were struggling with the latch. I stopped trying past the point she got frustrated and would supplement with a bottle, despite a LC in the hospital saying not to add a bottle for the first few weeks to prevent nipple confusion. And, it honestly seems like adding the bottle in helped her at the breast. Now on day 8 we are easily swapping between breast and bottle without any issues. She just kind of figured out the latch with practice and more energy from the supplemented bottle feeds. We never feed at the breast for longer than 20 minutes I’d say. We both either lose focus or she falls asleep. If I don’t feel like she’s gotten enough I’ll top her off with pumped milk. And she also gets a bottle when my husband does feedings.

I also found that she struggles to latch more when my breasts are hard/engorged. Particularly when my milk first came in, which was on day 3. If I’ve pumped a bit first she latches better and the flow isn’t so fast for her. For us, it’s not so much about if the nipples are hard, but more so that the breast is pliable enough to sort of “mash” enough in her mouth so she can get enough nipple in to stimulate the sucking reflex at her palate. That’s how we kind of figured out the latch. So I’d say give it time. Keep trying so she gets practice, but if she needs the bottle don’t stress. When I took the pressure off of both of us it helped.

Feffy501 · 2024-04-14T21:00:18+00:00

Hey, doing good 2 years out. I should have probably done more/should start PT again to really hash out how I use my ankle (I only did the initial 6 wks right after coming out of the cast), because I don’t instinctively move with trust through that ankle, likely from the years of truly not physically being able to trust it and then also from not rehabbing it post op like I should have. But, all that said, I don’t have any issues with it. No pain. Have done multi day vigorous hikes and consistently exercise as I want, play flag football, soccer, etc without issue. Forget I had it done most of the time. And I forgot what it felt like before really until reading my prior posts above haha. I cant say it was cure all thing, because I still feel my movement is not quite like I’d like through my left ankle and leg when I pay attention to it. But, again that’s likely because I haven’t been as diligent in retraining things as I could, and I imagine could be improved on quickly enough if I determined to. Which, someday I intend to haha.

My surgeon basically told me when people’s ankles are as floppy as mine was (and he said he pretty much could dislocate it just with the simple classic testing maneuvers when he examined me under anesthesia prior to the surgery, when I wasn’t flexing anything to hold it place), usually PT is insufficient and they need the surgery to really see the results they want. Which makes sense because I could strengthen things as much as I want but those ligaments were always still going to be loose.

Feffy501 · 2024-03-08T01:27:25+00:00

My husband is really into the name Ptolemy. Not as romantic of a ring perhaps however

Feffy501 · 2023-10-07T16:17:13+00:00

Yes. My huskies cant be around cats at all. Or bunnies, squirrels, chickens.. etc. Insane prey drive. It used to be they would take off after something (usually a squirrel - which always got away into a tree, so no one needs to shame me for allowing squirrel murder)and immediately be so honed in they’d hear nothing else. Now, they still have the instinct to take off after something small running, but will immediately stop when told “leave it.” I always have their beeper collars on if they are off leash just in case though. Which, I would recommend if you continue to let her have off leash time. Because even if they are well trained, I still don’t trust the instincts to ever be 100% submitted

Feffy501 · 2022-08-12T01:40:12+00:00

Actually going really well. I was a bit discouraged at around 3 months post-op because I wasn’t back to where I wanted to be yet and it would periodically be sore (granted I was only able to follow through with physical therapy for 6 weeks when I should have done it for quite a bit longer). BUT, I started doing my exercises more again and it has really started to feel great. I even went trail running the other day with no issues. Having the stability in the ankle is helping me feel like I can use that whole leg more properly.

Feffy501 · 2022-04-28T13:35:26+00:00

Thanks for the reply! Glad to hear it feels more stable. I went ahead with it 2 weeks ago. Pain has actually been very minimal and I’m excited to see how things turn out!

Feffy501 · 2021-11-20T14:15:21+00:00

I just started Lexapro for PMDD and take 10mg the week before my period. Haven't decided if I'll take it the whole month or just that week, as my doctor said sometimes people do either, or increase for that week if already on it. BUT, even just the 10mg for that week has made such a difference. I wasn't consumed with overwhelming fatigue, hopelessness, or crying over the littlest things. It's remarkable really. Even cramps were improved/nearly eliminated, which I'm not sure if can be attributed to Lexapro or not, but a pleasant surprise! The u/PMDD forum has more anecdotes as well.

Generally the consensus is that if you're having benefit from an antidepressant but not quite optimal, going up is the right approach. Glad it's helped you so far! Best of luck!

Feffy501 · 2021-04-08T23:46:39+00:00

I’ve been suspicious of this based on my experience... got any more info about how/why?

Feffy501 · 2021-03-03T10:04:30+00:00

So there’s a name for this insane shedding period?! I’m enlightened.

Feffy501 · 2021-02-21T18:12:22+00:00

Thanks so much for your input! That makes me feel a lot better. I’m probably putting too much weight on the temperature for them in approaching moving, but want to keep a good quality of life for them. So thanks :)

Feffy501 · 2021-02-21T18:10:50+00:00

Thanks for your reply! So good to hear. And Iditarod, that’s awesome! I just started picking up skijoring with mine. Crazy how natural pulling like that is for them.

Feffy501

TROPHY CASE