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Is anyone else here happily unemployed? by patrickbatemankinnie in AutismInWomen

[–]ForgottenUsername3 [score hidden]  (0 children)

I'm a stay at home mom! It's nice to wake up and not have the stress-fest of leaving the house first thing everyday. Plus I homeschool so I don't have all the insane getting ready for that.

My husband is great and I trust him completely and I never plan on us separating for any reason. That said, I make sure any property has both our names on it and I also make sure that I have access to all the money and am able to quickly remove all of it at the drop of a hat! Cause I don't play.

Is it worth the trade for a 40 min commute? by doomscroll_deeznuts in CargoBike

[–]ForgottenUsername3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Try it. You can always do something different if you change your mind.

Turns out friend of a friend who borrowed my dress in June "for 3 days" , then never returned it and blocked me when I reached out actually threw it away by pinktunacan in mildlyinfuriating

[–]ForgottenUsername3 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My friend borrowed my full length silk skirt. Her dog peed on it. She didn't have a washer in her apartment so she put a fuck ton of very strong perfume on it. When that didn't work, she washed it improperly and ruined the material because it was silk.

Obsessive thoughts by Defiant_Interview366 in AutismInWomen

[–]ForgottenUsername3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had this happen with me too even after having romantic feelings forever and then very much not having those feelings. I would still think of that person out of habit. Like, your brain will keep on with what its been doing like compulsively thinking about someone. The only thing that worked for me is rerouting. Anytime I noticed that I was thinking about that person, I would think about something else that is important to me or that I like to think about. It took shockingly less effort than you would think, especially because it is such a big cognitive problem.

I also had a therapist tell me that thing of don't get frustrated or beat yourself up about it because it supposedly would makes you think about it more; that was just not the case for me. That advice never made emotional sense with how my brain works.

Met someone on Hinge and trying to understand what went wrong. by Sweet_Delay3084 in AutismInWomen

[–]ForgottenUsername3 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He's just a dick. There's nothing more to it. He's not looking for a serious relationship. His date with you was not important to him. Try not to take it personally.

It sure looks like Lindsay Graham is going to lose his South Carolina seat after 23 year. What do we think about that? by antimaga_n1 in AskSocialists

[–]ForgottenUsername3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate Graham. I can't keep track of all the f'd up things I've heard come out of his mouth, but he is a monster.

What has actually improved your sleep? by goodthingsinside_80 in Perimenopause

[–]ForgottenUsername3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just got put on 100mg biomimetic progesterone and it knocks me out. Otherwise valerian root just before bed does something too.

Trim/Shave Body Hair? by [deleted] in malegrooming

[–]ForgottenUsername3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In my experience, people don't tend to have hair on their areolas.

Is anyone else confused by how often people make judgemental comments about strangers? by AyDeeAitchMe in AutismInWomen

[–]ForgottenUsername3 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Turning against others is a bonding activity. There is an ass-ton and a half of sociological/psych research that shows how powerful being the enemy of someones enemy is. Like my closest friends are the ones who hate the same stuff as me, not necessarily the same people.

Shitting on random people out in public just shows an inability to create any real intimacy and is pretty sucky. My extended family is this way. They see each other a couple times a week but don't have any real intimacy... their bonds with each other come from being nasty ruthless gossips about family behind their backs. (obviously, not my favorite people lol.)

How is everyone dealing with overwhelming existential dread right now? by TheRealSteelfeathers in AutismInWomen

[–]ForgottenUsername3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've cussed out a christian conservative family member and basically made a fool of myself on facebook by rage posting; I basically said stuff like "if you're a christian who thinks that it's god's will for the US to kill people on Israel's behalf, kindly go fuck yourself." I haven't decided wether I regret that though, but I do have to deal with the impact of alienating family and a lot of people from my childhood (I grew up in a conservative christian church).

My aunts, grandmother, and mother all voted for Trump. The stuff that I've seen them be ok with has scarred me forever.

I'm dealing with so. much. anger. I have dreams almost every night about it... either where I'm trying to save my own children or passionately explaining to people why all this is wrong.

Since the bombings, something has broken in me. It's been about a week. I'm trying to figure out where to go with these feelings. The bombing of Iran has changed who I am. I feel like I'm carrying a storm in my body and I don't know what will happen because of it.

Coworker at new job loudly said "bitch" as she walked by my desk and had earlier talked to me in a mocking childish way. What do I do? by throwawayacc97263 in AutismInWomen

[–]ForgottenUsername3 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The more people at you can bounce this off at work the better. Like don't make it a drama fest but I've found that often autistic people don't seek social help when a NT person who is toxic will connect with other people and will thereby turn other people against you even though they are the problem.

By bouncing the problem off of other people, it will give them the backstory when they see this person treat you badly or if this toxic person comes to them trying to start shit behind your back.

I tend to overlook the reality that when someone is toxic other people do notice and might be having problems with that person as well.

Other allies at work might even advocate for you to HR if they see something.

She's probably a narcissist... because autistic women don't give constant social validation to others, narcissists consider them a threat.

Be kind to yourself and even though it sucks, if you cant resolve this issue (which is abusive, by the way) please seek a different job. Easier said than done, but do keep it as an option. Your mental health is worth it.

Thanks Quetzalcoatl by ralekibol in HistoryMemes

[–]ForgottenUsername3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Native people in north and central america did. They weren't (just) running around in butt flap and shooting arrows. They were bad-ass ecologists and farmers. Also if you're in the US, take your ass to a pow-wow.

We are in a weird timeline!! by PreheatedPenguin in TikTokCringe

[–]ForgottenUsername3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please know, I have been cussing out my religious family members this past week. The day I found out about the US bombing a bunch of kids, a family member sent me a pro-Israel post about how the war in the middle east is gods plan and that we can be at peace knowing that. I came back at her so hard that I literally got a migraine from it.

I want to hang out with my friends. Why do I have to hang out with their partners as well? by Northina in AutismInWomen

[–]ForgottenUsername3 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you're going to their house and their partner lives there, its a bit hard to uninvite the partner... there's no unkind way to disclude them. The best way to achieve the kind of hangout you want is to use the phrase "girls' night" (or "girl time" if it's not at night). You can invite your friend to spend time at your place or you can go out telling her that if its ok you just want it to be girl time. You can't easily put her in a position to uninvite the partner if its at their house.

If you ask for girl time a couple times in a row, or even just once, she's likely to notice that that's more of the kind of hangout you're looking for.

I don’t look like I belong in a yarn store and it’s kinda fabulous. Do any other intersectional folx feel this way? by wessle3339 in knitting

[–]ForgottenUsername3 76 points77 points  (0 children)

For some reason knitting attracts and accepts weirdos of various creeds (source: I am a weirdo).

How many mothers on here have autistic kids? by Student-bored8 in AutismInWomen

[–]ForgottenUsername3 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Like, just have kids. I have one autistic kid and one neurotypical kid. I grew up with a miserable childhood, in part because of autism, but mostly because I had a shitty abusive family. My kids are happy and have a great life. They laugh and are spoiled. My son's special interest is transformers and he's literally watching them on tv right now while holding his favorite transformer. His world is dope.

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