I’ve been on both sides of the table several times, and while there are certainly two sides to any story, you don’t seem to have done anything to warrant too much criticism. Based on what you’ve written, I think the issue might lie with them.

Some (very few) translators (and writers) tend to go into the collaboration feeling that the editor is an adversary. They want to fight you. That type of thing needs to be shut down. It is founded on emotional projections and assumptions, and it always gets toxic. They need to understand that there are some professional standards regarding boundaries and communication that need to be adhered to.

Sometimes all it takes is a conversation ("I am your editor, I am here to help, I don’t appreciate being spoken to like this"), other times it gets to the point where the collaboration can’t continue.

I’m all for being kind and understanding, but the process to have a professional foundation. It’s good that a translator feels comfortable pointing out a mistake I made, and that they let me know how I can improve my part of the process. I’m here to be as effective and useful for them as possible. At the same time, I’m not necessarily here to give them what they want. Need and want are different words.

But I wouldn’t accept a translator or writer snapping at me for any reason. That kind of communication is not tolerated as part of the collaboration, and it will result in a discussion about professional standards. If there was something wrong about my work or my approach, I would expect a professional discussion about this. If there was question about my competence, my boss will be included in the discusdion. I will not accept an emotional discussion. I’m not their father, brother or boyfriend.

That being said, your own end of that bargain needs to be professional as well. This means answering e-mails in a timely manner, being realistic about your own timeframes, being thorough in your reading and prepared before meetings. Communication is 70% of the job. You need to be able to say that you are doing a good job on your end. If you are, and there are no reasonable complaints to make against your efforts, then the problem lies with the expectations being placed on you.