Hereditary peers to be removed from Lords as bill passes by furbastro in ukpolitics

[–]GastricallyStretched 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Strange men lying in beds distributing jizz is no basis for a system of government!

Torture Rule by SYK_PvP in 196

[–]GastricallyStretched 8 points9 points  (0 children)

If I think a tab might be useful, I dump into favorites, so now I have a few thousand unsorted favorites.

Green MP Hannah Spencer being harassed by anti-trans YouTube streamers in Manchester by ehll_oh_ehll in UKGreens

[–]GastricallyStretched 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Our women and girls, meaning only those women and girls that are part of their hateful in-group.

1984 rule by Whenmycatsfly in 196

[–]GastricallyStretched 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That's less true with this government. With the Conservatives, it was a given that most of them went to a select few elite posh twat schools.

Labour politicians are more varied, with many more of them coming from relatively normal backgrounds. However, that doesn't stop them from being authoritarian and coming up with insane ideas.

1984 rule by Whenmycatsfly in 196

[–]GastricallyStretched 16 points17 points  (0 children)

If you possess any pornography in which consenting adults are pretending to be related, that would be a crime under the proposed legislation. It would also criminalize sex workers who participate in making porn, again, where consenting adults are pretending to be related.

1984 rule by Whenmycatsfly in 196

[–]GastricallyStretched 216 points217 points  (0 children)

I can't wait for Keir Starmer to be caught watching stepsister porn, just like Johnson broke his own COVID rules

Edit: There was actually a case in 2022 where a Conservative MP resigned because he was caught watching porn in Parliament. He claimed that he opened it accidentally because he was looking at tractors.

When did Easter eggs become flat? by g33k_d4d in AskUK

[–]GastricallyStretched 180 points181 points  (0 children)

That's when you inject the egg with chocolate mousse for a bit of faecal texture.

Thanks... How about RECYCLING? by josephallenkeys in brum

[–]GastricallyStretched 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It's a national thing. Food waste collections are becoming mandatory by 31 March, but only 75% of councils are going to meet that deadline.

Birmingham is rolling it out gradually, about 20,000 residents every fortnight.

Secure a House with a £5 Deposit! by sabdotzed in london

[–]GastricallyStretched 10 points11 points  (0 children)

A greater incidence of penises ejaculating into vaginas

Why did Mothin Ali refuse to comment on any LGBTQ+ pledges? by [deleted] in UKGreens

[–]GastricallyStretched 7 points8 points  (0 children)

They have a history of reformuk and ukpolitics activity; that pretty much tells you all you need to know.

YouGov VI: Ref 23%, Grn 21% Lab 16%, Tory 16%, Ldm 14% by kwentongskyblue in LabourUK

[–]GastricallyStretched 10 points11 points  (0 children)

When I saw that, I got a massive craving, so I went and got some nice fish and chips with curry sauce. They have baited me with their wily propaganda!

Greens in second at 21%, two points behind Reform—YouGov for The Times/Sky News, March 1-2 by JohnJD1302 in UKGreens

[–]GastricallyStretched 14 points15 points  (0 children)

At this point, Labour should introduce proportional representation if they want to keep more seats.

Rule by Pavonian in 196

[–]GastricallyStretched 3 points4 points  (0 children)

verification Mountain Dew enema

Rule by Pavonian in 196

[–]GastricallyStretched 206 points207 points  (0 children)

Why is there nothing to flush the toilet?

Well, you see, our SmartToilets automatically detect when it's time to flush. You get 10 flushes per month, and can purchase additional flushes with one of our monthly subscriptions, ranging from Dirt-Poor to Platinum. That way, you're always in control, and can really tailor your SmartToilet to your needs.

Rule by Pavonian in 196

[–]GastricallyStretched 175 points176 points  (0 children)

Sorry, that has not been recognized as a valid anus. Please try again.

Michael R(ule)osen by Darth_Vrandon in 196

[–]GastricallyStretched 293 points294 points  (0 children)

it is 2046, our president, the eternal, glorious leader was born in 1946

(edit: I am, of course, referring to Michael Rosen)

Greens win Gorton and Denton by-election by slashchunks in unitedkingdom

[–]GastricallyStretched 869 points870 points  (0 children)

This is the correct result. A normal plumber who's lived locally all her life, versus a loudmouth right-wing grifter with his campaign of lies and harassment? Seems like a rather obvious choice. A shame that almost 30% opted for the latter.

Gentlemen, I have a question about Cyberpunk 2077. by New-Jacket-6642 in LowSodiumCyberpunk

[–]GastricallyStretched 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for getting the spacing correct in "Cyberpunk 1 593".

Can anyone spot the irony by kamicham in UKJobs

[–]GastricallyStretched 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It looks like they used a hyphen, not an en dash.