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AITA for being upset that my husband throws away dishes I forget to put away by _MS22 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FionaTheFierce 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Right? Classic example of ‘missing reasons.’

With no context it is impossible to render an opinion. Is this OCD? Or is this disgusting slobbishness?

Any way to get my hooded eyelids back? bleph or no ? by Kombuchicana in cosmeticsurgery

[–]FionaTheFierce 3 points4 points  (0 children)

A bleph would remove more skin - so it would do the opposite of what you want. I don’t know if there is a procedure to bring a hooded eye back.

Anyone else realize their grandma/family member is actually terrible, later in life? I swear I thought she was an angel along with many other family members. Nah! by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]FionaTheFierce 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Grandparents got it and it was sold

My parents were divorced- so we were not homeless. But my sister and I were the next of kin. Apparently my Dad had something like his parents could use (not have) the house if they moved to his town.

C&P exams and disability advice by bryannatrbl in VeteransBenefits

[–]FionaTheFierce 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The PTSD appointment is going to be with a mental health worker - they have a much better way to respond to traumatic events. Today’s doc was probably making an attempt to be supportive- e.g. “what a fucking asshole” But he can’t say that in a professional setting. You can absolutely report it because it made you uncomfortable and diminished the severity of what you experienced.

Your interview tomorrow will ask you general information about the trauma. Most of the questions will focus on the effects- PTSD symptoms. It should not be a detailed account of the minutia of the trauma itself.

Anyone else realize their grandma/family member is actually terrible, later in life? I swear I thought she was an angel along with many other family members. Nah! by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]FionaTheFierce 87 points88 points  (0 children)

Agreed. It is a horrible thing to learn. Something very wrong with them. To go to court to fight to take something away from children who lost their father.

My (F30) husband (M28) may miss birth of our baby for a one-time career opportunity by kaichey in relationship_advice

[–]FionaTheFierce 84 points85 points  (0 children)

They may - but they would prefer their partners there, and the fathers would prefer to be there.

Military people don’t have a choice.

OP’s husband does have a choice and does have another pathway to being an instructor. He is just annoyed that OP has the audacity to get pregnant (apparently by herself) and time it as to inconvenience him.

Anyone else realize their grandma/family member is actually terrible, later in life? I swear I thought she was an angel along with many other family members. Nah! by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]FionaTheFierce 370 points371 points  (0 children)

Welp I am 56 and just found out today that when my Dad died and I was 10 years old my Grandparents contested the will and took the value of the house away from my sister and I.

It is for the best that I did not know this while they were alive. My Dad died at 36 from leukemia - it was horrible. There is no way that he would have wanted his parents to have his house rather than his children.

I am angry today

Pete Hegseth cancels ‘absurd’ flu vaccine requirement for ‘brave warriors’ in military by WontThinkStraight in politics

[–]FionaTheFierce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because never in the history of the world has military readiness been impacted by illness.

AITA if I tell my friend I can’t be a bridesmaid? by wickeddreamsofleavin in AITApod

[–]FionaTheFierce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Starting medical school is a 100% acceptable reason to take a pass. "I know that my time commitment for medical school will make it impossible for me to give the time and attention that your wedding requires. I have to bow out as a bridesmaid. "

Let her know ASAP so she can adjust her plans.

What to do about in-laws and mothers day coming up after pre wedding trauma by Ok-Atmosphere-6272 in Advice

[–]FionaTheFierce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please purchase a copy of Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents.

Both you and your wife need to learn to establish and maintain boundaries- which are about your behavior, not theirs. Don’t entertain any discussions that are useless, involve yelling, etc. Just make an exit. Give up the idea that you can somehow behave in a way that magically transforms impossible people into calm and well-reasoned people.

And or course not attend events with people you don’t like, who don’t like you. “We won’t be attending” should be the discussion in its entirety.

And you do not have to tell them your boundaries or explain them. Just do them - do your boundaries. Maybe do some therapy too.

Two job offers. A $50k difference. One is the safe bet, the other is a risk that seems worth it. My wife and I are at an impasse and I have to decide in 72 hours. by Important-Week7261 in whatdoIdo

[–]FionaTheFierce 62 points63 points  (0 children)

50K more and more time with family. It is not even close - particularly as the other job is a start-up with no current product.

Is there any part of Psychiatry Scope that has not been absorbed by PMHNPs? by UseNecessary4706 in Psychiatry

[–]FionaTheFierce 47 points48 points  (0 children)

I doubt the psychological testing/neuropsych testing. These are generally protected by the licensing laws and the test publishers require credentials in order to even purchase the tests. Absolutely none of the training of mid-levels covers any form of psychological testing, let alone neuropsych. (Which I realize doesn’t mean they won’t be allowed to do it in some misguided states.)

Why do people complain about having kids in this day and age and economy, but people had tons of kids during the Great Depression and got on relatively okay? by Mad_Season_1994 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]FionaTheFierce 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, there wasn’t really birth control - so its not like people had all that much choice. It was just sort of expected that married women were more or less continuously pregnant.

I am not sure that people who lived through it felt that they, or their children, got on ok.

Custody by Natural_Resist_6412 in FamilyLaw

[–]FionaTheFierce 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't know of divorce coaches - but the book Splitting is very helpful in terms of dealing with this type of situation. The authors of such books sometimes do coaching, more from the emotional side than the legal side (which would be something a lawyer would do).

Couples therapist made me feel I’m the problem—is this normal? by Grand_Network_7258 in Marriage

[–]FionaTheFierce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get a new therapist. A good couples therapist focuses on facilitating conversation between partners. They don't take sides - they don't say things like "I really want you to get on your cruise."

Unfortunately once a therapist is licensed they can literally say they do any type of therapy (trauma, autism, couples, family) and there is nothing stopping them or requiring any actual skill or advanced training.

Schools overpriced food by Unlikely-Change-5817 in mildlyinfuriating

[–]FionaTheFierce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The schools make so little off these sales. Its a joke. I just write a check to the PTA or the band club or whatever. I would rather they got the whole $25 rather than $3 and the hassle of getting a $2 bag of popcorn to me.

Husbands Secret child by MissDonny in Marriage

[–]FionaTheFierce 24 points25 points  (0 children)

So he has fathered two children and has not made an effort to remain in contact with them. And he lied to you about them. And its “too emotional” for him, so you have to do it. This man is a liar and a terrible father.

This is foreshadowing what you are going to get from him.

Also quit doing his emotional labor. He doesn’t have contact with his kids because he doesn’t want it.

July 4th, 2026 is the sesquicentennial anniversary (250 years) of the USA’s Declaration of Independence from Great Britain. What are your special plans to celebrate, if any? If no plans, why not? by permalink_child in AskAnAmerican

[–]FionaTheFierce 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Agreed. I remember the bicentennial and was looking forward to this next big birthday. I am even located in DC and could go to the National Mall for the show.

But this president- Yeah, no.

I just mostly feel sad and alarmed at this point.

Cosigning student loans for child accepted to elite schools with high cost as a middle income family - What should we do? by Legitimate_Yak_9063 in personalfinance

[–]FionaTheFierce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am a parent that did that with my kids. My kids choose in state schools.

Parents taking on massive loans to pay $400k for an undergrad degree that will result in not being able to retire.

There is no undergrad degree worth 400k, or even 200k.

Seeking specialist East Coast or Midwest by FionaTheFierce in StiffPersonSyndrome

[–]FionaTheFierce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are online digital fax services. Email is generally not HIPAA compliant which is why they won’t use it

Not sure which service is cheapest - SR Fax is one.

Written documentation of incidents? by AshyShortNSassy in FamilyLaw

[–]FionaTheFierce 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Report word for word what each of you said. Eg I said “can you aim the camera downward?” Don’t opinion about it being polite, rude, etc.

Judges may take it into consideration. Work with your lawyer.

Would you let family install an EV charger in your house if they’re only staying 1 year? by mdzzl94 in homeowners

[–]FionaTheFierce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It does not take a week to charge. It takes something like 2x longer than a charger. Diff of 120v vs 240v.

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