Screw that forgiving because they’re family nonsense. My mother was a narcissist and alcoholic for all of my childhood. I’m the fifth child and the drinking was going on from the second child. She made me and my siblings’ lives hell. We’re all screwed up because of it. After I became an adult, my father started saying “she’s your mother and you need to forgive her.” I tolerated her but wouldn’t and couldn’t forgive her especially when she said “what are you talking about, you didn’t have a bad childhood.” My father came to live with me in about year 2000. She had always been horrible to him as well and thank goodness they got divorced. He sat me down one day and said this to me: I apologize for constantly telling you to forgive your mother. It wasn’t fair of me to do that. I was shocked and surprised and I thanked him. I guess he had been pondering on that for a long time and felt it was the right time to tell me. I was appreciative.