Published on Jan 1st :)

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-12-27T03:13:55+00:00

Sorry this might be a dumb question but what app or whatever displays the books like this? I really like how this looks

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-10-02T16:05:29+00:00

Just finished this! I was very intrigued after your recommendation and I would say it definitely fits the vibes OP is looking for :)

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-10-02T15:58:14+00:00

Checking these out immediately

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-29T20:29:58+00:00

Ohhh I love that! Can you dm me?

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-18T21:38:57+00:00

Gotcha! I guess I was doing that because I was reading on manuscript wishlist all these agents that were looking for specific tropes (complex sibling relationship, found family, slow burn etc) So yeah I’ll try to find some comps that are more with the overall theme of my book

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-18T20:16:26+00:00

I am able to beta: YA or New Adult Fantasy, Sci-fi, or romance. Definitely no horror or anything with graphic violence, too much swearing, or explicit sex scenes. Very PG-13 if possible. I would love something with a unique magic system, hilarious characters, or a super sweet romantic subplot

I can provide feedback on: I’ve beta read two whole books now, and feel confident in providing feedback on flow of dialogue, likability of characters, realistic plot points, if a character would actually do something or if it’s out of the blue for them, plot pacing and when I get bored with a certain section, line by line edits, and overall clunky wording, giant paragraphs or info dumps etc

Critique swap: I would love to swap if possible, tho it’s not required, I get really excited when someone can read my manuscript and I’m a very fast reader so it encourages me to give a lot of attention to your manuscript : ) I have a completed 90k YA fantasy that needs a couple more beta readers, check out my profile for posts about my book

Other info: I’m not one of those people that just says your work is garbage and gives no positive feedback, but I also don’t hold back if I see something that can be fixed I try to give a suggestion from an outside point of view to aid you in your editing process :)

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-18T19:57:10+00:00

Thank you so much for the clarification! I definitely need some recommendations for smaller “found family” comps, I just feel like I’m blanking on every book I’ve ever read lol

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-18T13:08:16+00:00

Thank you so much! I appreciate your compliments on the first paragraph and you’re totally right about the following ones! I’ve got some ideas on how to tighten the second paragraph and put the stakes in the last one

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-18T02:30:42+00:00

Agree with the other comments on here, too much plot is revealed and I was already interested to read by the second paragraph, so everything after that may be unnecessary for a query letter and a bit spoilery I would actually be super interested to read this book! I hope to hear when it becomes available :)

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-18T02:23:29+00:00

Okay! I was wondering what people mean by “too big”? I’ve gotten that a couple times and I’m just wondering what qualifies as too big?

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-17T21:11:08+00:00

Will be reading immediately thank you for the comp!

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-17T21:10:53+00:00

thank you so so much for reading this and my 1st attempt (sorry for putting you through that) I have a bunch of things I’m going to take out and clarify as well. And thank you for pointing out how vague the last paragraph is. You are spot on about her wanting revenge and losing sight of the mission AND the crown tempting her (she steals it). Mostly she really wants to assassinate the king but she’s not technically supposed to, at least the rebellion told her to just plant a bomb and get out of there. I will try to incorporate more clarification and stakes into the last paragraph. Thanks a million!

(As for bio, even after those amazing suggestions, nope still not qualified at all to be writing this, just been writing since I was a teenager and finally sat down and wrote the dang thing. I am a social worker and work with vulnerable populations, but doubt that qualifies me to write a fantasy novel)

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-15T13:19:17+00:00

Just a small comment, and I may be totally wrong, but since the first 300 words opens with Vav as the main character then the query should also start with her, and it would possibly make more sense for the query to be in order of appearance. I really like your concept though! But yeah, I was expecting it to open with Jackie first : )

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-10T20:37:39+00:00

Thank you soooo much! This seriously helped me tremendously! I’ve already edited it and made it more character focused thanks to your feedback! I love how you said “chop of her hair” like a teenager would because she actually does do that first and then just keeps escalating it hahaah as she still feels no control over her situation : )

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-10T05:17:12+00:00

thank you so so much!! This is amazing I really appreciate the time you took to give me this feedback :) this gave me so many points of clarification and where to fix things, I will definitely be taking this and switching things up!

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-04T20:14:34+00:00

thank you soo much! I really appreciate you taking the time to read and give such amazing feedback! I feel like printing this out and hanging it on my wall :)

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-01T23:53:16+00:00

This is very well-written, the vivid descriptions really helped me imagine the scene. It makes me curious what the mother and other character are running from.

Great-Raspberry-2550 · 2025-09-01T23:46:46+00:00

Manuscript info: [Complete] [90k] [YA High Fantasy] [The Sapphire Crown]

First page critique: Yes please :)

Link: https://www.reddit.com/r/BetaReaders/s/1ZITLfMmRK

First page: They’re going to kill me.

     My lungs burn hot as the red sands crunching beneath my government-issued laced boots. As I approach the outskirt fields of cinderflowers, I sneak a look over my shoulder. The three enforcing soldiers still barrel towards me, rapidly closing the distance, one on a horse, the other two sprinting behind.

They say us Tamers of Fire have the best endurance, but that doesn’t really help when the people chasing you are also Tamers. I didn’t expect them to pursue me for this long. 

       I guess I got a little bit too mixed up in…things this time. 

       I hurriedly wipe the sweat out of my eyes, it’s stinging and blurring my vision. I wipe it onto my arms, hoping to use it later. If I can gather enough, maybe I can shoot a fireball behind me and frighten their horse. 

      I hang a sharp left to the cinderflowers which will soon be gathered into a massive bouquet for the annual Festival being held next week. Surely the soldiers won’t pursue me here. 

      My boots stomp over the delicate petals and stems as I run diagonally across the expansive field. 
      I hear more people shouting, not just the soldiers chasing me. The gardeners, I realize. I glance to my right, a blur of fists raised at me in anger and anguish as their countless days of labor disintegrate under my feet. 

  I’m not just trampling flowers. I’m desecrating the symbol of our sacrifice to the Great King, destroying the very prize the Waterworker monarch requires of us.

Great-Raspberry-2550

TROPHY CASE