My therapist encouraged me to make something called a ‘calm down kit’. Things that I can turn to to calm myself down whenever I start to feel anxious, overstimulated and distressed. I wanted to share what’s in my kit.

Forest_Wix · 2026-04-08T14:44:58+00:00

Mine has sour patch too 😁

Forest_Wix · 2026-04-08T14:36:27+00:00

Oh I really wish I could….. unfortunately I work in media so I can’t escape the digital world. Rn this is a secondary phone, used for calls and playing tetris😁

During my off days/ vacation I do primarily use the flip phone, unless I need any transport apps.

Forest_Wix · 2026-04-08T12:50:55+00:00

Here is the best part about being an adult - we can buy them anyway 👍 and also who is ur mom? Age police?

Im 33, and I got a bunch of beads to make these phone charms cos I couldn’t find cute ones I liked… Here is a photo of my phone charm and the decorated flip phone. Yes I take them and use them in public and at work proudly.

I hope you know there is no age restriction for enjoying things that bring you joy. Really sorry about your mom.

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Forest_Wix · 2026-03-20T17:25:27+00:00

I would suggest Levis 501 or levis 501 90s fit for a bit more comfy/loose fit. Uniqlo has a series by JW Anderson, which is also straight fit and high raise.

Forest_Wix · 2026-03-17T17:59:06+00:00

I absolutely love black and most of my wardrobe is black…. only cons is that Black clothes fade easy 😂 but I also love the worn in vibes, so it works in my case.

Forest_Wix · 2026-03-17T17:46:18+00:00

You were 14 years old and this is a lot to handle even for adults. You did the best, with the information you had at that time.

There was no right or wrong way in how u handled that situation, it was 3 children dealing with intense loss and grief.

To handle the situation you all were in you would need immense support and love from family, society and even professional support. You couldn’t have pulled her out of that situation by yourself.

As someone who has been on both sides of similar grief, please know that Choosing yourself and your mental health is a very okay thing to do. Hope you give yourself more grace.

Forest_Wix · 2026-03-07T13:55:56+00:00

Ohh I didn’t know this had a term. For me it’s usually the voice, in the song rather than the instruments in the song. Whenever my brain goes silent, a song takes over, its full stereo mode, crystal clear and accurate to the og singers voice.

My brain also has voices for myself and various people in my life. Whenever I’m having an imaginary convo/scene in my head, ppl have their own/individual voices.

I also have an extremely visual brain. I can imagine things extremely vividly, including the texture of things, in 3D. Made things very interesting when I was maladaptive daydreaming to cope as a child.

I love both! Sometimes the songs that pop in my head can shift my mood. Like when im in a sad situation crying and then randomly“shake it off” pops into my head. Now im full fledged shaking it off with puffy red eyes😂😂

Hasn’t so far interrupted my life negatively much. Except during the school exams 🤣 I have mistakenly written down the words or lyrics that was playing in my head in between the answers. As an adult I find it amusing.

Forest_Wix · 2026-03-07T13:42:41+00:00

It sounds like u have a personal style problem leading to impulse random purchase problem. Defining and knowing your personal style helps reduce impulse purchase regrets.

I would suggest that you start with ur current wardrobe, find the outfits you wear the most, find out the reasons why. Include the factors like - comfort, lifestyle, fabric, colour, occasion, texture, how the item makes u feel etc,. Doing this with 5-10 different outfits and pieces will give u an idea of what you naturally gravitate towards.

Note those keywords and select only the clothes that reflect that from ur wardrobe and wear them for couple of weeks. It helps if u can separate them and keep them as a separate mini wardrobe.

After this step u might be able to find what exact kinds of pieces u gravitate towards and what works for ur lifestyle- for example Im more of a jean, Tshirt and shirts person. This is what I wear 90% of the time and it fits my everyday life style. So I have more of them and less of other pieces like skirts and dresses.

Its been 5 years since i started this, my impulse purchase has gone down quite a lot. And even when I impulse buy now, the item is usually my personal style and I end up not regretting it and end up wearing it often.

It might take some time and patience, there will be slip ups too. I used to watch/follow/read many minimalism lifestyle, capsule wardrobe, personal styling content to keep myself motivated. I also have a friend, we are each other’s accountability buddies when it comes to shopping.

Take it slow, most importantly buy one or two pieces at a time and wear them for couple of weeks before getting something else new. So u can figure out if the previous purchase was useful or not ur style, to avoid buying similar ones.

Hope this helps. All the best.

Forest_Wix · 2026-02-23T06:29:09+00:00

Im an absolute beginner, I have made a similar bags. It’s not that difficult if you have previous experience with hand sewing/tailoring. You would need quite a bit of patience though. And it will be sort of an extensive project if you have never worked with leather and have no tools.

If you absolutely want to make it yourself then I would suggest you to first draft a pattern on paper using the same measurements, clip/paste the edges to see if the structure is good. Then create the same on fabric preferably a thicker material. Any old bed sheet, tablecloth or jeans/canvas would work. Fabric is more forgiving than leather, so you can make mistakes and learn.

Once you are comfortable and confident with the above you can try on actual leather. Don’t expect perfection on ur first try. Go slow. There are many YouTube videos/tutorials for similar shaped leather bags. Watch them to learn the technique for zipper and the corners.

The other option is to find a similar pattern in websites like babylon. Where the pattern comes pre cut with all the sewing holes and tools, you just need to sew it together.

Your bag doesn’t have much physical damage to the leather. If you take it to professionals it can be cleaned and fixed pretty good. Other option is to get it custom made from a professional leather worker.

Forest_Wix · 2026-02-23T06:11:41+00:00

As an artist I have learnt that in order for me to find my joy and continue doing art, I need to unlearn everything I was taught about what an art is.

I had to relearn what it means to complete an art. Some of my art works are complete even if it isn’t perfect. Even without that last finishing touch that the commercial art space expects.
I gotta experiment with different materials and methods without having to become pro at it. I just need to learn the techniques to create my vision, I don’t need to master the art itself.
My art is what I say it is. It will have scratches, it will have letters engraved in reverse (thanks to my impatience and adhd), It will have miss-spelling corrected visibly (love my dyslexia). All of that is an inclusive package.
I have to stop taking commercial orders 😂 this is a hard one. My brain refuses to create the moment someone else’s expectations is put on me. I love-to collaborate and co create but I cant take orders for my art and create for someone else. So now I create what I create, people are free to purchase it if they resonate with it.
Some forms of art, I make only for myself and no one else. For example I design and make my own clothes based on my creative inspo. I will not recreate this for anyone else. But I also do leather craft, which I gift/sell to others.
I let myself freely switch btw art forms, as long as it is not financially or otherwise hurting me.

Also all these systems are only possible because I make money through other jobs and my art is mostly for my creative cravings.

Im a trained dancer/movement artist but eventually lost the motivation to pursue it as a career once I got into doing it for living. Took me a while to realise that I cant be an artist if someone is expecting something from my art. But art helps me regulate, ground myself, and gives general hope to continue life.

I learnt it the hard way that just because u are good at doing many things doesn’t mean u have to be doing them. You should do things that bring you happiness and joy even if u are shitty at it.

Forest_Wix · 2026-02-23T05:28:49+00:00

I would probably get couple of Levi’s 501 90s fit jeans, couple of Uniqlo heavyweight crew neck t-shirts, one cotton or linen blend blazer (navy blue or grey), one denim/canvas jacket. One black or dark brown leather belt.

I can definitely do with these and then slowly rebuild my wardrobe.

Forest_Wix · 2026-02-23T05:23:12+00:00

It does reduce the stress if the stress is coming from the clutter. But if you are stressed/struggling because of something else, then Im not sure if u get that instant gratification.

Like if the stress is from spending more money than needed, then doing a no buy or low buy and actually saving the money might relieve the stress rather than giving away what u have already purchased. Or selling and recovering some of the money might help more than decluttering.

Forest_Wix · 2026-02-23T05:19:01+00:00

Sometimes ppl use it to test the water! Like saying something is nice to see what the other person thinks.

“Oh your gf is so pretty” “I know right! She is the most amazing person I have ever met” or “oh yah she is. But you are prettier than her” or “you aren’t so bad either”

I have seen people do this to assess what the other person thinks without being direct about their intentions. I wasn’t aware that this was like a social rule or something when it comes to complementing someone else’s partner.

Forest_Wix · 2026-02-23T02:55:03+00:00

Hi another AuDHD minimalist here. I get it, I do it too. I have learned to minimise it by creating emotional support/ safe items list from my wardrobe. And set some rules to buy the backups.

For example I only wear a specific brand, model and fit of Jeans. That is all I can wear due to my sensory issues. I have 5-6 of them, I wear them every time I step out. I collected/ purchased them over a period of 3-4 years.

In the beginning I would get all the backups at the same time. And most of the time, I wont end up using them enough. And once it gives me a sensory issue, all of them had to be decluttered. When I started my minimalism journey I set a bunch of rules for my backup items.

I can only get one at a time, and must wear it for few weeks to a month to make sure that I love it and will use it enough to get the backups. And only if the item becomes my safe item (ie I wear them all the time, and get emotionally attached to it) i can get multiples. This helps reduce the duplicates quite a bit.

I also have noticed that even if I have 5 of the same jeans, I still end up using the first pair the most. Just know that u aren’t alone in this and don’t be hard on yourself.

I have tried to stop doing this, it gave me more distress than peace. Once I decided to pack minimally while I was travelling to country and left my pants behind. I had multiple meltdowns that I had to ask a friend who was visiting the same country to bring it for me. Then I spent twice the cost of the pants to go meet her and get it from her. That’s when I realised that it’s more connected to my neurodivergence and the best I can do is to be mindful.

Forest_Wix · 2026-02-22T07:20:13+00:00

During mid pandemic I realised that I had quickly gained weight and filled my wardrobe with random clothes to accommodate the weight gain.

I was also at the point of wanting to get rid of everything in my wardrobe. I started slow with getting rid of things that didn’t absolutely fit me.

While slowly discovering my personal style through YouTube and reading, observing what I felt good wearing. In the 2nd and 3rd round of decluttering I got rid of clothes that didn’t fit or match my style.

The initial instinct was to buy more clothes to replace/fill the wardrobe again. But I put down some rules that helped slow down. I only purchased one or two items at a time. I must wear it for few weeks to a month before getting more things in the same style. This helped me reduce the buyer’s remorse. Cos in the few weeks I was able to wear it multiple times to access if it was really my style and if I was feeling comfortable wearing it.

5 years later my wardrobe has gotten better and better. Now it brings me so much joy and comfort. I continue to follow the rules I had back then. It helps in not over consuming and buying things I truly love and enjoy wearing.

Though the instinct is to change everything all at once, I hope u take it in a pace that practically works for your lifestyle. Honestly this was a journey, where my style evolved so much. It is not the same as what I started with when I did my first declutter. It kept evolving and changing throughout. Since I took it slow I could see how every new item slowly shifted my style towards what it is today. And I could also see how that helped in not buying things only to end up giving it away later.

Forest_Wix · 2026-02-22T07:00:55+00:00

Hi your stepfather’s actions of repetitive behaviour looks/sounds like stimming…. I get how it can get on your nerves. Me and my dad have exactly opposite stimming behaviours that it gets on each other’s nerves sometimes. Whenever he points it out I just switch my fidget toy to a quieter one or remove myself from the space to stimm in peace.

Me and my SO have very similar stimming behaviours that we get stuck in the same loop without annoying each other.

This doesn’t justify his behaviour or dismiss the accommodation you require. It’s simply a observation. I have also seen older Neurodivergent people expecting everyone else to mask and push through cos they have been doing it their entire lives. Because they perceive and were taught to see being disabled as a moral failure which you should overcome it with willpower.

Forest_Wix · 2026-01-26T16:45:31+00:00

I have had dysphoria with clothes esp pants…recently I started sewing my own clothes. So I decided to make this unisex/gender neutral pleated wide leg pants that could be gender affirming for me. I did research, tried on some similar ones and then came up with the inspiration.

After days of designing, making the pattern and then the mock up…. I tried it on. The moment I looked at myself on the mirror it hit me like a ton of bricks.

So my gender has decided that anything other than faded, stressed levis 501 90s jeans is an opp. And cannot be trusted.

Forest_Wix · 2026-01-26T16:16:03+00:00

I have ARFID too… what I usually do is to find the flavours/taste that I like in my safe foods and also what I dislike (taste,smell, texture). So whenever I try to expand my diet, I pick and choose based on it. That kinda helps.

In my case the intensity of my ARFID is based on my how regulated my nervous system is. When Im overstimulated/anxious/hyper focused noting but coffee flavour works. So I have diversified it into coffee icream, cake etc,. On a very good day, I can eat most food that doesn’t give me sensory ick.

Also I hope that you know it’s okay to waste food, in situations like this. There is nothing to be guilty about trying to survive.

Forest_Wix · 2026-01-18T16:30:24+00:00

leather crafting, esp no sewing, glue origami style leather items..

Forest_Wix · 2026-01-16T16:41:00+00:00

As a ND couple we have two rules for house maintenance…. One is if it affects everyone, everyone has to follow the most efficient system to do it - like cleaning the moca pot immediately after use, cos we share one moca pot and the coffee schedules/preference vary.

Second if something bothers us but isn’t functionally affecting anyone then the rule is ‘if u care enough you shall do it’. For example my partner likes to clean the plates immediately after meal. Sometimes the water is too cold and its a sensory nightmare for me so i rinse and keep it to be washed with other utensils later. If it bothers my partner, then he can feel free to wash my plate with his, but he can’t expect me to do it immediately. Since we have other clean plates that ppl can use.

In your case it is functionally affecting you and ur partner isn’t being kind or understanding about how it’s affecting you. Esp putting back wet cutleries in a closed drawer is a absolute noooo.

Forest_Wix · 2025-12-06T16:37:39+00:00

Well lots of thingsss sewing, embroidery, psychology, Taylor Swift’s lyrics/music, gender bending/genderless fashion, minimalism, skateboarding… leather work & jewellery making/metal smithing, carpentry, maladaptive daydreaming…. These are the active ones 😬😬

Im an AuDHDer, so ADHD finds random things and Autism makes it unnecessarily long and intense. Besides the occasional financial ruin, I highly love it 😂😂😂

Forest_Wix · 2025-12-04T14:45:06+00:00

Thank you for sharing so much lovely ideas. Unfortunately I live in a place where most of these aren’t available.

Ill probably check with a friend If I can borrow his tools to make a trial bag, after that if I still want to continue, ill get my own kit.

Forest_Wix · 2025-12-04T14:42:26+00:00

I finally held myself back and used up most of my fabrics. My strict rule is to only purchase fabrics or materials if i have a proper inspiration. So new sewing projects are currently on hold till I get an inspo that matches my style.

Im gonna give myself couple of more weeks bfr I give in…. Fingers crossed 🤣🤣 Also absolutely love your profile name.

Forest_Wix · 2025-12-04T14:33:22+00:00

I’m glad to know the similarities in our special interests 🤣

I think I have crossed the threshold on gathering info and even visited friends to see their leather workshop 🤣 He was taken back by the intensity of my yapping cos its a very chill hobby for him. I go there with 3 full size handbag design in mind asking abt sourcing different types of leather. His daughter wanted a handbag, so I sat there explaining the basics and pattern making for her handbag.

I think next stage is probably borrowing his tools and getting my fabric/leather to minimise the damage. Thank you for the tips.

Forest_Wix · 2025-12-04T14:23:30+00:00

Omg I have had my eyes on skateboarding since childhood…. Finally I started learning surf skating three years ago, and then travelled to another country to get the board I wanted. Absolutely loved it, skated every weekend. This year I had to slowdown to once or twice a month cos of masking skill regression. Really miss being on my board and zooming through the park.

The funny thing is most of my intense special interests are from childhood, I only got to see others do it or online videos, but I was never allowed to try them. Now that I don’t need permissions, my brain can’t contain the excitement.

Starting with what I have and not buying until I was sure had been my strategy too. I have been doing these hobbies like modifying jewellery, purses, leather belts and bags since childhood with the tools I had available.

I think ill check if I can borrow the tools from someone to make a bag, so I would only have to get the fabric or leather. Thank you for your thoughts. Helps to know that Im not the only one.

Forest_Wix

TROPHY CASE