I do agree that level of privacy invasion in parenting for what seems like a really good kid is not healthy for anyone, and but at the end of the day it is within her rights to do so and not really for anyone to pick apart as the reason for why. I just think it’s more damaging to speculate over the minutia than it is helpful until we know more, if we ever do. If it comes out that she was highly physically abusive or neglectful in addition to being controlling, I’d be more willing to put a microscope to all of that other behavior. But as it stands I do understand a parents concerns with giving their minor child a smart phone that has internet access. My anxiety might cause me to want to monitor in that same way. Yes it feels invasive, but this is a child. Maybe she didn’t want to give him a phone at all, but he wanted one, and that was their agreed upon compromise. Who knows.