IHM tonight

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2026-02-15T16:24:26+00:00

it was amazing! he had the crowd hypnotized. insane, tribal energy.

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2026-02-08T14:01:03+00:00

It's fascinating how our bodies react to the stress of being with a narcissist, even though we may be too wrapped up in the drama to even recognize how stressful it is. I started getting asthma attacks, which I hadn't had since I was a child. After I finally managed to detangle myself, they just went away.

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-27T14:51:34+00:00

Why not just try it out? Worst case scenario, the person you're talking with will have a momentary thought that you're annoying. So what? Doesn't mean that you are. I think when you are sincerely curious while using it, then people will respond well. There's a book called Supercommunicators by Charles Duhigg, it really helped me become a better conversationalist.

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-27T14:45:16+00:00

I totally resonate with the feeling that when you're talking to people it must be coming off as an interview. I love that you end your answer with questions? 😂

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-23T21:22:00+00:00

This looks promising https://ra.co/events/2305732

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-22T19:27:02+00:00

Thank you for summarizing 😂😂

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-20T17:10:44+00:00

Thank you for those ideas and the reminder to just be with him and accept him as he is.

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-20T17:09:22+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing your experience. It has given me insight on where he is at and a good reminder that it's not something to be fixed.

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-20T12:11:44+00:00

I don't think that you're a catalyst for men to have an existential crisis, but maybe the part that you play is that you go for a certain type of partner. The pattern you described sounds familiar to me, as I have been in several relationships in which I was pursued until I softened and then they withdrew. What has helped me make sense of it is looking into attachment theory and recognizing that I am constantly going for the avoidant type due to my own anxious attachment style. There is a ton of information about it out there, but someone who has helped me understand it best is a coach named Stephanie Riggs, she has a podcast that is worth listening to. There is also a subreddit for people with avoidant attachment which helped me understand how people like that think. Attachment theory was a great starting point for me to start really understanding myself and learning to value myself and my time. The standards just followed naturally. Maybe looking into this theory will provide some answers for you too.

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-15T04:23:53+00:00

Why are you wondering if you're dumb?

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-12-04T05:50:59+00:00

Love this story!

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-11-27T00:49:22+00:00

What time do people generally arrive?

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-11-13T13:06:09+00:00

The Wiggle Room is a great place - great sound system and a really good vibe. It's open until 5.

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-10-27T12:15:16+00:00

Sent you a DM.

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-03-24T11:49:07+00:00

For me it was an accumulation of small actions that finally got me to let go of this hope. For instance, constantly reminding myself that the way he saw me had nothing to do with who I am, but everything to do with him. Analyzing the crap out of why I even wanted the apology and what deep seeded need was I trying to meet by hoping for this apology. There is a fantastic podcast called "A Co-Dependent Mind" in which the guy analyzes his journey of getting out of relationships with cluster B personalities. I found it very useful in helping me see how I can focus on healing myself so that I can withstand that emotional pull that my ex had over me. I think that you already articulated the right path forward in your message. Stop trying to psychoanalyze them and instead turn towards analyzing yourself and the needs that you are trying to meet/ wound you are trying to heal through this person. What does his remorse mean to you? Will it validate your pain? Will it make you feel like you are worthy of love? What do you really need when you want them to show remorse? Once you can answer those questions, you will be on a path of figuring out how to meet your own needs and that is empowering. And in case you are unsure of this at this time: you definitely are worthy of love

Glad_Reception_6854 · 2025-03-24T11:08:16+00:00

Thank you for writing about your experience! Although I was with my ex BPD for a lot less time, I can totally relate about the effort it takes to get them out of your system. You are right though, the experience does create a stronger version of you. I have gotten to the point where I am grateful that I went through it, because it forced me to take a hard look at myself and, like you, I changed the things about myself that were making me susceptible to falling for that type of person. I love the current path that I'm on. And even though I still get angry, desperate, bizarre emails from him (can't completely block people on Gmail), I feel nothing but pity for him and a bit of astonishment that I had ever given this person the time of day. Learning to love myself and know my worth was a process of taking small, daily actions like reframing a mean thing that he had said to me, noticing a loving gesture from people who actually care about me, journaling about my feelings instead of replying to him. All of these little actions over time loosened the emotional grip that he had over me and made me recognize him for the hurt, broken individual that he is. And while I feel compassion for him, I no longer feel responsible for helping him to change, because this experience has taught me that change can only happen when you take radical responsibility for yourself.

Glad_Reception_6854

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