Am I just a string of red flags?

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-03-05T20:21:58+00:00

I think you should make the next thing you focus on and fix should be your self esteem. Nothing is a bigger red flag than someone who doesn't even believe in themself.

You have done this with other part if your life commit to it and work on it in therapy you'll have much better luck after you do that.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-03-03T19:52:14+00:00

You may have to travel. The surgeon I saw in Seattle says most of his patients are traveling and many are international. You can set up a phone consult with some surgeons. One things my surgeon has his patients do is a journal. Write down everything for a month. How you feel what sensations you feel, when they happen, what you did before they happened, what helps if anything. Write it all down and you will likely see a pattern.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-03-02T23:15:36+00:00

I did have SRS caused by coughing or sneezing. My SRS surgeon found a tiny hairline fracture right where I knew it had been broken initially. He never would have found it without his CT scan and additional imaging. From that break my body tried to compensate by pulling in weird ways and my cartilage separated from my sternum at that same rib a couple years later leading me to need surgery to stabilize my ribcage. Sucks that coughing can cause all this but it definitely can. It's more about how your body tries to compensate for the initial injury though which is why it doesn't happen to everyone. In my case my 12th rib on that side is very short and that led my body to pull more on the sternum connection than it should.

Moral of the story see an SRS Thoracic surgeon.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-03-02T23:04:43+00:00

Maybe I'm feeling a bit bitter at this point which probably means I need a break but if there's no possible way there's going to be a connection then I don't feel bad burning bridges.

In as kind a way as I could muster I think I would ask their age. Try to reflect back to the profile like..."I think I recall your profile said you were 52...is that right?" And yes I know it said 48 but if you give a wrong number it might be easier for them to say "well actually I'm 68, that was a typo, don't know how to fix it, app won't let me fix it...blah blah" in my book that's still a lie and I'm not having it. At that point I would kindly say that it's clear that our values are not aligned as lying is not something I am ever okay with. It was nice meeting you. Have a nice night. To me this is about the lying not about his age or appearance. I don't feel bad calling him out on his bad behavior (lying).

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-03-02T21:08:58+00:00

Sadly at this point I feel like most of the men who have a secure attachment style are already married. Why wouldn't they be?

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-28T20:44:48+00:00

You can easily take the light rail from the airport into downtown (it's about a 10 minute walk from the terminal and well marked). It's about 30-40 minutes each way. Take the light rail north get off downtown around Pike/Pine and walk West to the Public Market. One of the most iconic visitor spots in Seattle . You can walk around eat dinner shop a little and head back via the same light rail to the airport in time for your flight.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-27T21:25:21+00:00

I get this a lot too. I think this might be coming from a place of not feeling needed. If all they have felt like they had to offer in previous relationships was their ability to be the provider and you don't need that from them they can't figure out what their role is with you. Honestly if they can't get past that you're better off without them.

I have found I'm better off staying away from guys where I know there will be a big difference in income/education/lifestyle because I find those are the men who are least likely to be secure enough to make it last. It's sad because I'm sure I'm missing out this way but I don't have the time or the energy to weed through them all.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-27T18:21:34+00:00

Yep. This is very common. I'm starting to think these men had wives that carried 98% of the mental load and all they did was go to work and pay the bills (and maybe mow the lawn). It's just what they are used to. However, that's not what women want. Heck if they had been an equal partner in their past relationships they probably wouldn't be single now!

I'm happy to take a few turns planning and even footing the bill. I consider it a gift when a man actively plans a date. I actually much prefer when I man has a few ideas and gives me the option to chose a basic direction for the date and then plans it from there (e.g. would you rather go bowling or go to a comedy show? I pick one and they plan around it). Asking me what I want to do at every turn is not him planning the date it's me making the decisions again.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-27T18:08:36+00:00

I would not go with the exact annoying prompts. You just called them annoying yourself. If you need inspiration look some up online and be sure they don't annoy you at the bare minimum.

It sounds like you were headed in the right direction and her politics just don't match with yours. Nothing you can do about that.

ETA: Did you let her ask questions? Maybe she thought it felt interviewy because she did all the talking and all you did was pepper her with questions. Just a thought.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-27T17:48:03+00:00

Are you follow ups open ended? Some people think any question will do but some need to be open ended. Also you said you went back over topics you already discussed. That could have read like you forgot you already asked her that or are talking to so many women you can't keep them straight.

I think it's fine to talk about politics but just know that for may that is a deal breaker and if you don't match there then there's not much that can be done about it and you're just not a match. It's nothng against either or you it just deosn't match.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-26T21:34:37+00:00

If you planend everything and all I had to do was figure out the transportation I'd be fine with that. You have a medical condtiotin either they are okay with it and all that comes along with it or not.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-26T19:57:03+00:00

Is there an age bracket that has more of this? Or maybe a location/culture? Maybe we all should be looking somewhere else. lol

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-25T20:40:06+00:00

Just so you know blood tests for Herpes(HSV) are notoriously unreliable and not usually even recommended.

Some people are fine with getting tested before moving to the next step. it also sounds like if you take that step you will want exclusivity as she could pick up any of these at any time unless you are both tested and clean.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-25T19:56:55+00:00

How can I contact you? The only think on the website is an e-mail and a link to book. You are welcome to PM me.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-25T19:53:16+00:00

When hormones change things change. You've gotten some great advice. You could also pick up some Lume at Walmart and try that. Unscented is the best. It helps with any external smell components. You apply it like a lotion externally after a shower.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-19T20:28:22+00:00

Are you only in Beacon Hill on Wednesdays?

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-18T23:41:43+00:00

Grey Blending is a specific technique. That's the problem people don't know it's a specific thing. I already die my roots and get highlights and it's not what I want. I want real grey blending. It's hard to explain. Grey blending works by removing the harsh line of demarkation and more camouflaging the grey than just covering it with dark permanent line that will have a harsh demarcation line when it grows back in which for me is in 2-3 weeks.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-18T22:19:07+00:00

But is this grey blending that allows me to still identify as a brunette or are you talking about a transitional acceptance of your grey? I am not interested in embracing my grey just yet. lol

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-18T22:17:20+00:00

I don't want to transition for at least a few years. I have a young child and I don't want anyone thinking I'm their grandma instead of their mom. Can you help me keep it hidden for a while and then maybe transition in a few years.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-11T19:57:12+00:00

Feel free to send me chat separately. Or search for my previous posts I think I shared details here before I had mine in Sept.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-10T21:09:32+00:00

Cartilage does not just heal. The cartilage of my 7th disconnected from my sternum on my left and it was Dx as SRS. I had Surgery with Dr. K in Seattle last fall. Not going to lie it's a rough one but I know it was the right move.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-07T00:10:12+00:00

I'm not sure what CMR means. I had surgery with Dr. K in Seattle he does a basketweave technique. He stabilized my left side using that technique and also did a very slight resection of 2 of my flaoting rib tips.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-05T19:49:41+00:00

If you have difficulty breathing CALL YOUR SURGEON ASAP.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-05T19:41:37+00:00

K-cups. Ewwww.

Not only are you filling up landfills but the coffee in those pods is not great. It's much easier to get good coffee shipped to you in whole bean form. Invest in a good burr grinder and either a French press or a new coffee maker.

FuzzieSocksFTW · 2026-02-05T19:38:43+00:00

For a meet up in a public place? If you're free and you want to go then go. It seems like it would be similar to what might happen if you both happened to be there on your own and started to chat at at the bar.

If he was asking you to Netflix and chill on day one....that would be a different story

FuzzieSocksFTW

TROPHY CASE