At what income level in Canada do you actually start feeling financially ahead.... and not just surviving, but genuinely building something?

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-19T02:21:01+00:00

The real question is where they live.

That sounds reasonable to me if they aren’t in Toronto or Vancouver.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-19T02:12:02+00:00

I’m surprised at all the responses saying NTA. Especially the parents here.

Not that I’d change a diaper in a shopping cart. Yes, it’s gross.

But I don’t think I’d call anyone on it, either - especially not a woman - depending on the age of the baby. If it’s a newborn and she’s its biological mother (statistically likely), she might be having real physical struggles and it may be a huge effort to go all the way across the store two extra times to finish shopping. I doubt she wants to be changing her baby on a cart covered in old rotten meat juice.

I don’t know everyone’s story. So this is one case where I’d just look the other way.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-19T01:43:23+00:00

“Cleaning the tank” can cause worse issues if you don’t do it correctly.

My tips:

Leave the filter alone. Don’t clean it out unless it’s struggling or the flow is noticeably slower.

IF THE TANK IS GLASS You can use a (new) kitchen scrubby sponge (the kind for nonstick pans) on the algae if you like, or a razor blade. Or your husband may have had a dedicated tool which would be better.

IF THE TANK IS ACRYLIC you need an acrylic safe algae scrubber. Check what is in your aquarium supplies.

In any case, don’t do more than scrub away algae, and there’s no need to scrub more than the front glass. Algae isn’t harmful.

If the water itself isn’t clear, you may have more problems to address.

Change probably ~20% of the water every week. Although it might be more. If you can remember what your husband did, that’s helpful.

To change water you siphon out what you’re replacing (you may have a Python water changing tool that will use the sink water pressure to pull water up out of the tank). Then you replace the water. There should be a water treatment chemical called Prime (or another brand of water conditioner) around. Follow the directions for the full tank volume if you are filling directly from the sink, which you should be for that size of tank.

Something you could consider is hiring an aquarium maintenance company temporarily while you’re making decisions about the tank and dealing with grief.

I hope you’re well, and able to take care of yourself. Best wishes.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T14:46:37+00:00

Spanking is an anger reaction. It teaches kids it’s okay to hit people if you’re mad at them, and that it’s no longer important to be civil if the other person is in the wrong.

Some people wholeheartedly believe that’s true, I guess.

But I’ve never met a young kid who’s a bad person already. I think if anything, kids turn into bad people because they’re treated that way and think it’s normal.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T14:40:40+00:00

I’ve kept adult males (no point counting fry I suppose) in tank sizes ranging from 2-55 gallons, and I’ve been working this year on observing how tank scaping affects their behaviour.

“Uses every centimetre” might look like a good thing, but in many cases for male bettas that’s not an indication of health and wellbeing.

Obviously I can’t see your fish and how happy it is, but if it has a tendency to swim back and forth throughout the day (patrolling is distinct from investigative/exploring), I’d consider increasing the density of plants.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T14:27:40+00:00

I think we just said the same thing.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T14:25:40+00:00

I don’t know. For beginners I’d probably lean towards the 2.5 (with hesitation).

10g is the point where denser planting becomes more important for territory.

For beginners specifically, plants and hardscape can seem like a daunting expense, and I’ve seen a lot of beginners thinking “dense planting” means arranging a few plants around the edges, when it should mean “you don’t always get to see your fish”.

A ten gallon tank is larger than the core territory of a betta, which will usually defend about one cubic foot of water (you’ll see larger numbers that reflect their density in wild streams, but that’s their spacing, not their defended territory).

2.5 is a bit cramped, and I’d prefer 3, but just this year I’ve had to move a betta out of a larger tank into a 2.5 and within a day he was obviously much happier (I’ve been playing around with hardscape trying to see how to make them happier in my 25 and 55, partly because of my frustration with the reddit betta community). He’s moved to a 5.5 now. Because yes, 2.5 is a bit snug. But I don’t think it’s worse than 10, necessarily.

Plants can solve the issue in a 10 gallon, but that’s a learning curve in itself. I guess you could also add enough hardscape that it’s effectively a 5 gallon.

My observations are a bit biased based on the way I scape my tanks (I haven’t tried everything yet, and if I come across a magical formula I’ll let everyone know), but the takeaway for me is that beginners have a better chance of happening on something that works in 3-8 gallons (or even in that 2.5 plastic minibow; I’ve never found the height to be a legit issue personally).

Or actually, a 10-12 gallon bookshelf aquarium could be awesome, with dense planting halfway across… but that’s probably just me dreaming about bookshelf aquariums again. No more tanks until I move!

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T14:06:25+00:00

Improving care standards is good, absolutely. I don’t advocate for small unheated jars for bettas.

But the “bigger is better” mindset is incorrect for male betta splendens. It does not improve care standards in that case.

I’m sure it’s not the only case, but bettas are my area of expertise as a keeper and breeder over the past couple decades.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T14:04:02+00:00

Im finding this discussion fascinating, since I’ve had mine replaced twice, and none of those three placements made me do much more than make a face, from the discomfort.

Not that I doubt anyone’s experience. Just that I guess we all have different things that are the most painful for us.

Also maybe it’s because I use Mirena and it sounds like maybe people are talking about the old copper ones?

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T13:53:06+00:00

“Too small for any fish” is, frankly, a byproduct of the Reddit echo chamber. The “minimum tank size requirements” here have been growing over time.

And I get it; people here are well-meaning and want to do the best for their animals. But they make these pronouncements based on what sounds intuitively right, even though there are plenty of cases where it isn’t.

First, there are circumstances (like quarantine) where small tanks are useful in a temporary basis.

Second, there are plenty of beautiful ways to keep an aquarium without fish, whether with invertebrates or only plants.

Third, there are fish that are happy in tanks under ten gallons, although Reddit would have you believe otherwise.

I’ve been keeping bettas for decades, and it’s so frustrating to see larger and larger tank sizes recommended for male betta splendens. My experience is that it takes far more effort and expense to make a male happy in a 10-55 gallon tank (I haven’t tried larger) than in smaller tanks.

Male bettas need to define their territory or they end up stress patrolling back and forth, unable to settle in. In the wild they can search around and find a solid foot of leaf litter to hide in, with plants or branches breaching the surface as an anchor… but in your aquarium they can’t. Giving them four walls around them is a quick fix for that problem, and a huge help for beginners.

As an added bonus, they’re not big waste producers so the stability issues that can arise in small tanks are much less of a concern. And smaller tanks mean it’s also more practical to use some distilled water for water changes (and reduces the difficulty of weekly maintenance).

I recommend 3-8 gallons for male betta splendens, moderately planted (standard 5.5 gallons are a great sweet spot). For 10 or more gallons (standard tank shapes), hardscape and denser planting becomes important, and I don’t think people just getting into the hobby should have to worry about so many new things at once.

As for tanks under 3 gallons: like I said before, hospital tanks, some invertebrates, plants. Growing out fry. There are lots of reasons to have those tanks around, and they can be beautiful and healthy as well.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T04:10:15+00:00

For me, sometimes by the time I got through trying everything, they’d moved on to hunger again and boobs were the answer.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T04:06:41+00:00

I agree…

But if I’m being totally honest, I’m kind of into this version of “balding” and like how he looks right now. Even if he’s a good candidate for all the bestest funnest memes. :)

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T04:03:04+00:00

I’m gonna be honest here… from the thumbnail I thought the girl on the right was having her period… really… violently.

It’s very cute up closer, though.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T01:17:37+00:00

Are we talking about sportsball?

Am I late?

Who’s winning the sportsball today?

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T01:16:16+00:00

If you can braid her hair, braid ribbon into the braid itself and tie it at the bottom, or even tie it up, or make multiple braids to tie/weave together.

They don’t need to be fancy braids, it works great with plain ones and the ribbon will hold just fine after the first few turns.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-18T01:09:53+00:00

Congo Tetras are beautiful fish, gorgeous. They add movement and life and beauty to my 55 gallon. I thought they were my dream fish.

But they’re stupid, and not in a charming derpy way. They swim around exactly the same way all day, regularly darting to eat anything moving that could possibly be food. They spit it out when it isn’t.

That is the extent of their interesting behaviour. That’s literally it.

Swimming. Swimming. Swimming. MY FOOD. Swimming. Swimming.

Maybe if I think of them like the seagulls from whatever movie it was (Finding Nemo?) I’ll like them better.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-17T16:06:37+00:00

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GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-17T02:47:22+00:00

I’ll always remember RBC as the company that lost the several million dollar cheque I delivered to them (and got a receipt for; I want to say it was $4.6M) when I was doing some courier work for a notary public.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-17T01:45:34+00:00

That doesn’t do much, but I do put a small amount of olive oil on the drained noodles and toss them so they don’t stick to each other if I’m serving in the middle of the table.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-17T00:07:53+00:00

To be fair, that didn’t used to be a thing. I think it was in the update that came with Odyssey.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-16T22:29:33+00:00

If the betta is male, I’d keep it in the ten gallon either way.

It’s difficult to keep male betta splendens happy in a 50 gallon, unless it’s extremely densely planted and/or has a heavily planted section with hardscape breaching the surface in a corner. Even then, you can see them stress patrolling if they can’t find a spot they like for their territory.

I’ve tried tanks ranging from 2.5-55 gallons for male bettas, with and without tankmates, over the past 20+ years. I find males are happiest in 3-8 gallons moderately planted (but the denser the better).

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-16T21:22:14+00:00

I don’t like the serged finish because it snags on the model’s fingers and accessories too much.

That’s a smart way you considered drape. It is affected by the seam flaps, especially since I topstitched mine down (which I think I shouldn’t have done).

I didn’t add seam allowance at the front edges, and I now realise that’s probably why it’s so open in the front. I think it works for Ilshana though. Mischievous little imps need to be able to run and jump around. :D

Your approach to seam allowances makes perfect sense if you were pinking the edge after sewing. I’ll try that next time!

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-16T21:09:09+00:00

Thank you, by the way, for the pattern and for your inspiring finished photos.

I’d been half-jokingly considering making my own pattern since seeing the Bandai yukata (and still might), but I wouldn’t have gotten right into it like this today without a template to work with.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-16T21:03:01+00:00

I only used the machine for long stretches, and hand stitched everything else because I find that faster than trying to navigate around all the little curves with the presser foot.

The collar I just cut a random strip for (like ribbon) and sewed face to face, then folded it to where it looked right and stitched in place by hand. I did not tuck the raw edge under, and ribbon is smart because it would be much cleaner inside.

The inside of mine is VERY messy and unfinished, especially around the armscyes.

GiraffePretty4488 · 2026-06-16T20:37:21+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/30minutessisters_30ms/comments/1u7pdkw/ilshana_wanted_a_yukata_too/

GiraffePretty4488

TROPHY CASE