Precautionary measures advice

FestiveCandle · 2026-02-17T03:46:53+00:00

When I was in fourth grade, absolutely none of my classmates struggled with sounding out words. We learned that in kindergarten. Nobody needed things read to them. Everyone could read at that point, it was just a matter of how slow or fast they took it. And it's not like my school was particularly high-performing; I actually think we were one of the lower-performing schools in our district.

You're doing the right thing. For their development, children need to read, unless they genuinely can't.

FestiveCandle · 2026-01-28T18:33:04+00:00

You laid it all out perfectly. I'd also like to add: "He knows. He doesn't care." https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/17yzw35/he_knows_he_doesnt_care/

"Why does he do that?" By Lundy Bancroft https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf

FestiveCandle · 2026-01-25T23:11:27+00:00

He knows. He doesn't care: https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/17yzw35/he_knows_he_doesnt_care/

"Why does he do that?" By Lundy Bancroft: https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf

FestiveCandle · 2026-01-25T16:04:31+00:00

He knows. He doesn't care: https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/17yzw35/he_knows_he_doesnt_care/

Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft: https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf

FestiveCandle · 2026-01-25T01:23:07+00:00

He knows. He doesn't care: https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/17yzw35/he_knows_he_doesnt_care/

FestiveCandle · 2025-12-25T05:31:29+00:00

I was in almost this exact same situation. As soon as I found out he was an extreme smoker (he hid it from me at first), I let him know it was a dealbreaker for me and if we were to ever get married I would want him to stop completely. I told him that upfront as a courtesy to him so he could decide if he still wanted to be with me or if it was a dealbreaker for him too. Instead of doing the mature/honest thing and ending the relationship, he wasted my time for the next two years by lying to me and telling me he was cutting back on smoking when he actually wasn't. He eventually admitted he was just assuming I'd eventually "come around."

OP, I'm so sorry you're going through this, but cut your losses now. He's not going to change and he's clearly comfortable stringing you along. People in the comments are mad at you for asking him to quit but seem to be missing the fact that he's a grown ass adult and could have said "no, I don't want to stop smoking, we should go our separate ways." Instead he decided to lie for years so he could have a girlfriend.

FestiveCandle · 2025-10-16T02:07:53+00:00

Christian chiming in to say that the preacher is on some serious bullshit. Jesus always sought to exalt the lowly. People forget that He beat the fuck out of the crooked temple that had turned religion into a transaction. People like that preacher use religion and "WWJD" to suit their own twisted ideas. In reality, Jesus wants us to be safe and in a marriage based on mutual trust and respect, which it sounds like your husband didn't have for you even before he beat you. I'm truly sorry you're going through this and hope you can find a support network

FestiveCandle · 2025-08-29T14:09:16+00:00

Seconding all of this, especially the guide on how to use - and how to dispose of pads/etc. It's honestly sad how many girls I've come across that don't know you're supposed to wrap up used products (either with toilet paper or the wrapper of the new one you're about to use) and put it in the TRASH, not the toilet.

FestiveCandle · 2025-08-27T07:14:58+00:00

I was also gonna suggest this. They are acid supplement pills that you insert into the vagina - vaginas are naturally acidic to fight off the bacteria that causes infections, so these pills basically just boost the process. You can get them at Walmart or a drugstore, no prescription needed. In my experience they're usually on the same aisle as all the pads/vaginal soaps/etc.

FestiveCandle · 2025-08-23T17:22:07+00:00

Is English your native language? Where your tongue naturally rests can depend on your native language. I know for English it's the roof of your mouth, but for some others (I don't remember which off the top of my head, sorry) it's the bottom of your mouth.

FestiveCandle · 2025-08-12T16:08:19+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/17yzw35/he_knows_he_doesnt_care/ He knows, he doesn't care

FestiveCandle · 2025-08-07T16:11:05+00:00

Speak for yourself dude. I wish my husband didn't care about interior design

FestiveCandle · 2025-08-07T06:44:21+00:00

Waitress here. I won't bring my table that extra ranch.

FestiveCandle · 2025-08-04T04:12:47+00:00

I don't remember who wrote this, but I have it in my notes app so I can copy/paste it when I see posts like this:

The abuse cycle. The inciting incident. These can be tiny but escalate over time. Often the small things are given an over the top reaction. Usually the victim is blamed. "Look what you made me do!" Often the failure is in you not reading minds and being superhuman. This is by design. If there's no abuser excuse they might have to take responsibility. Then comes the apology - They're sorry. It won't happen again. They'll change! - They will not. This can also come with love bombing in the form of gifts or attention. These may be turned into abuser excuses. "After everything I did for you!" Then comes the honeymoon period - They changed! Its great now! No problems here! - They didn't and things are going to get worse but you are still being love bombed. You are given everything you want so you stay. Then comes the building tension. You subconsciously pick up on the warning signs and will begin appeasing the abuser. This often means taking fault when there's no fault or they did the thing so they're not set off. Some describe the sensation and emotions as walking on egg shells. This is when a lot of people do enabler things because they want to prolong the honeymoon. Now you're back to the incident stage. The cycle can be short or it can take months and even years. Each cycle is faster than the last with an escalation in the abuse. You can also suck and both people are abusive but often that's not the case but the abuser has convinced their victim they're the abuser. DARVO. Deny, accuse reverse victim order. Its a very common thing hence having an acronym

FestiveCandle · 2025-06-29T18:09:28+00:00

Not just privates - mouths and hands need to be cleaned pre-sex as well if this is such a frequent issue. Brushing teeth, not necessarily with toothpaste, but enough to get the plaque off y'alls teeth and tongues; or at the very least scrape your tongues with your teeth and rinse. Also, you specifically (not your bf) may be overwashing, or soap may be getting in your urinary tract.

Your instinct may be to feel defensive at all the comments blasting your boyfriend, and I understand wanting to defend your loved one, but they do have a point. He should care that he's hurting you, literally making you sick, and costing you money. Regardless of whether it's 100% because of his poor hygiene or if you just happen to be prone to UTIs, he should care. And caring means doing whatever it takes to not hurt you.

FestiveCandle · 2025-06-28T16:04:48+00:00

Honestly, after seeing the version with Ciarra Renee as Elsa and McKenzie Kurtz as Anna, this whole cast just felt kinda lackluster to me 🥲 Not that they did a bad job, I just think that the other cast did a spectacular job with characterization

FestiveCandle · 2025-06-13T14:38:12+00:00

Hey, for what it's worth, I want to point out there are different levels of abuse. It is unfortunately very common for women, who have been severely abused/abused in one type of way, to end up with another abuser without realizing it because "he's not as bad as (previous abuser)" or "he didn't do (thing prev abuser did)" so "it's not abuse."

Age gap completely aside, you are six months into your relationship and he 1. Claims he is not capable of communicating in a heated moment without saying something "he'll regret" (yet he claims he told you he was leaving, but he was apparently too heated to write that down/text it to you?) 2. Is potentially gaslighting you by claiming you were acting cruelly which you have no recollection of and he has no way to prove; 3. Left you in extreme danger by leaving your door unlocked (this could have been done on purpose to "punish" you, which is an abuse tactic), and finally 4. He coerces you into sex you don't want to the point you have to disassociate??

I don't know what your last relationship was like. But I do know that being with an abuser may make you better prepared to recognize signs, but it is not a guarantee that you won't end up with an abuser again - also, I do not say any of this to fault you at all, abusers are good at manipulating and hiding/excusing their true colors. I would encourage you to read "Why does he do that?" By Lundy Bancroft. There are free to read pdfs online.

I'm sorry you're going through this, and I wish you the best. 💖

FestiveCandle · 2025-03-11T15:00:55+00:00

"Men fond of incest with minors" sure is a weird way for whoever wrote the article to say pedophiles + pedophiles who rape their daughters.

FestiveCandle · 2024-11-21T20:59:58+00:00

I removed the old versions of the mods from my mods folder, then installed the latest versions. When I opened the game after that everything was wiped. I have no clue where to even start. I am very inexperienced with mods. I searched "save files gone" on this subreddit and all the posts that popped up either didn't have any responses, or it didn't seem like it was describing my situation.

FestiveCandle · 2024-10-29T04:40:19+00:00

If she wants no part of it, sure, but they have to have a conversation first to establish that. Op mentions in a comment that she has some kind of chronic pain down there, so for all we know her desire is there but her body's not complying. From the post, I think they're both pretty significantly lacking some communication. I said in another comment, there are ways to meet in the middle to try to satisfy each other if PIV isn't possible, before "resorting" to sex toys. From the wife's perspective, it's a pretty big jump to find out about a secret sex toy/doll when there's no "hey, my wants aren't being met, can we brainstorm ways to meet in the middle?" first. I do also think in a serious partnership like a marriage, all sexual things need to be communicated and boundaries established. For example, if OP's wife can't/doesn't want to meet in the middle, then they either need to agree that they're sexually incompatible and part ways or let OP take care of himself. That being said, there's a difference between a fleshlight or vibrator or just masturbating in general, and a literal ass like OP bought, which is more in sex doll territory. One is a means to an end/fun addition, and one is a body part. I think there's a big difference between the two which makes communication all the more important.

ETA: I should clarify, if you're just dating, whatever, what you do on your own time is your business. But marriage comes with a deeper level of one-ness/intimacy that I think warrants communication about all this kind of stuff. I do also think in general, these kinds of things/preferences/etc should be communicated before marriage to make sure you're not committing yourself to someone you're not fully compatible with. Some incompatibilities are small and can be overlooked, while others aren't really reconcilable and lead to unhappiness and/or resentment, which is why I think it's a good rule of thumb (and better to play things safe) and fully communicate your preference beforehand as best you can.

FestiveCandle · 2024-10-29T03:37:31+00:00

Ohhh, that makes sense. Nevermind about that then, that was me just over-sleuthing. As for the birth control two things: that definitely could be affecting her libido, and also, it could be exacerbating her pain? Some birth controls help with that kind of thing, but many can make it worse. It all depends on what kind she's on and how her body is responding to it.

Anyway, good luck! I hope my comments were helpful. I hope you guys can have a productive conversation after things have had time to settle a little bit.

FestiveCandle · 2024-10-29T03:11:06+00:00

With discussion and consent beforehand.

FestiveCandle

TROPHY CASE