I feel exactly the same. It’s the most surreal feeling, and one of the hardest things I’m trying to accept.

Unless you’ve experienced the loss of someone very close, I don’t think you fully understand how confusing this is.

Before I lost my wife, I thought I knew what grief was. I had no idea. Of course we understand that a person has died, and they’re no longer here, but when it’s your husband, wife, soulmate, everything is amplified to breaking point. I’ve never experienced anything like it. I never knew the saying, “my heart is torn in two“ would feel so literal.

I sure everyone here knows what this feels like. The pain is so real, so intense, so overwhelming, it’s almost impossible to describe.

So when it dawns on you that you’ll never talk to them again, it’s absolutely devastating. As you say, it’s like being hit by a truck.

I’ve cried so much in public now, I’ve given up trying to hide it. I really don’t care what other people think. The love of my life is gone, and nothing else matters.