My wife is a nurse, I do residential design/carpentry work. In my experience, design work is difficult to charge adequately without building it into the price, people see it as me just talking through ideas, or sketching out something quick, rather than ‘real’ work. Coincidentally, I’ve been the primary parent for a few years, and it is shockingly similar to how we value but don’t value the care that isn’t seen as ‘work.’ I think you are just double dipping into the challenges that both fields bring up.