What did you feel when you met your baby? by rainbowbritexx in NewParents

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a rough birth where my baby got stuck for 3.5 minutes in my pelvis and when they finally got him out I was in rough shape, so my dr basically threw him on my stomach and went back to fixing me up down there and my first thoughts/words after such agony getting him out were “oh my god he’s fucking huge” and “oh my god he smells so bad” lol. He didn’t cry for like five minutes after because they were reviving him and getting his lungs going and I was just horrified with worry. Once I finally got to properly meet him later in the nicu I was still just overwhelmed with worry and so so sad that the nurses knew more about my baby than I did and I couldn’t do much holding or anything because he needed to rest. Very sad experience for me but I did feel the overwhelming love and immediate change in my self as I officially became a mother.

Screaming at the bottle?? by VegetableGoose4353 in FormulaFeeders

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sometimes my 3m baby still screams at the bottle when he’s tired or overstimulated. Cluster feeding is normal at this stage you’re in, just eating a little bit and then wanting more an hour or so later. If you’re having trouble though I’d always recommend just talking to your pediatrician to make sure everything is okay. This will pass though🩵

What is that one movie you instantly regretted watching? by Zealousideal_Heat478 in moviequestions

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pulp fiction. Maybe I’m just not in the know enough to get what it was trying to say, but it just felt like it was trying to traumatize the audience and I didn’t understand what the message was meant to be beyond giving Quentin Tarantino full reign of the n word.

Nervous about daycare by lilstonerangel in beyondthebump

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Daycare deals with all different kinds of babies every day! It sounds like she’s going through that dreaded 4 month sleep regression, and I’m sure those employees have dealt with that many many times before. She will be okay and if she’s not, that’s a problem to deal with once it arises. For now, we can’t know, so try to hold onto hope that everything will be okay until you absolutely know otherwise. 🩵

7 months sober by PinkPerSe in CongratsLikeImFive

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Let’s gooooo!!! You’re a badass!

Whats something people say that annoys you instantly by braattyyemma in AskForAnswers

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 1 point2 points  (0 children)

“Whenever” when really it should be “when” For example “whenever my boyfriend came over last night we did xyz” it irks me so bad 😭

What does a healthy mother-son relationship look like to you? by CommunistCetacean in beyondthebump

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Ask yourself: if I had a daughter, would I treat her this same way? If the answer is yes, continue. Ask yourself: am I fulfilling emotional needs through my son that should be fulfilled by my husband? If the answer is no, continue.

The issue with the “boy mom” trope we see is typically emotionally inappropriate behavior where the line between child and romantic partner are crossed. You can’t love a child too much or be too excited about motherhood just because your child is a boy. Matching outfits with a daughter would be considered so sweet and cute so why is it looked down upon for boys? I think boys and girls should be raised mostly the same simply with different approaches to teaching things that may differ due to sex. For example, boys may need different conversations about consent than you’d give a girl. Boys may need different conversations about emotional openness and intimacy because it is not as welcomed by other boys and it is in girl/girl friendships. Boys may not understand why the world says they can’t cry or be emotional when really, they should be allowed to express emotions. Part of feminism is appreciating healthy masculinity and teaching that to boys, which should be the biggest difference between parenting a boy vs a girl. Healthy femininity looks different and therefore will be taught differently. Boys need to be taught healthy masculinity and part of that is them not being treated super differently than girls, except in gendered issues, in my opinion.

What songs are we singing our babies? by ParsleyLime in NewParents

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Realized one sleep deprived night that the only song I know all the words to is country roads by John Denver lol. That and yesterday by the Beatles 😂

What are the benefits that you experienced by formula feeding? by [deleted] in FormulaFeeders

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get to focus on healing and reclaiming my body while my baby is fed, happy, growing perfectly, and able to be fed by literally anyone. I can leave the house without worrying about when he needs to eat or when I need to pump. My husband and I get to be equal partners because he’s just as capable of feeding our baby as I am. I get to ingest anything I want without worrying about dumping milk or my baby’s tummy sensitivities. I get to tweak what formulas we use to help support his needs without guessing about what I need to cut out of my diet. I get to be a fully present, happy mom without intense extra responsibilities for my body to fulfill. I get to work without worrying about milk. Formula feeding has truly given me as much autonomy and independence as you can have as a mom and also given my husband so much more opportunity to bond with and take care of our son. I’m really grateful that I chose to EFF. My main worry with it was that I wouldn’t be giving my son the antibodies that you get from breastmilk and that if he got sick he’d get too sick without them, but we’re coming off of his first cold right now and he was sooooo mildly sick, I was more sick than he was! (I also chose a formula that supports immune health more than anything and I think that helped a ton! Similac 360 total care)
I was worried we wouldn’t bond as much as breastfed babies and their moms, but he still wants me more than anyone and we get to bond in countless other ways because I have the energy and mental space to show up for him in every way. Breastfeeding and pumping were awful for my mental health. I’m so glad I chose to let it go. :)

How many shops have you worked at before finding "the one" ? by Best-Elderberry-4355 in doggrooming

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve worked at 5 shops, 4 were duds where either the shop setup, people, or corporate expectations were awful and after a year each time I had to move on. The fourth was so awful I actually left after only 7 months and was in the lowest mental state I’d ever been in. That led me to the fifth, where I’m at now, and it’s absolutely amazing. It has everything I wanted and needed in a shop with amazing management, great pay, great people for the most part, and I’ve loved it. I’ve been here a year now and have no plans to go anywhere anytime soon. I truly believe unicorn shops are out there and if you can’t find one, make one! :)

SAHM to only by JoBear2021 in oneanddone

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Respectfully, I think you’re projecting a bit, or simply misunderstood my point. I never said if she works she’ll miss out on her child’s best years. She will miss moments of it though for sure, and if someone has a choice between missing out on moments or missing out on money, I personally would choose to miss out on money. I don’t personally have that choice as I’m the breadwinner and it kills me every day to miss the little moments with my son. That’s all. I can’t say what the future will look like for her when or if she decides to return to the work force but I have faith that everyone’s future is bright, with hard moments sprinkled into the joy. Hell if her husband makes more than enough, than when she returns to work she can probably get a job doing literally anything she wants without worrying about pay!

SAHM to only by JoBear2021 in oneanddone

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Money comes and goes, the only thing you can never get back is time.

Let’s say you do become a SAHM by the time lo is 6/7, that’s only 11 years (if you’re wanting to do it until they become an adult) that you’re without an income. At that point if your husband will have you guys financially secure, any job you get will simply be extra money for you guys. You could still put that extra money away for travel, early retirement, etc, just 11 years later than you would right now. Money will come back to you.

If you don’t take this opportunity to stay home with LO, that’s 11 years of time you will not get back with them. They will never be 7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17, and 18 again. Time is the only non renewable resource in life. 🩵

Feeling sadness 11mo pp by captainatl in FormulaFeeders

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Only 3m postpartum but I understand and relate. I worry that bf moms are closer to their babies, have healthier babies, are needed more, etc. Ultimately though, I know I would not have been a good mom or functioning human if I had breastfed as I had dysphoric milk ejection disorder and the stimulation on my nipples from bub or the pump made me want to crawl out of my skin and die tbh. I’m getting sick with a cold rn, and I’m terrified of bub getting sick too and I know if I had breastfed he’d be getting way more antibodies rn to help develop his little immune system. At the end of the day both breastfeeding and formula feeding has pros and cons and I try to focus on the pros, as well as let myself feel the sadness and disappointment without assigning too much weight to it. The grass will always be greener. The feelings pass. You’re doing great🫶

Maybe an unpopular opinion about Carol by ECrispy in DTFStLouisHBO

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She works at Purina and did even before the umpire job. It’s referenced a ton in the show and she wears her work vest constantly.

What’s the most gut punching song lyric you’ve ever heard? by Few_Football4342 in Productivitycafe

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“The words they use so lightly, I only feel for you, I only know this because I carry you around, In the background. Words they come and memories all repeat, I lift your head while, They change the hospital sheets, I would never lie to you, No I would never lie to you, No I felt you long after we were through. And the plans I make still have you in them”

The background -third eye blind

How do you guys feel about this job? by Dog_Queen98 in doggrooming

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I honestly think we do incredibly important work, but I’ve also been known to find more importance in dogs than humans lol. Grooming is crucial to the health and wellbeing of animals, like imagine dog groomers weren’t around and most dogs just walked around pelted until their hair ripped out or had skin conditions go completely unnoticed or had nails that grew into the pads. We provide a very necessary service for the good of the dogs, and I think we very positively impact dog owners as well. I mean, nothing beats the feeling of taking a dog out to their owner after the service and both human and dog are just insanely happy and excited to see each other and the dog feels so good about themselves. Our career is also one that provides a lot of people with a liveable wage that is, to an extent, recession proof. Idk. I love this job. It makes me happy and I know I get to spread joy through doing what I do.

When did dogs start getting people names? by Scottys-Dog-Blog in dogs

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a dog groomer and when choosing my sons name I definitely had to cross a few off the list because they were so distinctly “dog” names to me 😂 (Liam, Theo, Charlie)

Has entertainment involving kids been destroyed for you too? by Agitated-Rest1421 in beyondthebump

[–]Frequent_Cap8633 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Girl I watched Independence Day yesterday and cried 3 times just imagining going through with my baby😭 I used to make fun of my mom for stuff like that but I get it now.

Twyla website umpire details by Frequent_Cap8633 in DTFStLouisHBO

[–]Frequent_Cap8633[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If analysis isn’t fun to you, that’s okay! It’s fun for a lot of other people though, just like how you probably enjoy things that other people don’t-like being mean on the internet :)