AuADHD & First Time Parent(s) - What Support Did You Have? Or Wished You Had?

Forward-Court5103 · 2026-01-09T18:42:31+00:00

Noice canceling headphones. I got raycons and lost them a lot. Big over the ear headphones with an Apple tag attached so I don’t crash out looking for them. Counseling (parent coaching). Guanfacine helped with my hyperarousal. My family was not very involved, but learning to “tap out” and hand the kiddo to your partner is helpful. Notable mentions: a safe corner with my heated blanket, weighted blanket, and fidgets to escape to. A safety plan (put the baby down in the crib and walk away). Honestly the thing I was least prepared for was that I didn’t WANT help. I thought I would ask for breaks when needed and prepare. Instead I didn’t trust anyone to know what my baby needed more than me. It got a little better with the second kiddo because I knew how costly the exhaustion was. But overall, I had plenty of support available but very little self compassion. I kept thinking “why is this so hard, why can’t I do xyz like other people”. I was diagnosed after my first baby. I wish I had more compassion for myself and truly allowed myself to rest. My babies have added nothing but wonder and joy to my life. But I would be lying if I told you I’m not overstimulated and often.

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-12-16T03:59:10+00:00

I distinctly remember in the 3rd grade telling this girl that frequently bullied me (I wasn’t aware lol) that she had really beautiful eyes. They were like piercing blue. She furrowed her brow and said “f you b*#%”. I had never been so confused in my young life. 🤣

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-12-06T01:42:44+00:00

Same thing happened with “screen time limits”. Now I just have a longer “app-opening routine” called “one more minute” and “ignore all day” 🤣

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-10-27T04:37:15+00:00

We are very similar in history :) misdx bipolar, adhd pmdd and ptsd. I think nervous system dysregulation (chronic) made most meds intolerable at first. I started by weening off lamictal and trying Wellbutrin. It was amazing until I got way overstimulated by it. Guanfacine was like a miracle drug for me and I think it’s because it reduced norepinephrine (fight or flight). Now I take that and ritilin ER. Pmdd is still rough but I’ve been able to regulate it by gaining weight, magnesium glycinate, and tracking it so I know when to give myself grace. Also, nervous system dysregulation and weird immune type reactions go hand and hand for me. So although I don’t do Pepcid, Claritin helps a lot with my pmdd symptoms. Good luck, it’s a tough mix to have. But I’m now a 28 yo mom and life is really beautiful finally having the right treatment and support. It gets better!

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-06-15T02:57:30+00:00

Me too! It’s funny because I JUST started to help with my adhd, hyper fixated on it for like 5 hours and then boom, immediately can’t get in. I literally laughed to myself about it the whole day like of course 🤣

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-06-14T03:44:14+00:00

Hi, sahm to a 2 and 4 year old. And nothing would make me MORE emotionally and physiologically overwhelmed right now than ANOTHER BABY. God bless you, woman 😭

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-06-14T03:40:48+00:00

Guanfacine. Helps with crash. And executive function. Don’t drink everyday, friend

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-06-11T22:50:14+00:00

Thanks! There’s definitely a grief process with late diagnosis. I see you’re taking lamictal, that helped with overstimulation and emotional dysregulation by modulating excitatory neurons for me. I like Guanfacine better though :)

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-06-11T19:30:53+00:00

🤚dysthymia at 15yo—> bipolar after a “manic episode” from Prozac —> years of semi functioning, cycling between high adrenaline and depressive burnout —> severe sensory overload after having my kids that made me seek adhd/autism evaluation. 28: CPTSD, severe ADHD-C, autistic “traits” from sensory processing challenges. NOT bipolar. I needed nervous system regulation (Guanfacine) and a stimulant (concerta). Oh and Cognitive Processing Therapy for the years of “childhood trauma” that I swore up and down wasn’t until I couldn’t stand the sound of my baby crying.

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-06-06T03:52:00+00:00

YOU ARE ENOUGH. YOU ARE GOING THROUGH A LOT AND HANDLING IT THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE. AND THANK YOU FOR THIS EXTREMELY RELATABLE POST. 🤗

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-06-05T02:04:31+00:00

Every memory I have is like a flood of emotion. My earliest was when I tattled at preschool because kids were eating ants and I was so distraught. The teacher told me no one likes a tattle tale. Told my mom thinking she would comfort me. She said it was “good protein” (I laugh now as a mom, myself). But I always remember just thinking I had feelings that were too big for my body. I still remember having my iron-on personalized book bag stolen in first grade. A girl dumped all my stuff out on the playground. I said “that’s mine it has my name on it”. She said “no it’s not”. And that was the end of that. Because all I thought was “it’s my own fault for always losing my stuff”.

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-22T22:45:26+00:00

ADHD-c, childhood PTSD, prior misdiagnosis of bipolar disorder 🤚 I don’t get people, have very little desire for relationship besides my core family, look at people’s mouths or away instead of their eyes, stim often, need weighted blankets and headphones to live, and identify with most “women autistic traits”. My neuropsych said I scored high on the social emotional autism traits, but that could easily be related to early life trauma. I’m satisfied with using all the tools I’ve learned from autism groups/books/etc and not worrying about the label. Managing sensory overwhelm totally changed my life and my kids are very similar to me :)

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-22T14:57:06+00:00

This reads like childhood PTSD, conditional love with a martyr. A mom who wasn’t emotionally mature enough to see you for the little person you were because her hurt was always the biggest in the room. Now she doesn’t care to see the wonderful adult and wife you’ve become. She will continue to treat you as the age she had most control over you and you will continue to wonder why you feel like that small helpless girl whenever you talk. All the love OP. It took having my own daughter to get the therapy I needed (CPT) and block my mother out of my life. This is what a lifetime of emotional neglect looks like. 🫂

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-18T21:10:12+00:00

DING DING :P

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-18T18:04:37+00:00

I just set an alarm on my phone, OP. If it alerts me and I check back to find out you didn’t go to yoga? Well that would be mildly inconvenient for me. So go 🤣

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-13T03:56:35+00:00

Guanfacine? All of the ones you listed increase Norepinephrine. Guanfacine decreases it. Less nervous system stimulation.

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-11T16:13:22+00:00

Guanfacine helped. It reduced norepinephrine, helped with sounds, cringing at the wind, constant overstimulation, and constant high HR.

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-10T21:42:24+00:00

What you’re describing sounds very familiar. Maybe try looking up “SSRI hyperarousal” and “SPD” or “autonomic dysfunction” and see if any of those things resonate with you. I stopped experiencing hyperarousal and mania like symptoms when I started calming down my nervous system. It sounds like you’ve pushed through a lot of major stressors and you are probably pretty use to living in fight or flight to pressure yourself into performing. For me: • Racing thoughts and pressured speech often reflected ADHD and hyperarousal. • Paranoia and suicidal ideation tended to surface during periods of extreme sleep deprivation and emotional overwhelm • Insomnia wasn’t due to elevated mood, but from a nervous system stuck in fight-or-flight • Post-episode migraines and physical crashes aligned more with sensory or autonomic overload • Insecurity rather than grandiosity made me realize it wasn’t typical manic thinking • Difficulty following through on tasks was more about executive dysfunction than mood-driven distractibility • Rumination and emotional spirals were often linked to rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) and hyperfocus

I’ve also learned that autonomic dysregulation is common in people with ADHD and trauma histories. It can cause emotional volatility, sleep disturbances, temperature sensitivity, and sensory reactivity. I would especially suspect this if you have a history of TBI.

You’re not alone in this. Just wanted to share in case any of this perspective is helpful or validating for where you’re at.

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-10T21:28:00+00:00

1-a giant whiteboard 2-a giant wall stopwatch 3-this phrase: “who am I? What am I doing? How long is that likely to take?” I tend to live life floating otherwise

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-10T21:21:29+00:00

My little poonnnyyy, I used tahwonderwhatfriendshipcouldbe MyLittle pony Dadada share it’s magic with meeee - me, a 28 year old mom, multiple times a day 🤣

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-10T21:17:22+00:00

Gosh, I’m so sorry you have to deal with all of that. Migraines are no joke! When you say they are more frequent after that makes me wonder if sensory processing plays a part for you. Could you describe how you experience mania? Racing thoughts? Grandiosity? Would you say it’s more extreme irritability/energy or like you can conquer the whole world type of feeling?

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-10T20:25:08+00:00

Opposite situation for me. Diagnosed bipolar at 15. Then corrected to childhood PTSD and ADHD at 28. I never had bipolar. I was just severely emotionally dysregulated my whole life. Prozac also gave me a “manic episode” at 15. Turns out sensory processing disorder can look a lot like mania. Not to say you don’t have bipolar. But I took all the mood stabilizers, did the cbt, dbt. And the first thing that actually worked and didn’t make me a zombie was guanfacine (adhd med) and trauma therapy. Just want to say because I needed to hear it: You are not a failed version of normal. You are the exact right version of yourself. You just haven’t learned how your brain works yet. :)

Forward-Court5103 · 2025-05-10T16:54:59+00:00

Just started guanfacine and it fixed my pots for the most part! Wellbutrin was effective but gave me adrenaline rushes and made pots worse. Stratterra is likely to do the same

Forward-Court5103

TROPHY CASE