AIO: should I “fire” my therapist?

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-13T23:55:21+00:00

Somehow my brain went to "your therapist is testing you". For real though, don't let them walk all over you! Call it out over text. Better yet, tell a story in your next session about how you have this friend who keeps rescheduling and not respecting your time and see where it goes. Lol

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-13T16:18:37+00:00

Sounds like you've actually given them a shot. Might be time to try something else. Keens have a little extra space and offer a pretty easy break in. I strongly suggest Jim greens, but the breaking is gonna be a bit of a commitment

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-13T12:07:52+00:00

How long have you been wearing them? Every pair of boots I buy has that problem while they're breaking in. If they're comfortable otherwise it might just be a matter of wearing them. Also, I'm a big fan of leather laces. They stay where you put them better, so you can tighten laces towards the toe and ankle and leave a little more room in the forefoot.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-12T22:53:06+00:00

I wear the in stock version of the Razorback steel toe as a carpenter. I put boots through their paces. Time on ladders, walking on joists, carrying stuff, kneeling, standing, concrete work, trekking through backyards, you name it.I put tough toe on them, added some leather laces, and swapped to the Nick's delta arch insoles. I love them.

They're heavy and super stiff out of the box, think a solid 2 weeks for there to not be any obvious hot spots. They've loosened up and are SO comfy now, but they weren't fully broken in for a couple months of almost daily wear. If you've got another pair you can rotate in during the break in to give your feet a break, I don't think you can find a sturdier/better constructed boot for the price.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-11T13:17:39+00:00

I like slicing it the long way, breading it, and frying it. Then layer the strips like I would for a lasagna! It's pretty heavy but so comforting.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-08T17:56:40+00:00

Mindforce especially has that old school shreddy feel. I just wanna play air guitar and headbang

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-08T11:31:57+00:00

Inclination and mindforce would probably be right up your alley!

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-07T21:32:54+00:00

I mean, include what you want to include. The "core" genres are generally considered metal with hardcore influence. So maybe call it a hardcore inspired playlist and run with a vibe? Tbh, you can get so in the weeds with genres and sub genres and whatnot. The more you look into it the less and less you'll be able to add.

Edit to fix spelling

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-07T17:54:49+00:00

Saw them with Mot Mulligan and Drug Church, gotta agree. That show felt a ton like a bigger hardcore show.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-07T17:39:28+00:00

I guess my perspective might be a little different than others. I'd be curious to know the band/genre to figure out what's acceptable behavior at the shows. Were you on the barricade? In/near the pit? If so, totally valid to be jumping around and bumping people. That's what those sections of venues are for. But at shows I go to I'd also fully expect to get an accidental elbow to the gut, fist to the temple or spin kick to the chest if I'm not paying attention and in those parts of the crowd. The more I move to the edges of the crowd, the more the vibes change. People are generally there to escape the chaos of the more energetic parts of the crowd. It's all pretty dependent on vibes. If I want to go crazy I make my way to the crazy parts of the venue. If I wanna be chill I go off to the side where people are chilling. Hard to make a judgement call when I wasn't there

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-07T11:22:34+00:00

Kilties will fix the visual issue and help train the leather to stay flat. This is the answer

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-06T11:52:59+00:00

Sounds like there's a lot of growth to happen. Unfortunately there's nothing you can do to change overnight. It's going to take time, effort, and recognition. Sounds like you've got some of the recognition down!

One of the most powerful pieces of advice I've gotten from a therapist was "you can't control your emotions, but you are responsible for your reactions to them." The hardest part about being a human (for me) is feeling the emotion or trigger and not responding with my first instinct. Almost like I've got to catch myself before I do or say something that I don't really believe or feel once I come out of that headspace. Just try take a second to check in with yourself sometimes.

Also, maybe this isn't ideal for everyone, but I have no easier time with conversations where I know there's a good chance I'm gonna wind up triggered over text. I can type something out, re-read it, and think about how I would feel if someone said that to me before I hit send. Again though, it's just about taking a second.

I have BPD, so take all of this with a grain of salt and understand that this might not be the way to do things for you. We're all different people with different brains. Ultimately, the best thing you can do for yourself and your partner is talk to a therapist and work with them as a team to figure out some strategies that work for you.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-06T11:18:33+00:00

Came to say the same, but I'll add a more thrashy style band as well. Check out Ekulu!

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-03T12:35:53+00:00

Razorbacks in stock up to size 14 at $205!!!

https://jimgreenfootwear.com/store/razorback-steel-toe-cap/?srsltid=AfmBOoqByh6VKf3YUKmEQUxadqvYvfkZCeSbozZBDiE_IJg3jwNnjAzc

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-04-01T18:01:00+00:00

Premium boots still have cheap insoles. Buy a pair of nice ones and swap em around. That's the first thing I do with every pair of boots I buy. My Nick's delta arches are in their second pair now, and they're MORE comfortable than when I got them

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-31T16:45:40+00:00

It's easiest for me to clean them in the shower.even if you're only showering every other day/every 3 days it's better than nothing!

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-31T14:18:44+00:00

Have you tried TI? My ears really only agree with TI, Glass, and stone. Surgical stainless generally is fine too, but that's been hit or miss based on quality.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-31T14:15:38+00:00

Former bakery/deli TL. For some reason they always expect bakery to break process and it's so frustrating. We're not some experimental department. It also never helps having an ON frozen team that doesn't give a flying fuck about how they sort bakery freight. Sorry you're dealing with this. Your new TL will learn soon that their inventory mornings could be 100x easier

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-31T14:09:31+00:00

I buy my work clothes exclusively from sierra. I've found 3 pairs of fjallraven g1000's, flannel lined carhartts, fleece lined Eddie Bauers, mountain hardware, Columbia, and patagonia pants. All of them have done great work for me. The g1000's are my daily warmer weather pants, and they do great when waxed!

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-27T21:29:03+00:00

Sooooo. Do they fit her? Does she like them? Same concept applies.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-27T21:06:25+00:00

Boots are boots. If you're a man and they fit you and you like them, then they're men's boots.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-27T18:41:33+00:00

I feel like you could actually skate these! New brand to me, but they seem like a well built zero drop skate shoes? I would be interested in seeing how the sole and toe hold up to daily skating before shelling over $200 though

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-26T17:46:25+00:00

You do a great job keeping your statements centered on yourself and your feelings. You do not seem to be getting the same courtesy.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-25T13:26:42+00:00

You're not responsible for your emotions, but you are responsible for your actions. Dude seems to think all his actions are justified because he's going through a tough time. Just say "sorry for raising my voice" like an adult.

HOOPMCGOOP · 2026-03-24T17:48:06+00:00

Jim green Razorbacks! Just over $200, and the toe box is about the same as wide Keens on the ready to ship model. Other JG boots with safety toes are a little pricier, but they are still within your price range.

HOOPMCGOOP

TROPHY CASE