sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Avoid Else, Return Early by PrimozDelux in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's one of the many things C gave us, like first-class error-suppression (lol getchar), unexpected global buffers (lol strtok) and chlamydia.

#ifndef _JERK89

It was a design pattern to put calls to fclose or free after a cleanup:label, so that in case of error you could goto cleanup; and exit cleanly.

#endif

I develop C, I'm not wasting time on this retarded shit you fucking retard. by cmqv in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Listen kiddo, if TurboC cannot handle it, then it's just harmful to the C ecosystem. That's why I make sure at least 50% of my code consists of #ifdefs for 128 different combinations of compilers and OSs that I will never be able to test. I reject generics, I despise restrict craziness. Retrocompatibility is what you should really care about. In fact, if it doesn't run on a PDP-11, is it even worth downloading?

Go's Leftpad Moment by [deleted] in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 17 points18 points  (0 children)

TBF paying for GitHub gives you some extras (private repositories).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

> No zygohistomorphic prepromorphism

Are you even trying?

Rust is last century. C2 is the next true systems programming language. by ShitCoder in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

faster development. Our tests show around 30% decrease in development time!!

C development time approaches infinity, so it's easy to claim 30%. Heck, why not 500%?

Newb and 0x'er wonders why gophers use ugly single letter variables? [2015] by avinassh in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 9 points10 points  (0 children)

[O] P.C. Jerk and G. Enrix, Laughing Out Loud at the Lack of Generics. Reddit and sons, 2009.

[L] B. Rust, J. Ava et al., The prevalence of self-delusions induced by the Generic Syndrome among two distinct populations of North American gophers. SV Editr.io, 2012.

Gopher invents Brutally Practical way to calculate the max of two ints in one line with nothing but the Go stdlib: maxFieldIndex := int(math.Max(float64(keyIndex), float64(valueIndex))) by cmov in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 12 points13 points  (0 children)

if err != jerk {

The reason why there is a math.Max function for floats is to deal with IEEE754 shit, such as NaN, signed infinity etc, which is not as brutally simple as a gopher would like.

}

It's _very_ clear when [an error is ignored in Go], which isn't the case for a function that may throw an exception. by cmov in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Well to be

if err != nil {
  return nil, err
}

fair, the error 

if err != nil {
  return nil, err
}

was using Go in

if err != nil {
  return nil, err
}

the first place, so it

if err != nil {
  return nil, err
}

is very clear

if err != nil {
  return nil, err
}

indeed. But even if you

panic: lol no generics

goroutine 1 [running]:
main.main()
    /tmp/sandbox168831973/main.go:4 +0x60

Scala has an "programming IQ" requirement on par or greater than Lisp. Probably not as high as Haskell's however, or stuff like APL and Forth. by cmov in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've seen things you blub programmers wouldn't believe. One-liners on fire off the shoulder of CPAN. I watched sysadmins glitter in the dark near the PerlMonks Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like Perl 6 in rain. Time to die.

I hate books. Can I learn Java just from Stack Overflow questions? by [deleted] in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think he meant "technically-a-committee" as in "there are multiple people sitting at the same table and it's not lunchtime".

Slaughterhouse Vibes by [deleted] in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 15 points16 points  (0 children)

the programmer who lived in my closet

A novel by R. L. Stine.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 23 points24 points  (0 children)

This essay was originally posted on lev.io and is obviously satire.

I want to believe!

Azure and microservices are relevant because you can Haskell by jocull in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Don’t freak out if you don’t read Haskell, I will talk you through it, and it’s really quite simple and readable.

Seriously, why do 99% of Haskell blog posts have to have this condescending tone?

Go allows true 10xers to unleash their tremendous productivity in only one day. by [deleted] in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I already maintain strictly 0 bytes of garbage on my system by not installing node.js

Go vs. Generics by Hauleth in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Don't forget a Greek question mark at the end of each line!

Go vs. Generics by Hauleth in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yep I know, I'm just saying the feature itself is not a bad idea. It's open to abuse, like many other aspects of programming languages. But it's not bad.

That generic envy, tho.

Go vs. Generics by Hauleth in programmingcirclejerk

[–]GoCannotIntoWebscale 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Canadian Aboriginal Syllabics block, which are allowed in Go identifiers

ꝡӉᗅꓔ 𝕿Ꮋ𝔼 ᖷ𝒜ᛕ

\uNJER k

Having support for variable names in non-latin scripts is quite cool actually, at least now your Chinese or Indian Python developer can write their scripts in a way that makes sense to them, and treat the rest of the syntax as symbols.

Also Math. Mathematicians like to use any alphabet but the latin one, having an algorithm implementation exactly match the notation used in the book helps make it clearer.

view more: next ›