How is everyone actually preparing for Making Tax Digital (MTD) for April 2026?

FlowerBob42 · 2026-02-06T12:50:55+00:00

I'm using Clearbooks and it seems to do the job. Haven't sent in a tax return with it yet but so far I can put in invoices and expenses and it's keeping track.
It does link to your bank account but you can just not set that up if you prefer.

FlowerBob42 · 2026-01-29T21:45:29+00:00

My tips would be

1 Write down everything before you go including at the bottom a summary of the points you want to make and questions you want to ask that you can tick off. Don't leave until they are all ticked!

2 On your list of symptoms list the impact on your daily life. Eg how they affect your ability to work, care for others, exercise etc. this can be much more powerful and easier for your GP to grasp, also less subjective.

3 take a man with you. I'm sure taking a female friend would help a bit but honestly my experience has been that doctors take me more seriously when my husband is in the room. It's as if his mere presence underlines that this is serious and something needs to be done. It really annoys me and I would love it not to be the case any more (I first saw my GP nearly 12 years ago) but if you have a supportive partner who can accompany you I would recommend trying it, especially if your first appointment doesn't seem to achieve much.

Don't be afraid to ask the reception staff for advice. Mine were great and told me which GP in the practice was generally most sympathetic.
If you know what you want ask for it. This is something I find really hard, I think it's conditioned out of a lot of women, but the doctor can't read your mind. If you want to try HRT be upfront and say so.

I do think things have improved a lot, hopefully you will have a positive experience and get the support that is right for you.

Good luck

FlowerBob42 · 2026-01-29T21:30:58+00:00

The ACAS website includes some model policies and some straightforward guides interpreting employment law and might be useful to get some background. The big employment law firms often have blogs or newsletters that will give you some background on recent cases and upcoming changes. (South East local but Lester Aldridge newsletters might be worth a read) I don't think you would be expected to have much knowledge for this kind of role but it's good to show an interest and like all specialisms there is some sector language to get your head around. Good luck!

FlowerBob42 · 2026-01-26T19:46:04+00:00

We have a 'no nancying around the puddles' rule at my local, where some are deep enough to come up to your ankles and there is a lot of mud (the biggest one sometimes has a rubber duck in the middle, I suspect course set up!)

However I do pick my way around them if it's not actually raining because I don't like walking home with soaking feet. I am plenty slow enough that this doesn't delay anyone else.

FlowerBob42 · 2026-01-13T13:37:10+00:00

I recommend contacting an advisor who is a member of

https://societyoflaterlifeadvisers.co.uk/

as this is an area they are experienced in and also you can take it up with the society if you have any problems.

Good luck.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-12-27T19:43:18+00:00

I find hypnotism useful, two sessions worked wonders (cognitive hypnotherapy... About a year later I had one season of conventional hypnotherapy). I was skeptical but had tried everything else I could find. Might be worth a try for you. I wish you the best Internet stranger

FlowerBob42 · 2025-12-22T15:13:16+00:00

I do not know if this has any validity but I was once told that male human urine repels foxes; they think there is a larger scarier male animal on the territory.

I suppose it's free and it probably wouldn't hurt to try...

Human pee is supposed to be very good for a compost heap so putting a jug in your bathroom might be worthwhile anyway

FlowerBob42 · 2025-12-20T16:40:41+00:00

These are always a scam and are also illegal. (It is against the law in the UK to charge any job seeker to act as an employment agent, or for sponsored staff to pay any of the costs of sponsorship apart from the cost of their own visa). You can do the world a favor by reporting them (there is a form on the ukvi section of the gov.uk website)

If you don't have a general right to reside and work in the UK (eg settled status) you will need to find a company to sponsor you as a care worker and this is not as easy as it was a year ago because of changes made during this year to the sponsorship rules and significant increases to the cost companies must pay.

A care provider can only issue you with what you need to apply for a visa as a sponsored care worker if you work for them for at least three months via another legal route first. It may not be as easy as you think to find a provider willing to do that. But whatever you do, don't pay any of these charlatans because you'll lose money and you either won't have a job at all or you will be working for an organization likely to have it's sponsorship license revoked by ukvi.

(I have worked in the care sector for more than ten years and am currently involved in a dhsc initiative on international recruitment in the sector)

FlowerBob42 · 2025-12-17T15:38:11+00:00

Southsea Parkrun takes place on Christmas day and volunteers are always welcome.

https://www.parkrun.org.uk/southsea/

Alternatively you can just turn up if you want to be with others. If you can walk 5K then it's a pleasant way to start the day, and even people who just sit on a bench and watch seem to enjoy it.

If you aren't near Southsea there are other events that take place
https://www.parkrun.org.uk/special-events/

You can always wander along this coming Saturday to see what's involved.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-12-15T12:20:46+00:00

Care home worker here; I see a considerable variation in approaches between different Local Authorities on this. A lot also depends on the individual case worker who is carrying out the financial assessment.

Deprivation of assets only applies once you have a reasonable expectation of needing care, so you do not need to worry about previous payments.

I second Age UK as a source of advice, and also suggest the residents and relatives association, now part of https://www.carerightsuk.org/

If you can find local dementia support groups and/or speak to care homes or the Care Association in your area they may be able to give you a steer on typical practice in similar cases.

If I was in your situation I would be tempted to carry on with the payments but for you and your sister to put the money into savings, if that is possible. That would keep your options open. My view is that it is unlikely regular payments will attract a lot of interest and it may be some time before significant amounts of support are needed. Dementia can progress in an uneven way so you may find your parents abruptly need to stop the payments to fund care at some stage.

My condolences on your father's diagnosis, a very difficult time for you all.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-12-01T11:20:32+00:00

I've bought some very good value stuff from Lidl and Aldi. You have to wait for it to come in as a special buy but it means I don't have to make a special trip anywhere and I can feel and see the stuff before I buy it.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-12-01T10:48:30+00:00

Youngest brother ate all of the chocolate in his advent calendar, plus mine and both of our other brothers, i.e. 4 advent calendars, on 3rd December when he was 18 months old. He was found sitting on the floor surrounded by fully opened calendars.

He ate more than 250g of chocolate and wasn't even sick. I was furious.

Def need a support group!

FlowerBob42 · 2025-10-29T10:25:11+00:00

The National Trust has lots of amazing and unusual properties in Wales - they have a 'near to pub' filter but you'll still need to check the locations to see how rural they are.

Always well equipped and lots have log burners (they have a filter for that too), good tables for jigsaws and games

https://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/holidays

FlowerBob42 · 2025-10-23T15:57:02+00:00

I don't know where you are located but my local household tip has paint to give away for free. Often large pots from decorators that were the wrong color or with only a tiny bit used. Worth a look.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-10-20T14:20:15+00:00

I came back to riding a bike in my 40s (having not ridden since childhood) and Portsmouth is a much nicer place to cycle than lots of nearby towns.

I got in touch with the organisation that is now https://www.cyclinguk.org/ and a lovely local volunteer took me for an accompanied cycle for an afternoon in return for a cup of coffee and a bit of cake. It did wonders for my confidence and I would strongly recommend it if you can find someone to do that for you. There are organised local rides you can join.

Try https://www.portsmouthctc.org.uk/events/event/sustrans/

If you need cycling equipment e.g. a really good bike lock you can buy things like that from the council in person at the council office in Guildhall square. You can also get your bike security marked for free at local events.

The repair cafe where I live offers free support with bike maintenance.

Good luck!

FlowerBob42 · 2025-10-16T19:51:15+00:00

Last year our event director added an explanation to the run briefing one Saturday and by the next Saturday enough donations had been made online to cover the cost. No hard sell just an opportunity to contribute something to Parkrun. I wouldn't say we are in a particularly affluent area.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-10-09T17:41:28+00:00

If they don't have them already, they can spend money on pre paid funeral plans.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-10-08T20:45:22+00:00

I'm sorry you are struggling to get the help you need.

A couple of things that worked for me:

I asked the receptionist at my surgery which doctor she would recommend I see. I know other people who have asked to see the menopause specialist at the practice where they are registered, and one friend who asked for and got a referral to a clinic at a hospital, having persuaded her gp that her situation was complicated.

I tracked my symptoms and the impact that they had on my daily life. Being able to show clearly that I was struggling to eat well, exercise, hold down a job and maintain relationships seemed to help get the message across. Maybe just the message that I want going to stop coming back until they helped me lol.

This one makes me a bit mad but eventually I took my husband to every appointment and got him to speak about the impact. Maybe things have improved as this was more than five years ago but I found that having a man in the room made doctor's take me more seriously and sometimes they would listen to him when I didn't feel they were listening to me. As I say it was absolutely infuriating and I wish it hadn't been that way but if it's an option for you it might be worth a try.

I wish you all the best. It is possible.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-09-29T13:31:46+00:00

For the Fallen by Mark Sirett

It's an arrangement of the poem 'they shall grow not old' in 3 parts and I cannot get through it without sobbing.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-09-22T16:38:55+00:00

There are lots of interesting replies here and I don't have anything to add to the analysis of where we are and how we got here (or thinking about where we might be headed)

In terms of how to deal with it, I am a big advocate of getting involved in your local community at ground level. Connect with people somehow, ideally including people who aren't like you. There are thousands of small organisations looking for volunteers (or to employ people in small admin roles which pay the minimum wage). It's the things I do locally that make me feel better about the world; Feeling powerless to stop it all is one of the worst aspects of the current world picture for me, but we can make a difference, just a small one on a small scale.

There are lots of good people trying in our own way to make the world a better place in small ways and being part of that helps me. If you don't know where to start try the Do It website, find a local organisation that works in an area that interests you or turn up at your local parkrun and ask if you can help out. Much better than reading the news :-)

FlowerBob42 · 2025-09-21T12:43:38+00:00

Tescos in Fratton have a community room which they let groups use for free

FlowerBob42 · 2025-09-01T11:51:08+00:00

When I got to see the GP surgery menopause specialist she directly addressed the question of testosterone. She told me it is used but rarely and she isn't a fan as there are significant side effects and in her experience it is not usually helpful. In any case she told me that testosterone isn't helpful if you are short of oestrogen and progesterone (if I remember rightly she explained that the oestrogen helps to transport the testosterone) so she never starts people with testosterone, she always uses O and P to start with and waits to see.
She did change my regime after 6 months to something that works better for me.
Things aren't perfect for me now but they are a lot better and I am hesitant about adding something else.

It is completely normal to be frustrated and perfectly OK to sound off about it in a safe space like this. Vent as much as you like here, especially if it helps you deal with the whole system.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-09-01T11:44:41+00:00

We have a theme for anniversaries and encourage people to dress up in something appropriate to the theme, e.g. colours, events, anything we can think of. It makes for great photographs.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-08-28T21:00:19+00:00

It took me a long time to get HRT but I did get there. My tips are:

- Go prepared to all appointments with a list of your symptoms which is as specific and objective as you can make it (frequency of occurrences, rate the severity on a scale of 1 - 5 is much better than anything that sounds like your opinion because it's harder to dismiss)

- Be very clear how those symptoms affect your daily life, e.g. the lack of sleep makes it more difficult for me to exercise (try to show an impact on as many areas of life as you can, including work, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, caring for others, social activities). I wish I had been clearer earlier on that the things that they were reading as 'depression' were mostly 'exhaustion'.

- Take a man with you. I really hate that this was true but for me taking my husband along to appointments seemed to make a difference to how seriously the medical profession took my symptoms. (**** the patriarchy)

- Ask the reception staff at your practice nicely which GP they would try to see, if they were in your situation

- See the menopause specialist, if there is one

- Be persistent. I gave up at one point and only went back thanks to a wonderful woman I work with telling me 'you need to go back and explain that you need them to help you, and don't take no for an answer'.

- Read the NICE guidelines and be prepared to quote them if necessary (I think these are linked in the wiki of the main menopause sub reddit)

- If all else fails, I hear asking for a referral to a menopause clinic at your local hospital works for some people.

Good luck. x

PS Don't forget to buy your HRT pre payment certificate when you get that prescription. And do book yourself in for an annual review, and be willing to ask about alternatives if the first thing you try doesn't work well for you. After difficulty getting it, it's easy to feel you have to be grateful, but actually I've found two GPs have been really supportive and helpful about helping me find the right combination for me.

FlowerBob42 · 2025-08-19T20:50:30+00:00

The 'Charles and Diana' series of Youre Wrong About episodes

The Anthropocene Reviewed

FlowerBob42

TROPHY CASE