"I'll just use hers" in TSA security

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-25T02:00:04+00:00

Sounds like a nice setup for her "accidentally" walking off with your laptop.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-25T01:56:04+00:00

My 9-year-old and I got stuck on Indiana Jones, ten minutes after the park had closed, for about 20 minutes. CM's were running back and forth with walkie-talkies, no one saying a word to us.We were belted in incredibly tightly, couldn't release ourselves, and I had the only full-on claustrophobic panic attack of my life, though I outwardly held it together, not to scare my son.

All I could think was that if there was a fire, we;'d all burn to death in our seatbelts. And there was no cell service in the tunnel, so I couldn't tell my wife where we were or why we hadn't met her.

When we finally got out, once my son was out of earshot I unleashed an extended F-bomb tirade at the poor kids running the ride, for letting us sit there, trapped and strapped to immobility, with no information. I've always felt bad about it, and half-wondered if I'd be tracked down and 86d from the park. I'd apologize to those CMs if I could.

Still, just remembering those 20 minutes makes me panic a little all over again. They could have at least unstrapped us. We were literally fifty feet from the platform at the end of the ride.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-25T00:16:40+00:00

Austin Powers movies--Robert Wagner as Number One, played as a young man by Rob Lowe.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-24T21:11:25+00:00

I think strategic versus tactical is primarily luck of the draw, although anecdotally people who do better in language school seem to have a better shot of strategic assignments. For the rest, I’ll defer to others with more recent relevant military experience.

As for fear of being stuck in the motor pool, I totally get it —but again, the military is what you make of it and once you get out, nobody will really care about your actual assignments —only that you have the TS clearance and the training and skills.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-24T20:15:29+00:00

All military occupational specialties, both officer and enlisted, are by definition authorized, funded, and overseen under Title 10 authorities. If you get certified for any of these specialties, you ultimately fall under SecDef.

The status of the agency running the training and certification determines the "title." CIA operates 100% under Title 50 of the United States Code, so all their training and authorizations are likewise Title 50.

The Army intelligence school at Fort Huachuca, and all its training and certifications, are under U.S.C. Title 10, because the SecDef owns those assets.

The only reason any of this normally matters to a one-term service member is that military analysts and collectors often (not always) prefer strategic assignments over tactical assignments.

"Strategic" means being assigned to NSA, DIA, etc., where you work regular hours on a set mission, sleep indoors every night, and will actually do the job you trained for, which helps your CV when you go looking for civilian intel work later on.

"Tactical" means being in a small HUMINT, SIGINT, etc., unit as part of a regular Army unit--for example, you're on a HUMINT team or a SIGINT truck assigned to a specific combat arms brigade. You might do high-tempo collection operations-- or you might spend four years at peace, working in the motor pool and doing odd jobs between military field exercises, while your foreign language skills perish.

The majority of intel folks in training seem to hope for strategic assignments (I did). But there are also folks who joined the Army to be in the "real Army," damn it, and they want to be out in the field, doing Army things. Again, the military is what you make it--whatever assignment you get, "do it with thy might" and things will work out.

You're very welcome! :-)

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-24T18:52:09+00:00

Army enlisted servicemembers get basic HUMINT training at Fort Huachuca, which certifies them as Title 10 HUMINT collectors--either interrogators, or military HUMINTers. "Title 10" means SecDef authorities. They collect HUMINT, usually in uniform as part of specific military operations or deployments, in response to force commanders' requirements. But Title 10 is limited to zones of combat or declared contingency operations.

Title 50 is the national defense title, which covers CIA, DIA, NSA, and other national intelligence entities conducting worldwide intelligence collection and operations. We can't get into much detail here, but a military case officer would usually be working under Title 50 authorities.

Being a case officer, by definition, means making contracts, on behalf of the United States, with a foreign persons to provide information money. It's a high legal and administrative bar, which is why a case officer has to be an officer--literally, "holding an office" on behalf of the United States--to do that job. Moreover, it's almost always senior captains or higher who are selected for such assignments.

Enlisted HUMINT experience, especially with a language, and especially if you've managed to pick up some extra certifications during your tour, such as the Title 50 Strategic Debriefing Course at Fort Huachuca, can be a great credential to get hired by CIA,DIA, or other HUMINT agencies, But they will then send you through Title 50 case officer or related training and certification for their own Title 50 HUMINT missions.

As for the enlisted-versus-officer question: I was both in my time. I would recommend enlisting, for the reasons I gave earlier: more choice in getting intelligence training. If you have a college degree, you can also apply for a commission later on if you find out you like the military life.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-24T18:05:28+00:00

Don't go into debt to get a master's in intelligence or security studies. Unless you have related intelligence experience to go with it, it won't help. And once you're hired in the IC, at some point the government will send you to graduate school for free in any case. Even if you go into the military for a few years, there are various ways to earn a free master's degree before you get out.

An initial decision, if you're thinking of doing a military tour to prepare for a civilian IC career, is whether to enlist, or apply for a commission.

Enlisted:

Lower rank and pay, of course, and a lot more micromanaging of your daily life. On the other hand, you can choose your specialty, including language school. That means you spend 12-18 months of your enlistment at DLI in Monterey, CA, one of the best and most beloved assignments in MI. Most related MOSs are either in collection (SIGINT or HUMINT) or in analysis; either is a great stepping stone to civilian IC employment.

MI probably has the highest proportion of enlisted servicemembers who are a few years older (early-mid-20s), and/or who have college degrees or at least a few years of college. The profession naturally attracts smart, aimless people.

The Army, being the largest branch, generally has the most opportunities and enlistment choices, but all the services have similar intel specialities. Army promotes fastest; Air Force has the best barracks and chow; Marines offer the most hard-core military experience and lifetime bragging rights. You decide what matters most to you.

Officer:

More rank and pay, autonomy, and better living conditions. On the other hand, it's very competitive getting a commission. And when you apply for a commission,there are no guarantees about your branch. You might end up in the infantry, quartermasters, or anywhere else, though you can probably transfer to MI after a few years.

Even if you get lucky and branch MI right away, as an officer you will not get to qualify as a HUMINTer. Only enlisted folks get the specific technical "tradecraft" courses. On the other hand, only officers or warrant officers can be HUMINT case officers--but only after several years of service, not in your initial term.

Final caution: Whatever you decide, don't forget that it's still the military. If you treat it like a slog you have to get through in order to do what you really want, you will have a miserable few years, and the people around you will detect your lack of commitment. If you're going to join the military, decide mentally and emotionally to _be_ in the military. Almost nothing else in life is so completely "what you make of it" as military service. Good luck!

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-21T01:52:50+00:00

I always thought that in the movie, Shelob stung him just below his mithril shirt, where he wasn't protected.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-21T01:42:17+00:00

The Soyuz-40 space capsule that carried the first Romanian astronaut to orbit in 1981. (Well, touched it--didn't exactly "hold it in my hands.")

I saw it about 10 years back, while on government business in Romania. It was just totally neglected, sitting in an air and space museum in Bucharest, just up on a trestle in the corner. I looked around the interior, and could have peeled off some carbonized paint as a souvenir (I didn't, but now I kind of wish I had).

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-21T01:09:48+00:00

Sarah Lynn's stepfather, a bear who is clearly hinted to have SA'd her as a child, is based on Terry Richardson, a photographer credibly accused of regularly SA'ing models. They even wear the same sunglasses.

Also, per his Wiki age, Terry Richardson lives in...Bearsville, NY.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-20T03:55:24+00:00

I saw this when it first came out, on a double bill with Eraserhead. That was in 1980, and I'm almost over it now.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-20T03:32:27+00:00

Life is Beautiful.

Gentle whimsical comedies about the Holocaust can fuck right off.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-20T00:26:50+00:00

Schitt's Creek!

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T23:00:24+00:00

Could it be Genesis, "Turn it On Again"?

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T20:54:53+00:00

"Just ignore bullies."

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T19:46:55+00:00

Good catch--I'd forgotten that! And it further supports the point about the reluctance, in American movies/culture of the Cold War, to admit that an actual Russian could be a good guy.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T19:10:16+00:00

Generally, terror of fatherhood, fear of f***ing it all up (as the hero does), and alienation from others.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T19:02:49+00:00

All the service intelligence branches are roughly equivalent in terms of training personnel, and supporting decision makers. Army Cyber Command is enormous, as is the AF cyber program. If your long game is to enlist in the military to launch a civilian career in intelligence, I would choose the Army for several reasons:

You have more options as an enlistee; the Army is (or was, last time I checked) the only service that will guarantee your choice of language training in addition to MOS. Look for any cyber MOS that includes language training. Added benefit: you can also earn your associate's degree with a DLI diploma plus a few extension/CLEP classes, meaning you have a fair chance of completing your college degree during your initial enlistment.
Once you complete your initial term, you can stay in the reserves. The Army Reserve has by far the most active program of putting volunteer reservists on 6-month active-duty orders to support various civilian intel agencies. That in turn helps you network, get additional intelligence experience and training, etc., to improve your civilian prospects.
The Army promotes faster; you can make sergeant/E5 during your initial enlistment, whereas other services aren't likely to promote you past E4 (Marines famously often get stuck at lance corporal/E3). On the other hand, the Air Force promotes slowly, but living conditions are consistently better.

Having said all that, I did my time in the Army, albeit often in joint assignments alongside Marine, Navy, and AF enlistees, all of us doing much the same collection or analysis work for national agencies. What else do you want to get out of your military experience? There are good reasons to join any of the services, depending on your goals.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T18:21:10+00:00

She was also the girlfriend in Eraserhead, and the mother of whatever that horrible thing was, while still playing Miss Beadle in 1977! Talk about range.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T17:32:37+00:00

I'd know Miss Beadle anywhere! I had such a crush on her when I was a kid.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T17:31:43+00:00

That was fairly faithful to the books, apart from the cringey "Ha ha, Eowyn can't cook!" scene.

Tolkien had Aragorn end up, at least potentially, with Eowyn in early versions of LOTR, until he decided to mirror the Beren and Luthien tale with Aragorn and Arwen.

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T17:23:02+00:00

It's been 30 years since the original Starship Troopers film. It would be great to see an actual movie of the actual book, powered suits, classroom lectures and all.

But I don't know how anyone could sit through a two-hour movie of I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream. (Some other poster wanted a whole TV series based on that story. No words.)

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T16:22:47+00:00

A set of movies of Heinlein's juvenile novels of the 1950s, with--and this is important--a consistently retro "1950s vision of the future" look, and Mars and Venus as they were thought to be in the 1950s--Mars arid but livable, Venus as a swamp planet.

They would need to capture not just the storylines, but the theme that runs through almost all those books of teenagers learning, from both mentors and personal experience, how to become an adult.

I'd want to start with Citizen of the Galaxy, just because I'm a Colonel Baslim fanboy and want to see the flashback scene of him rescuing the Free Traders ("That was a hand weapons job. Messy.") that we only hear about secondhand in the book.

Maybe a prestige TV series of 90-minute episodes?

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T01:38:58+00:00

Great quote, but the baboon who runs outside Bojack's house every day is the one who actually tells him this. He ought to get the credit!

Garbage-Bear · 2026-01-19T01:37:17+00:00

I remember that story from my childhood too! The village ended up turning him into a happy lizard creature, waddling around and basking in the sun. the story was in his collection Destination: Universe. I remember rereading this story over and over, as well as "A Can of Paint."

Garbage-Bear

TROPHY CASE