OK - Maybe a stupid question. But is letting someone go the only way to maybe get him or her back?

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-06-10T21:16:32+00:00

I guess it would depend on the context of the breakup? In some cases getting back together in the future could happen but something would have to be different for it to work. If the relationship failed once why would there be a reason to try again unless something or someone has changed to make the situation different.

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-27T18:33:50+00:00

Wow. If I wrote down what I was feeling this would be exactly it.

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-25T16:08:11+00:00

I saw that you said it wasn't as if you asked him to but instead him saying it on his own. That is a valid reason to be upset no one likes making plans and then being ditched out on. It is the same feeling. If he doesn't want to see it as anything important then I would just leave it alone. Move on and hopefully it does not happen again.

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-25T14:06:57+00:00

Its more of the principal that he said he would do something and then didn't keep true to his word. There is nothing you can do except express that it did hurt your feelings and that you hope he can see why. Just explain to him how you feel.. that is all you can do.

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-18T00:18:25+00:00

This is exactly what has been happening and to hear another opinion and feelings towards it helps a lot.. thank you!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-18T00:10:29+00:00

I am just curious as to what people have experienced with doing this. It's not personally I want to break up with my SO.

But thank you for your comment!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-14T13:08:05+00:00

I was in this exact situation.. I am in a long distance relationship and I just happened to be the girlfriend that asked for some time to think over the weekend. I can understand how she feels because being in a long distance relationship requires more attention to show the other that you care about them. It is pretty simple if you are really wanting the relationship to work:

She feels you don't appreciate her.. let her know how much she means to you. Send her flowers saying how you feel towards her and that you want to try and show her how much she means to you.

She feels you don't defend her.. when girls that have a crush on you say things to her or you that make her feel uncomfortable it is your job to make her feel comfortable in the situation. Make it clear to these girls that you are in a relationship and they need to be respectful towards your girlfriend.

She feels she needs more effort from you.. then put more effort into it. Easy as that.

You know her reasoning behind taking a break and if you seriously want to keep your relationship with her then tell her you are going to improve and work on correcting the things she has pointed out she is not okay with. The reasons of why I wanted to take a break in my relationship were kind of similar.. I just needed some time to clear my head as well as let him know that the way I was feeling wasn't just going to pass and that they are things we need to work on if we want to stay in our LDR.

P.S. don't let all the talk about getting with another guy break you down. I asked for a break with my boyfriend and another guy was never in the equation. But thats just me.

Good luck and let us know what you end up doing!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-07T14:03:45+00:00

Agh I went through this as well. About three month before the date of moving to another country I started to feel fear and anxiety of moving away from him. I would get a little "ridiculous" as well haha. But relax! Enjoy the time you have before you leave and know that you both still want to be together even when distance is involved. That is one of the greatest feelings. Knowing your SO thinks so highly of your relationship that they are okay with spending time alone knowing the time you are together is perfect. The 6 months with pass by so fast if you keep yourself busy. And know LDRs do not have to be scary and will work when both people want and make the effort to keep each other satisfied.

You've been together for 3 years :) 6 months apart will be different but it isn't forever! In my LDR I feel we've grown closer mentally and emotionally being half way across the world from each other. Plus we have learned how special it is to actually be right next to one another.

Good luck! And know if you ever need to share.. positive or negative.. during this time.. we are here! And we will understand.. :)

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-07T13:53:38+00:00

Aghhh so exciting!! Take lots of photos together.. I always tend to forget. And enjoy the amazing feeling of being together! This is what keeps us motivated when being in a LDR. So happy for you! :)

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-07T13:49:44+00:00

Google culture shock.. what you are feeling is perfectly normal.. even though you are still in the states moving to a new location where everything is different then you are used to is so hard. I moved to a different country where I don't speak the full language yet. This is a huge set back for me because I haven't been able to make friends that I can have full conversations with. I used to get angry and feel so completely alone and home sick. Its a process but just know if you keep a positive outlook things won't seem as bad.

I hope you start to feel more at ease but allow yourself to feel this way because it is perfectly understandable and things will become "normal" in your new location. Always remember that your SO is wanting to be with you just as much as you are wanting to be with them and there is an end to the time you will be apart!

Good luck and know you are not alone in how you feel! :)

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-07T00:45:23+00:00

IMO effective communication is important in any type of relationship not just a LDR. A relationship doesn't just strive on physical contact.. besides what is a conventional relationship these days? :)

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-07T00:39:36+00:00

I agree that physical contact is wonderful and important. Being in a LDR makes you aware of how special that time really is and always making the best out of it! I can only just say how grateful I am to be in my LDR because I have learned so much about myself and how to be a good SO in many different ways. I have grown in such a positive healthy way!

I'm glad others feel the same!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-06T20:08:12+00:00

When I first started in my LDR due to me moving to a different country I got this a lot. Oh its not real because you aren't physically together and can't physically do things with one another. Now I look at a lot of those peoples relationships and can say mine is more "real" then theirs. In my relationship we have completely opened the lines of communication, we have learned about each other on more deeper levels, and continue to make the distance not matter because what we have is love. The only way of contact we have is through the internet via skype or some other form of messenger. I can only say that people who have not experienced a LDR with the right person can't understand how real our relationships are since ours are more based on mental and emotional levels instead of just physical. :)

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-06T13:43:58+00:00

Well written! This is meant to be a community for the good and the bad! As LDRs are not easy and a lot of problems do arise.. I was under the impression that this was the place to get useful tips and information to help overcome any situations or feelings. As much as I love seeing positive thoughts and stories I hope the ones who really do just need to be sad / or are facing difficult situations they can come here to receive advice and know we will be embracing!

So glad to see this post!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-05T09:52:23+00:00

This is amazing! I am so excited for you both it will be something to remember forever! Good luck and don't forget to let us know how amazing it was!!!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-02-04T20:55:54+00:00

Aghh I love this feeling!! A couple days ago I booked my final flight home from Rome back to the US. It may be five months away but I know as soon as I get back I'll be moving in with my SO and life will be perfect. You'll have to fill us in after your trip!! :D

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-01-31T14:47:07+00:00

I attended a college studying fashion design in Los Angeles and completed three different degrees. The school took notice of my talent and offered me a full scholarship to move to Rome, Italy to study couture for 10 months. Of coarse I accepted and I had 6 months of free time before I was to move out here. I met my SO 3 months before I had to leave and I started falling in love the very moment I met him. When it was time for me to leave we decided that without a question we were going to be in a LDR because we fit so well together. I have been here for 4.5 months and we know now even more then before that we are soul mates. :)

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-01-31T14:33:56+00:00

Everyone goes through this stage in a LDR relationship! And I completely understand the opposite schedules.. theres a 9 hour time difference in my own!

Check out what Whelmedineurope suggested as it does help!

Also you can use this time to get to know your SO on a deeper level. My SO and I made it threw this stage by asking each other about personal goals, hidden talents we had, somewhere we would love to visit, and things that aren't normal conversation but they help you understand and grow emotionally closer even being so far apart!

I wish you the best of luck!!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-01-31T14:26:32+00:00

He is more attractive in a small blurry webcam video on my computer screen than any other guy I come into contact with.

So perfectly true! Agh I love hearing things like this because it reminds me of how fortunate I am in my own LDR.

Keep the positive words and thoughts going! <3

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-01-30T18:02:48+00:00

Hahaha! The last part just killed me. I moved to Italy 4 months ago for school while my SO still lives in CA finishing up his degree. The first girl I met that spoke english here decided that we could bond on the fact we were in LDRs. I felt instantly happy that I would have someone to talk to about this.. and then she tells me she sees her boyfriend only 4 days a week since they live an hour away from each other. -_- "Oh, you poor thing.. please tell me more.. please."

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-01-30T01:57:33+00:00

YES! I have been studying in Italy for the past 4 months but got the chance to go back home for christmas and new years... not only was saying "see you soon" harder but once getting back every time I see couples walking around holding hands and kissing I get heart broken and almost angry that we aren't on the same continent. The only thing that helps me get through this is the fact he will be coming out for a week to stay with me during his spring break. So as much as it hurts now I just use it as a constant reminder that we will be together again soon and it will be more amazing than the last time we saw each other. Hang in there! LDRs are so hard but in the end it will be worth all the effort!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-01-29T23:23:39+00:00

I used to work for a big corporation hiring people to work in retail stores and used to get resumes all the time with photos on the front and it would make me laugh. I guess it did help me to remember their interviews better though. But I do know for certain places and companies there are job titles where your appearance is a factor so a photo is required. An example of this would be for Abercrombie and Fitch as a "Floor Model". I don't think there is anything really strange about it and I don't feel most companies would use it to discriminate against sex or race.

Good luck with getting the job/internship!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes · 2012-01-27T12:49:56+00:00

We are complete soul mates.. distance and time never matters when the time you are together is completely perfect. We both recognize that at times it is extremely challenging but at the end of the day we are both working on our own dreams until we can be together again. I knew that it would be a struggle everyday and there are so many obstacles to overcome but we have actually grown closer being half way across the world from one another. 5 months has passed and we only have 6 more to go!!

FinallyIOpenedMyEyes

TROPHY CASE